Social Question

LornaLove's avatar

(NSFW) Do you buy into the term that 'They are way past their prime'?

Asked by LornaLove (6174 points ) March 14th, 2014

I hear in France that a female no matter what her age is still considered something, which is so fundamentally important, a woman.

Of course most people will say that, clearly a woman is a woman, no matter her age. Or, a man is still a man no matter the number of years he has clocked up on the calendar. Many might add “But they are past their prime”. Then, it seems they play roles that are more suited to them. If they step out of the role then, all hell could break loose.

Some cultures are quite concrete in the way they approach that, which is sexy or sexual (or even allowed to be thought of as sexual). This can also be attributed to many aspects of life, such as work, careers and friendships perhaps.

If you are between the ages of say 18 and 40 you are still allowed to be sexual. When you reach your 50s and 60s it isn’t really discussed that much (in movies and media). Get to your 70s and 80s and some might even recoil at the idea that you could be anything remotely sexy or dare I say it, downright horny!

Do you buy into that idea? That people have a sell by date? Do you buy into it even for yourself? Do you think it could form part of the basis for a mid-life crises and the reason so many people take antidepressants. If so, shouldn’t we be changing people’s thinking? Perhaps you are? If so how? This question applies to both males and females.

Inspirations would be appreciated too.

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26 Answers

GloPro's avatar

Well, I don’t really fantasize about old balls. Then again, I lift my boob from getting squished in my armpit every now and again.

talljasperman's avatar

I know a 65 year old woman that’s still getting some so no.

JLeslie's avatar

I live in Florida. Plenty of old people here having fun, including having sex.

El_Cadejo's avatar

@GloPro Lol that’s awesome. It’s like the female equivalent of making sure ya don’t accidentally sit down and squish a nut :P

anniereborn's avatar

Well, I am 45 and I do feel a whole lot less sexy than I did at 35 . i’m not sure if that’s because of societal issues though. My body is not in as good of shape as it was ten years ago. I can definitely relate to the boob scenario. It’s not pretty.

On the flip side, my grandfather acquired a girlfriend at the age of 80. And I believe (though I really don’t want to know by how much) they were pretty frisky.
A good friend of mine is in her 70s and I know she had a boyfriend with which they had some really interesting times.

Personally I would not want to be with someone who is 65 at this stage in my life, but as I get older the “older” people start to look good to me.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

Well, a cookie might still look edible after 7 days in the snack tray but it will no longer be soft and gooey. People in their 60s, and beyond are still having sex. A lot of women I know once they hit the ”Big ‘M’”, they don’t find the need or desire to boink as much. Certainly from a visual point it is lights out, unless they are regulars at the gym or in some high calorie, muscle toning activity. Yeah, I will say it, they are women but pass their prime visually. On average men hold their resale value longer but a lot of men are tore up from the floor up as well. From where I was in my youth, I have lost way more than I wanted, but I am not sloppy like a bunch have gotten.

anniereborn's avatar

@Hypocrisy_Central Why do you think men “hold their resale value longer” ?

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

@anniereborn I have been told by a few women that in their eyes men of the same age as them or friends of theirs appear to be younger by 5–10 years; sometimes greater. I guy who is 52yr would appear to be only 45yr.

ucme's avatar

What’s the phrase, “Many a tune was played on an old fiddle”
I have my own term, “You don’t look at the mantlepiece when poking the fire”
The thought of having sex with an old woman kinda makes me gag, but that’s not to say they lose the right, none of my business.

Cruiser's avatar

I’m 53 soon to be 54 and you will get slapped if you even suggest I am “over the hill”. I am just as active, fit, able and sexual as I was when I was 25. 50 for many is the new 30…I can still KSA and take names and take great pleasure still doing the activities I enjoyed doing in my 20’s.

That said I do not cringe when some respectful soul calls me sir…I have earned that title and do realize I am qualified by my age to receive AARP benefits.. I am living at that age of James Bond glory and enjoying the finer things in life I have earned from hard work and attention to detail as far as health and fitness is concerned. I take my aloe juice shaken not stirred!

