General Question

aniihCxx's avatar

I'm pregnant, no insurance. What do I do?

Asked by aniihCxx (40 points ) December 21st, 2013 from iPhone

I took a home pregnancy test a few days ago. I have no health insurance. My mom is so lazy and won’t even help me. All she says is that I need to apply for Medicaid.

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71 Answers

Smitha's avatar

Contact your local Health Department. They provide maternity care services to low income people. All states offer Medicaid coverage to pregnant woman. The amount of money you can earn and still qualify for Medicaid usually varies by state. In most states, if you earn less than $20,000, you will qualify for Medicaid. WIC will also help you find healthcare.

chyna's avatar

Call your local family planning facility and schedule an appointment. You will need to start getting healthcare all through this pregnancy. While you are there, ask for a case worker that will help you sign up for all the agencies that can help you. You will be eligible for a medical card, WIC, food stamps, baby seat for the car and a whole lot of things that you probably never thought of.
Good luck.

BosM's avatar

This isn’t about your mom being lazy and helping you. This is about you taking responsibility for yourself and a new baby.

What about the father of the baby, does he have health insurance? If so the child should be also be covered regardless of whether or not you are married.

You have access to a computer. Log onto www.healthcare.gov and get yourself enrolled into a health plan. If you enroll by December 23rd you can have coverage by January 1st.

If you cannot afford to take care of a child, or you are at a stage in your life where you do not want to then please consider adoption. There are many options for this and often they pay for your healthcare through delivery of the baby. Good luck

livelaughlove21's avatar

Apply for Medicaid and WIC just like every other woman in your situation.

LuckyGuy's avatar

This is not your mother’s problem. This is your problem – and the guy who deposited the sperm
Can you take care of this child properly?
If not then call the Planned Parenthood in your area.

Please don’t make it my problem.

hearkat's avatar

I have to back-up what @BosM and @LuckyGuy said – if you decided that you were mature enough to engage in sexual activity (rather than if you became pregnant through rape) than you chose to be accountable for the potential consequences. Whether your mother is practicing “tough love” to force you to take responsibility, or whether she’s lazy is irrelevant: your body and your pregnancy are your responsibility.

You can find the information for your state’s public assistance program on the internet. Another option would be to do a web search for Planned Parenthood, which can confirm the pregnancy, and then help you understand all the options available to you so you can make a fully educated decision about what is best for you. They can guide you to what resources you need to move forward with whatever course of action you choose.

elbanditoroso's avatar

How old are you? If you’re between 14–18, my answer would be different than if you are older.

anniereborn's avatar

@elbanditoroso
Her profile says “I’m 20yrs old.I live in Michigan and I hate it here…I’m bored!”

Seek's avatar

You’re an adult, you made a choice to have sex. Now you have to make a choice as to what to do with the result of that choice.

If you choose to end the pregnancy – Please phone Planned Parenthood. Here is a list of PP centers serving clients in Michigan. Abortion services are provided in Flint, Kalamazoo, and Ann Arbor. Other area locations will provide you with a referral.

If you choose to carry the pregnancy and are considering adoption, Here is a list of agencies who may be able to help.

If you wish to keep the baby after it is born, you’re in for some quick lessons in personal responsibility. Get yourself down to the local health department to confirm the pregnancy. Usually you can apply for Medicaid and WIC there. Then start searching for an OB-GYN or Certified Nurse Midwife that accepts Medicaid, grab a copy of “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” and start saving your pennies for a brand new crib (the resale of cribs has been recently made illegal for very stupid reasons, so you won’t find one secondhand unless you grab one on Craigslist before some idiots report the post).

Coloma's avatar

Maybe not a popular opinion, but, I vote for an abortion.
Your local Planned Parenthood or other community clinic can set you up for a safe, therapeutic termination.
The world does not need any more babies born into poverty from irresponsible people. Sorry to say the obvious, and my statement is not personal, it is simply a fact.

The FACT that you think your mother is responsible for your problem speaks volumes about your emotional maturity and bringing a child into the world sucking on the government tit is not cool.

Katniss's avatar

I agree with @Coloma.
I’m not sure where you live in MI, but if you decide to go with termination, PM me. I have some info I can give you. I’ve been there, I’m not going to judge.

