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janbb's avatar

What have you learned about yourself in 2013?

Asked by janbb (44570 points ) January 1st, 2014

I’ve learned how fuckung resilient I am and that you can lose limbs (flippers?) and start to grow new ones even if it hurts like hell. And that good friends might be as or more important than lost family. What have you learned?

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44 Answers

BosM's avatar

I’ve learned that I need to be a better listener, to be more patient and fully listen to what people are telling me before I offer a response or a perspective. I have a need to improve in this area, especially when being pressured in tight deadlines situations.

I’ve also learned I have a tremendous capacity to lead and mentor others, build high performing teams, and help those around me to grow as professionals. It’s been very satisfying to “pay it forward”.

LilCosmo's avatar

I learned that I am capable of accomplishing goals – even if it takes 30 years and that I can succeed even at things I dread and come out on the other end smarter and better prepared to face whatever life my bring. Oh I also learned that even though I thought I wanted one thing more than anything else, turns out there are things that have an even stronger pull. I’m excited to start a new, if somewhat unexpected career.

glacial's avatar

I tend to make things harder for myself than they need to be. I should let myself enjoy the process more.

Unfortunately, these seem to be lessons I have to learn repeatedly. So, see you next year on the same question. ;)

gailcalled's avatar

As long as I am breathing in and out, so far it’s all doable. Even in times of major physical distress, there are good things. There are always choices; I can still decide to list my titanium artificial knee on Craig’s List.

Coloma's avatar

That my resilience and adaptability soldiers on, even if kicking and screaming all the way. haha
I have also learned that my physical being cannot be pushed as hard as I have pushed her in the past.

hug_of_war's avatar

When you need something to be done, even if it’s a tight deadline and others who are supposed to be a part of the project are major flakes, I will get it done.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I’ve learned that life continues to be unbelievably unfair. But I also learned that I can be unbelievably lucky too.

marinelife's avatar

I’ve learned that sorrows are balanced by joys.

zenvelo's avatar

I learned that expressing my fears and emotions allows me to find truth, that trying to ignore them gives them power and makes them grow stronger.

Mariah's avatar

I learned that the standard American adulthood might not be for me. Marriage, kids, settling into a job for years and years. Right now I don’t want any of that.

Hand in hand with the above, I learned (am still learning and figuring things out) that I might be asexual.

kevbo's avatar

I learned to stop chasing in relationships.

I learned to meditate for hours and actually find lasting stillness and centeredness.

I learned how to change my diet to trigger weight loss.

To reference John 16:33 and Luke 17:21, I learned how one overcomes the world and how the kingdom of God is within you. Or, what Rumi meant when he wrote that he was knocking on the door from the inside.

I learned that there is great satisfaction in playing trampoline dodgeball against school aged children.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Doesn’t “asexual” mean you can reproduce all by yourself?

Mariah's avatar

That’s the scientific meaning when it’s used to describe things like bacteria. It is also a sexual orientation that basically means you’re not interested in sex.

AssyrianKing9's avatar

I’ve learded that I was not confident, and I started working out to boost my self esteem, and it’s working.

Unbroken's avatar

So many good ones.listed here, so much to learn and so much of it is an ongoing process.

I have learned the best way to face fears and short comings is to examine them, learn more about them.

I have learned people really are kind and good.

I have learned that what I want most to accomplish before I die is to be at peace with myself.

I saw misty fog as I drove to work for weeks this year and realized it was a gift. It camoflauged the steps to unknown goal. It softened the harsh realities the long road ahead. So the immediate was the clearest and most important thing. I struggled with how to work that visual epiphany into activating. It seemed like silly meaningless words when I did not see it in front of me. Gooblygook.

But what I came to realize is I just didn’t know how to exercise those muscles to activate and use faith to pursue what I put myself before me. I am learning to walk. And exercising those muscles. I am now embraced in the fog exploring, learning to trust more and figuring out how to walk with inner strength to and how to protect myself with out also harming myself.

I still have much to learn and look forward to making progress.

creative1's avatar

I learned that just because you buy a Townhouse that you love that you can be unhappy if the people decide they don’t like you just because you have children. I also learned from personal experience just how much discrimination hurts you and how you feel about yourself. But I will survive all this and I know this too will make me stronger and a better person. I am very hopeful that 2014 will be the year for me since 14 is my favorite number. I can’t wait to move to Charlotte NC and meet up with some old friends there. I will miss my family up here in MA but I think I need some good old fashioned friendly people in my life right now.