BeenThereSaidThat's avatar

Only in wine and meat.

zenvelo's avatar

Hmmm. My experience with women in their fifties (and one in her sixties) is that the fires may be banked, but they’ll burst into flames with the right tinder. The women I know are much more sure of themselves and know what they want from a lover.

So, to answer the question, many don’t get past their prime until they’re shuffling into the grave.

STD rates in seniors is actually quite a concern.

Coloma's avatar

People are capable of enjoying their sexuality forever, as long as health concerns do not put a wrench in the works, so to speak. haha
That said, however, at 54 now, after a lifetime of enjoying my sexuality, now that the hormones are depleted my libido is not what it used to be. I’m sure it could be resurrected under the right circumstances as @zenvelo mentions, but, facts are facts, once the estrogen and testosterone wanes, the desire is just not what it used to be, and I’m okay with that at this stage of life.
I think our cultures emphasis on sexuality is over rated, sex is the frosting on the cake, but the cake itself is the basis of relational nutrition.

Another thing rarely talked about amongst older woman is the fizzled out orgasms that accompany post menopausal shifts.
Where once they were explosive and breath taking they are now much diluted.
It’s kinda of a ” Was that IT?” scenario. lol
Of course, for me, the sexiest thing ever that ignites my libido is a meeting of the minds, a cerebral connection that boosts the body parts into action.

Stimulate my mind and the rest will follow in short order. :-)

pleiades's avatar

Yes I do. I watch sports.

SadieMartinPaul's avatar

Some people are “past their prime” when they’re still teenagers. Obesity, substance abuse, criminal records…it’s so possible to give up on life before it’s even started. This is a very tragic and distressing thing to see.

On the other hand, I know people in the 90s who remain in the best years of their lives. Their bodies may have grown weaker, but their minds are sharp and engaging.

LuckyGuy's avatar

Like fine wine, my dear. Like fine wine.

ucme's avatar

Sarcastic grin

LuckyGuy's avatar

<— Ignores expiration dates on almost everything.

Coloma's avatar

@LuckyGuy Just keep your nose and ear hair trimmed before you expire. lol

LuckyGuy's avatar

and an occasional buzz cut below.

Adagio's avatar

@Coloma I’ve always considered the brain the most important sexual organ.

Coloma's avatar

@Adagio Agreed, I don’t care how good looking a guy is, if he has the IQ of a corndog no go. lol

Haleth's avatar

Seriously, why is society so bent on judging how sexy someone is? It’s like the LEAST insightful thing you can say about a person. When I was younger, I used to get catcalled, and now it’s stuff more like, “get out of the way, fat bitch!” And it’s like, why is my (lack of) sex appeal relevant to some random stranger? I’m never going to bang that person. I’m young, but it seems similar to the stigma women get for being older.

If you call out someone for being fat, old, or in some other way not measuring up to an ideal of feminine beauty, you’re basically saying, “You’re in my plane of vision. How dare you look like that!” As if women OWE it to society to be attractive and decorative.

Men get to age and be judged on their accomplishments, not their looks. I want the same for women. Individual sexiness is only relevant to you and your chosen sex partners. When guys say stuff like “Yeah, I will say it, they are women but pass [sic] their prime visually” (@Hypocrisy_Central)... well, it’s really none of their damn beeswax.

Cruiser's avatar

@Coloma shot over the bow…I will be using this quote of yours in the future with or without your approval…
“IQ of a corndog” LMFAO

Coloma's avatar

@Cruiser Haha..hard to find a guy that can match my wit fer sure. Permission granted….loaf of bread is another fav. coined by yours truly. ;-)

Cruiser's avatar

@Coloma Box of rocks and Eskimo Pie were well worn and corn dog seems more fitting with the times we live in! Happy Sunday darlin! ;)

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