Coloma's avatar

@Katniss Right, no judgement, but certainly the best option IMO.

creative1's avatar

It’s now to time learn how to do things for yourself because it wasn’t your mother who put you in the situation your in now. You need to go here http://www.michigan.gov/mdch/0,4612,7-132-63157_63210-35199--,00.html to apply for medicade and according to this site they will cover you regardless because your pregnant, next you have some big decisions to make. Heres a site that could help you make what ever decision is best for you and possibly your baby http://www.realchoice4me.com/adopt_parent.html

You have options and they are not just abortion or keeping the baby, there is also the choice of adoption. So weight all your options carefully but know this it is not your mothers responsibility to care for your child and do everything for you. If you are old enough to make the big decision to have sex then it is your responsibilty to deal with the outcomes of that big decision. This is all on you and the guy you had sex with and its no one elses responsibility. Also remember that caring for a baby is a lot harder than filling out an application for medicaid and its not all sunshine and rainbows. Babies are a lot of responsibility and you have to be willing to grow up pretty fast if you decide parenting is the route you want to go and this includes getting a job so you have money to care for your baby.

I wish you all the best with this hard time in your life.

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JLeslie's avatar

I vote for Planned Parenthood. They can tell you all your options and guide you. If you decide to abort and you are still early in your pregnancy you can just take the pills to terminate the pregnancy. If you are later they can do the surgical abortion (contact jelly deni for info on that, she went through one fairly recently, she also did a Q on it, she was very happy with her decision). If you decide to have the baby Planned Parenthood can help guide you in getting good care for free or very inexpensively.

If you are eligible for Medicaid you should apply whether you are pregnant or not. No matter what it is good to have some sort of health coverage.

aniihCxx's avatar

Of course it’s MY problem! I don’t know what I am suppose to do, my mother will not give me answers this is why I am asking on here! And yes she is being lazy. Obviously I can’t ask her for help.

nikipedia's avatar

Are you planning to keep the baby?

aniihCxx's avatar

Yes I do @nikipedia
I have an idea of what I have to do Monday. Apparently my aunt is going to try to help me out.

aniihCxx's avatar

I’m also going to be taking care of this baby on my own. But with a lot of support from my family and friends. I’m not considering abortion. Even though I do think it is best

nikipedia's avatar

Why are you keeping the baby?

Seek's avatar

Just for the sake of argument…

You’re 20. Are you enrolled in college? are you currently working? Do you have your own place, or do you live in a dorm or with your parents?

Do you have any idea what daycare costs? Whether daycare even works with your commute? (For example, I couldn’t put my kid in daycare because there was no way I could be able to pick him up by closing time after getting off work downtown at 5:30.)

There are about ten BILLION ways a baby will take your time, your money, your freedom.

I love my son to death. I do. My husband and I planned for him and everything. But there are times I wish I had gone to school and had a social life before choosing to have a child.

JLeslie's avatar

@aniihCxx Do you have a job? You’re worried about not having health insurance, but when the baby is born is when the real expense really starts. Basic care for a pregnancy if you have no complications isn’t that expensive especially with the help provided by Planned Parenthood and other organizations.

Seek's avatar

And here’s the part where I start talking about pregnancy complications.

Hyperemesis. That means, puking for nine months straight.
Fainting spells. Can’t work, can’t drive, because you just might pass out. In the post office. And hit your head on a counter. Believe me, it hurts.
Cervical failure – you could spend seven or eight months on bed rest. Who’s going to take care of you?
Birth complications include anything from severe pain to death for both mother and child, and literally anything inbetween.

My son was two weeks postdates. Meaning I carried him for almost ten months. He was 10½ lbs. I birthed him naturally. It took 37 hours of induced, painful, back labor. His shoulders were stuck behind my pelvic bone, and getting him out ripped my perineum in two. Then, after I was all stitched up and fixed from that, my uterus started haemorrhaging. I hit a ten on the pain scale, lost five pounds of blood and almost died. It took three days for my body to recover from the dehydration enough to start producing breast milk, which lead to me developing mastitis in my right breast. Fucking OUCH.

Having a baby is no picnic.

aniihCxx's avatar

All I so is work. I am 22 now. It’s been awhile since I’ve been on here. @seek_kolinahr
I havn’t enrolled for anything. I stay at my parents. And I just work, eat and sleep.
I think I know what I’m getting myself into

Seek's avatar

I don’t want to come across like I’m trying to convince you one way or the other. It’s just that 9 times out of 10, people talk about how “you’ll never remember the bad parts of your labor” or “your body naturally forgets that stuff.” Fuck that shit. I still have nightmares of pain and cold and morphine buzz.

aniihCxx's avatar

Sorry you had to go through all that! Ouch! Forsure @seek_kolinahr

Seek's avatar

All I’m saying is this: If you think you know what you’re getting into, you don’t.

