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Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Have you ever been so exhausted that death doesn't seem like a bad alternative?

Asked by Adirondackwannabe (33875 points ) April 13th, 2014

Friday I woke up so tired I wouldn’t have minded giving it up. It gave me an idea of why terminally ill people get ready to go. Don’t worry, it’s just my job. It’ll get better in a bit. But that is one wacked feeling. Have you ever felt anything like that?

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21 Answers

Dog's avatar

Yes… and yes and yeah.

I am on the down-side of caring for my mom- she fought cancer and kicked its butt for quite while- she returned to a normal life for a while even after the doctors told her she should go home and had a couple weeks to live- she was so tenacious. Ironically she outlived the young doctor who diagnosed her…

A few months back she got sick again and we lost her this time- way too young. In the last few weeks I have often felt as you described. Tired and wondering what is the point.

What is interesting is that, with some time a spark of something interesting and good comes along and I am so happy to be alive again. I suppose if we all get a chance to really refresh our souls we will be able to sustain the sparks and kindle a blaze for life again.

SQUEEKY2's avatar

Oh shit yeah.

chyna's avatar

Yeah, the days I spent at the hospital waiting for my mom to die. 10 long days, but I’m sure the days were too short for her.

Mimishu1995's avatar

Oh yes. My high school time.

I lost count of how many times the thought of suicide came to me…

It was just so stressful, and full of conflicts, from everywhere. Too much for a tiny growing mind to cope.

I don’t know how I did survive until this day…

CWOTUS's avatar

I don’t know about exhaustion, but I recall some times when I’ve had food poisoning before:

First you feel like you’re going to die, and then it gets worse… and you only wish you’d die.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Mimishu1995 Hey, no thoughts of suicide. You mean a lot to me. I was just beat to almost the end. I’m better now.

Mimishu1995's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe Don’t worry. I’m at university now. High school time passed long long ago and it’s just something I don’t really want to remember…

Smitha's avatar

In the past, yes. Right now? No.

GloPro's avatar

Death has never seemed like a good alternative to me. I have wondered if I have 60 more years of such monotony left in me. Maybe being bored to death is my end.

Symbeline's avatar

Physically, no. When I’m emotionally and physically exhausted, yes, lying down and having a nap is more welcomed than anything else. But not death. Cuz if I was dead, I wouldn’t be able to enjoy the relaxing nap. and I wouldn’t be able to feel the soft pillows and blankets

I’ve felt miserable and sad and angry enough many times to wonder if death might be worth it, but I couldn’t have been serious, as every time that thought came to me I ended up turning to something that would get my mind off of everything, like games, movies and well, booze. That last one is probably not the better option lol, but what can I tell you.

Jonesn4burgers's avatar

I have tinnitus. The ringing, buzzing, etc. kept me awake for days sometimes. I got so sleep deprived I hallucinated. What’s more, once I did sleep, it wasn’t over, it repeated. I was so exhausted, yes, death seemed my only solution. I wasn’t suicidal exactly. I felt death would be rest, and seemed my only way to rest, but I was a teen; I didn’t want to die. Even when I did sleep, it wasn’t restful. Once I dreamed my brother was so tired of how I behaved because of the nerve shredding affliction, he stabbed me in the ear to end the problem. The dream was so realistic, I heard the “bloop” of blood fill my ear after the ripping, grating sound of his pocket knife forced into my ear. I could hear myself scream, and the sound shut off in that ear when I was stabbed, and only continued in the other ear. I could feel the warm, wetness of blood as it oozed from my ear, down my neck, and how it cooled as the air hit it.
THAT is so exhausted you can welcome death.

ragingloli's avatar

Many times.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

Exhausted by life, yes. I would welcome a permanent sleep.

hominid's avatar

Following my immediate onset of central sleep apnea in November of 2012, I went through a period of such extreme sleep deprivation that I would struggle to breathe throughout the day, hallucination-like experiences were common, I was unable to form sentences, I would struggle with the simplest cognitive tasks, and I found myself staring at my hands wondering who they belonged to

ucme's avatar

No, never, that’s all I got on this one.

zenvelo's avatar

Never been that tired. But back in my drinking days there were more than a few times when I was that hungover.

cazzie's avatar

Um….. Exhausted in the sense that I didn’t want to face another day of what was happening in my life and that I wouldn’t have minded a car or bus hitting me so I could spend some time in a hospital ward just sleeping and resting,,..... Yes. Knowing that I was in desperate need of a rest at what ever cost because I didn’t think I could going at the pace I was going…. Yes. But not checking out full time, really. But, there were times, when I wouldn’t have cared injury or death, I guess.

Cruiser's avatar

Heck yeah! Aside from sleepless night because of a sick kid….I have had bouts of insomnia where I didn’t sleep for 3 night in a row.

Espiritus_Corvus's avatar

The last year of my marriage was like that. I didn’t really care if I awoke in the morning or not. I just went through the motions of living. I would go to work then come home and go staright to bed. Spent all weekend in bed. I ate sparingly, lost a lot of weight. I only spoke to other people if I absolutely had to. You couldn’t have a conversation with me, I just didn’t want to be around people at all. I developed one helluva stammer. Five people very close to me died that year as well, many of whom shared intimate thoughts and moments only we were aware of. And then suddenly it all had just evaporated as if they and our experiences together never happened. I got rid of my handgun. If I had been on a highway and suddenly a car came at me head-on, I really don’t think I’d have done anything to avoid the crash.

I’ve been in pain where I actually envied the dead. Once during a bout of severe food poisoning as mentioned above, only I was on a soloing a yacht from one island to another. Once on the Baltic we were caught in a winter storm, forty-foot waves on a 300-foot ferry. Once when an artery blocked up, (the brachial—inside left arm). I’d had two heart attacks, a broken leg, broken ribs, some burns, and a bunch of other injuries up to that time, but nothing compared to the constant, throbbing pain of that blocked artery. It took four hours to get to the ER. I actually saw red as if I was looking through a red filter. If I had been alone on the way, I probably would have been screaming the entire time.

cazzie's avatar

@Espiritus_Corvus I think I speak for more than one of us here on Fluther that you are certainly who we would love to meet in person the most and share a drink, a meal and some stories. <3

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