Happy New Year to All!!!

TracyBrown's avatar

I’ve learned that it is very important to have a good friend when you are far away from home. Don’t be addicted to something that does harm your health.

anniereborn's avatar

That I have no shame wearing Depends to a VERY important and VERY awesome event that may have had limited bathroom access.
(Normally I don’t use these or need these, but….I have a “no bathroom” phobia)

ibstubro's avatar

I do not have an “agenda”.

I like hugs.

Presents I give “please me”.

Presents to me are equivocal.

AshLeigh's avatar

I learned that changing is okay. The person I am now doesn’t have to be the person I am in another year. Plans change, and people change. That is okay. There is nothing at all that I am stuck with.
Having a breakup after a year and a half is okay. I am young, and I have so much growing to do. Growing apart is okay. Moving on, even if it was “too soon” by other people’s standards, is okay.
Letting myself cry in front of someone is okay. Being comforted is okay. Getting sad when bad things happen doesn’t make me stupid, or too emotional.
Every day I have learned that I am going to be okay.

9doomedtodie's avatar

To balance the equation of change, chance, and choice.

flunomore's avatar

I learned I can write a good research article if I take enough time for it, which includes not losing time watching internet videos.

gailcalled's avatar

That from now on I will think twice about volunteering for one of these.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@gailcalled Now that you’re through it all, is it better than it was before?

gailcalled's avatar

As it happens, I graduated from PT today, after having promised that I would do my daily exercises faithfullly. I got a really ugly grey T-shirt, that says “Va***ie Physical Therapy.”

Ask me in 8 weeks; that will bring me to the 22-week mark, when my surgeon promises I will be able to think about something other than the knee during my waking hours and also star in River Dance or the Rockettes.

glacial's avatar

Huzzah!!

But please don’t Riverdance. We’d have to shun you.

jca's avatar

@gailcalled: an orthopedist told me once “when you stop physical therapy is when you’ll start feeling better. ”

gailcalled's avatar

@jca: Last week my doc told me on the qui vive that I should try to walk as much as possible as soon as possible and not worry so much about the exercises.. Of course, he’s not the one hobbling around on my knee. And doing stretching, strengthening and balance exercises can’t be all bad, can it?

@glacial: OK. How about this?

Or for something a little more tasteful

glacial's avatar

@gailcalled What a relief. I was terrified that you might have linked clips of Morris dancing.

The Dying Swan was hilarious.

Coloma's avatar

@gailcalled Haha..thanks for that, the perfect bedtime finale to my day!

gailcalled's avatar

@glacial: The dancer, Paul Ghiselin, had a classical training with the Joffrey Ballet, I guess as a ballerina. Did you notice how long he stayed en pointe, in his size 12 satin slippers?

glacial's avatar

@gailcalled Yes! Stunning. Even while being silly.

Coloma's avatar

It made me mourn for my young ankles. When they were strong and supple. lol

gailcalled's avatar

My ankles are still young; it’s just that they’re attached to my aged knees.

Rachael21's avatar

I need to get off my ass, and start making things happen for me!!

Paradox25's avatar

That I’ve gotten more liberal and progressive with age.

Rops's avatar

Be true to yourself and work hard because you can fool someone but not yourself.

janbb's avatar

I’ve also learned (in several ways) that “You can’t always get what you want but if you try sometimes, you just might get what you need.”

glacial's avatar

I just learned that I need to watch The Big Chill again.

janbb's avatar

@glacial I hope not for a bad reason.

glacial's avatar

@janbb Haha! No, Kevin Costner is still among us. But your song lyric is the third reference I’ve seen lately to that film, and each time I think I should revisit it.

janbb's avatar

Oh – just using it from the Stones song but I am always up for a “Big Chill” revisit.

Eggie's avatar

I learnt that, I am too much of a pushover and that I need to man up!

VS's avatar

I learned that people think I’m a really good listener and confide in me. They know I will never betray their confidence. I’m also pretty good about not absorbing the negativity that accompanies their unloading.

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