I’m not kidding.

JLeslie's avatar

Work, eat, sleep, and I hope save some of that money. If you aren’t paying rent, maybe you are, then I assume you have a stash of cash.

What’s the story with the father? If you don’t get along well with him, beware, having a baby with him will be most likely a disaster. In MI fathers have no rights to the baby born out of wedlock unless they go to court to get visitation or custody. He will be “forced” to pay child support if you name him as the father though. Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer.

aniihCxx's avatar

@JLeslie yea I just pay for the phone bills.
Ugh the father…long story short, it’s not that we don’t get a long, he just stopped talking to me because he decided to be with someone else. He’s an ass

nikipedia's avatar

@aniihCxx, can I ask again why you want to have this baby? Do you want to be a parent, or do you have a moral opposition to abortion?

Seek's avatar

^ I second the question.

aniihCxx's avatar

Oh I’m scared to have an abortion. For a couple reasons

livelaughlove21's avatar

I can only assume she’s got some moral objection to it, because there’s no other logical reason to keep it. 22 years old and still living at home, in no way independent, no daddy, no insurance, low-paying job (if it paid well, she wouldn’t be living at home still), no college education….and she says she knows what she’s getting herself into? Yikes.

I’d love to know all the answers to @Seek_Kolinahr‘s questions about daycare. Do you plan to live with mommy forever? If not, how do you plan to move out and support yourself and a baby? Diapers, food, clothes, toys, daycare – all on top of rent, utilities, phone, gas, etc. Like I said, there’s no logical reason to keep the child. So it must be a moral issue.

Seek's avatar

An early term abortion is much safer than a pregnancy brought to term. There are so many ways having a baby can maim or kill you. Darwin’s Lottery. I’m not lying.

livelaughlove21's avatar

@aniihCxx Scared to have an abortion, but not scared to be responsible for another human being for the next 18 years? Girl, you have no clue what scary even is. But you’ll find out soon enough…

Seek's avatar

And just think – it might be more than 18 years. Look at your mom. She’s been responsible for 22 and counting, and you’re calling her lazy!

Judi's avatar

Healthcare.gov. Get insurance. Preexisting conditions don’t matter.

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Coloma's avatar

Listen to all of us wise elders & parents here. You should not fear abortion, you should fear being responsible for a child ( PERSON ) coming into existence and all that means in the big picture.
You are the poster girl for why abortion is the highest choice you can make, for yourself and that of an innocent unborn child.
If you were my daughter we’d be having a serious discussion as to your situation.

I have a 26 year old daughter and there is no way I would take on the responsibility for a grandchild in your circumstances. Luckily she is very responsible and this would never happen, she has taken the morning after pill, once, when a condom fell off during sex. She didn’t even wait to find out if she was pregnant, she went straight to the doctor the very next day!
Are you prepared to put this baby first, every day, all the time, for decades to come?

You live at home, only pay a phone bill, haven’t told the father, and think your mother is somehow “lazy” for not doing what?
Girl, you need to grow up and fast, you are not mother material at this phase of your life.
Tough words for a tough situation. You need a spanking kiddo, not a baby.

JLeslie's avatar

Fear the abortion? You mean the procedure? Abortion is a walk in the park compared to delivering a baby. I have never had an abortion, nor have I delivered a baby, but I have heard many many stories of both and I feel very confident birthing a baby is way more difficult.

If you are morally opposed to abortion I would not try to argue with you about it, but if you mean you are afraid it will hurt or something like that, that just makes no logical sense.

geeky_mama's avatar

As someone who has has delivered a baby (twice) and had an abortion procedure (D&C after a miscarriage) I can assure you that labor and delivery of a baby is WAY harder on your body and much more traumatic (and painful) than an early term abortion procedure. (Oh, and that’s assuming you don’t need a C-section to deliver your baby…because that is even more medically difficult—it’s major surgery.)

If you fear having an abortion then do a little Googling on the internet and watch some birth videos. Then talk to someone at your local Planned Parenthood about what an abortion at your early stage of pregnancy would be like vs. labor and delivery..and you can decide for yourself..but anyone who has experienced both will tell you abortion is not nearly as painful or difficult as labor and delivery.

Moreover, aside from your own fear of abortion—think for just a moment about everything that becoming a parent will involve. Not just the expense (and it is VERY expensive)..but also think about the sleep deprivation (it is very real—babies need to get up and eat every few hours for the first few months)...and then remember you are responsible to raise up this little person…the time and effort it takes to parent a child to maturity.

Now consider for a moment your child could be born with special needs, or you could have a fussy baby that cries for hours inconsolably or could become sick and need special medical care…and think VERY hard. You want to take this on alone? It takes a village to raise any child..but being a single parent is extra hard work.

Also, even if you don’t get along with the father—he is still the father of the child. He has every right (and can pursue that legal right!) to see his child. Think hard about whether you want to be in contact with this person and co-parent with him for the next 18+ years because that is what you’re potentially signing up for if you decide to have his baby.

Yes, HIS baby. Because it’s not just yours. You need to think beyond your own selfish fears, wants and hopes..and start thinking like a parent. A parent thinks about what is best for their child first and foremost.
What kind of a life is your child going to have? Can you provide the sort of childhood, love and basic necessities (food, health care, clothes, toys, education) that your child will need to grow up to their best potential?

Being a parent involves a lot of self-sacrifice. If you are unable or unwilling to be unselfish and think first about your child’s needs and wants…you should think very hard about not keeping this child.

DWW25921's avatar

Sign up for Obamacare. You will be denied but you’ll be put into the medicaid/care system automatically. I know some folks that have done this.

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aniihCxx's avatar

I’m sure I’d be a better mother than most. Clearly I don’t care about y’all business either. So save the stories

Seek's avatar

Well, you’ve received links to organizations in your area that can provide assistance, and relevant opinions from people who have gone before you into both birthing chamber and abortion clinic.

And we’re the lucky ones that made it out alive in both cases. And we all have our scars to bear.

If you want to break out the Jerry Springer “Y’all don’t know me!” nonsense, we can all call this done. We, as a community, try to help in what way we can, which is by providing objective advice in any way we can.

If we knew you, we couldn’t be objective. The fact that we don’t know you allows us to tell you the hard stuff – like the fact that you’re a 20-something pregnant girl living at home with no real world experience and no daddy in the picture makes you less than an ideal parent.

JLeslie's avatar

I do think it is a little harsh to beat the OP up about not knowing what to do to get medical care while pregnant. She’s young and has never been pregnant before. There is no reason a 22 year old would know what to do if she became pregnant if she has been in general good health and doesn’t go to the doctor usually. It’s a good thing she wants to know what to do to have a healthy pregnancy and baby.

There are no stupid questions! She could have just waited months and months and done what too many girls do and get no medical attention for months.

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jonsblond's avatar

I agree with @JLeslie.

@aniihCxx I hope you find the help you need. The links posted for you on this question will lead you in the right direction. Good luck.

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SadieMartinPaul's avatar

This might not make me popular, but I agree with @Coloma. You say that you won’t consider terminating your pregnancy, although you do “think it is best.” Do you have religious beliefs that prevent you from doing what’s “best”? How about finding a caring, responsible couple to adopt the baby?

You posted a question, and you asked for our opinions. I’m going to give you mine, straight on. You may be 22-years-old, but you’re not mature or grounded enough to become a mother and raise a child. Instead of taking responsibility for your situation, you blame your mother for being too lazy to help you. When I read your original message, I thought that you must be a young teenager, not a grown adult.

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LuckyGuy's avatar

Sounds like another child will be born into poverty and end up on the welfare roles.
Maybe the OP is on to something. Pregnancy is one way to end boredom.

jonsblond's avatar

I can easily put myself in @aniihCxx place. I was 20 years old and living at home when I found out I was pregnant for the first time. I was lucky to have the support of my boyfriend (husband now) and the support of my family. I can only imagine how @anihCxx feels. Alone with no support and stangers on the internet badgering her. Many of your comments are hurtful and of no help at all. Have a little compassion.

I’m glad I didn’t have the internet when I was in a similar situation.

deni's avatar

If you don’t want a baby, please don’t have a baby unless you are going to give it up for adoption. There are a million unwanted kids in the world already and just because you accidentally became pregnant is not a reason to add another one. Also as @Coloma said, you are insinuating that your mother should be helping you….she could be, but she surely does not have to. It is your problem. If you don’t have insurance for yourself, how much cheaper is it going to be to have to get insurance, then get insurance for a child, and also add in all the costs of raising a child, for 18 years? The easiest solution is an abortion, especially like I said if this is not something you want. Abortion horror stories do not apply to everyone and I think with the internet nowadays it is very very easy to get scared out of having one simply by reading exaggerated horrible accounts of a few peoples experiences. I had one a year ago and have never felt a pang of regret, I know I would hate my life if I had to deal with a child right now. That is the honest truth, from my point of view. Good luck, I hope it works out.

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Coloma's avatar

I had an abortion many moons ago, within a year of Row vs. Wade and the legalization of abortion. I was in my teens and, as @deni says, no regrets, not once, not ever.
I was smart enough to know that having a baby at that age would be a disaster for all involved.

Katniss's avatar

I had an abortion at 39. I was laid-off and with a guy that was abusive. No way in hell was I bringing a child into that situation. This guy’s dad was so concerned about me he paid for it.

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jonsblond's avatar

And I have two sisters who have had an abortion and they both regret their decision some 20 years later. Not everyone is the same.

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Seek's avatar

Exactly what help did she not receive? If she wanted to know how to apply for Medicaid, several posts explained that. If she wanted to abort, that information is posted. If she wanted to put the kid up for adoption, that’s here too.

We’re not the people to hold her hand and tell her everything is going to be OK. That’s what her friends are for. That’s what her family is for. We don’t know her, or her situation. All we can give is impersonal advice and information. Which we did.

The girl’s in a sucky situation. And she’s doing a good job of making it much worse for herself. But it’s ok, because she knows what she’s getting into.

chyna's avatar

She didn’t say she wanted to know about abortions. Several posts were bullying her into choosing an abortion.
I think people forget what it was like to be young and in trouble and instead of guiding or helping, they come off as pushing their ideas on others without an ounce of kindness.

jonsblond's avatar

I would think if a person is pro-choice they wouldn’t go about lecturing a young woman about what she should do with her own body. Many people provided links that were helpful. A personal account about how awful your own young life was, and using that as a way to persuade a young woman after she has said she doesn’t want an abortion is not helpful. It’s pushing your own agenda.

hearkat's avatar

I had an abortion years ago and don’t regret it, and I am adamantly pro-choice. If I personally knew a young person in the situation the OP described, I would have suggested abortion to her. I am also a tough-love mama to my own son.

However, I do not know the OP, so I suggested that she go to a place where trained professionals could assess the status of the pregnancy and inform her of her choices and guide her through the decision-making process and beyond. I did not feel this was the place for telling her what the options were or what my opinion of what is best might be.

Although she clearly has much to learn about life (as nearly everyone does at 22), the harsh manner in which some presented it here is certainly not conducive to teaching a young mind to open up and see the bigger picture. I am not in the least bit surprised that she became defensive – possibly enough that she is now even more determined to proceed with the pregnancy and raise the child on her own.

Coloma's avatar

The only agenda I was pushing was an ideal agenda.
Bottom line, the world does not need anymore single mothers without resources.
I believe everyone needs to stop reproducing to save this planet as it is, and especially in cases such as this one. I don’t feel any “bullying” has taken place, just clear and direct advice, some needed straight talk.

Of course this person is free to make whatever choices they feel are best.

LeavesNoTrace's avatar

I would terminate. Sorry but in your situation, it would be the most sensible. No judgement here, it’s your right to do whichever you see fit but yeah, at the age of 20, you’re likely not financially or emotionally equipped to deal with parenthood.

1. Your social life is over as you know it

2. Your career will be over before it begins. Don’t you want to pursue an education and be successful for yourself and your future children if you want them later?

3. What’s your relationship to the potential baby’s father? Do you want to be essentially bound to him forever? Because that’s what happens when you have a child with someone, even if you’re not “together”, you’ll always have to put up with them until that child is an adult.

4. Sorry but if you’re still living at home, uninsured, and have no job/education that kid is going to have a hard life. Is it fair to bring a child into such circumstances?

“The path to Hell is paved with good intentions.” Be logical about this and you’ll find it suits you best in life.

glacial's avatar

@jonsblond To be honest, it sounds like the OP does want an abortion and is being bullied into not getting one. I think that’s what she means about being scared of it – after all, she did say that she thinks “it is best”.

LeavesNoTrace's avatar

@glacial That’s an interesting point. I certainly hope that whatever decision she makes, it isn’t from any duress from a third party. Has she deleted her account?

glacial's avatar

@LeavesNoTrace So it appears. And I agree about the duress.

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