Social Question

wundayatta's avatar

Do you prefer to spend your time flirting, or in more intense interactions with people you interact with socially?

Asked by wundayatta (58321 points ) April 22nd, 2010

Some people seem to enjoy relationships that rely heavily on flirting. Other people seem to enjoy a more private but intense kind of interaction. Part of it, I’m sure, has to do with the circumstances—whether you’re in a relationship or not, at work, at play, how much time you have, where you are (say supermarket vs in a restaurant, vs sitting next to someone on a train). But overall, whether online, or in person, do you find yourself leaning more towards one style or the other? How do you account for your preference?

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30 Answers

Sophief's avatar

I’ve done with the flirting, bagged myself the boyfriend. So I need other conversation. Flirting leads to sex, and I have no interest in flirting with anyone else. So when out on my own, I keep to myself.

Cruiser's avatar

I prefer in your face intense interactions over flirting any day!

liminal's avatar

I do enjoy some intense flirting from time to time. Yet my default is interaction that tends to be thoughtful. edit: Which can be playful or serious, dependent on the circumstances, like you say.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

I enjoy alittle of everything but absolutely love a good laugh with someone.
I like to be happy :)

DarkScribe's avatar

I like both – see no reason why you can’t have both at any time with anyone. The world is not black and white. (Unless you prefer to eat Dog Food.)

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@DarkScribe -That’s right,Buster! :)

phillis's avatar

If I weren’t married, my natural propensity toward intensity would prevail in romance like it does everwhere else. When I get silly, people who don’t know me think something’s wrong! That, alone, is a great source of amusement to me :D Bahahahha!!

ucme's avatar

I love to flirt, with women friends I hasten to add.There’s a mutual understanding that it’s not leading anyway just shits & giggles tremendous fun.Most of the rest of the time we all just have a laugh basically.I am serious when the need arises ocassionally,honest.

stranger_in_a_strange_land's avatar

I’d rather keep things formal; flirting terrifies me because I can’t understand nonverbal cues and can never figure out the “rules”. It just seems to me to be skating too close to an accusation of sexual harassment. I’d rather spend my time alone, but if I have to be around other people I’d rather keep things formal and straight to the point.

OneMoreMinute's avatar

I always love to playfully toss a few words around with my friendly and funny/punny friends.
I prefer sunny conversations over drama-problems-crises-bitchin-complainin-drainin topics any day.
Small talk makes my skin flake off from the dryness, and I think it yellows my teeth!!!

My #1 favorite topics are ones that help me to understand the hidden mysteries of life and how everything works together. My latest cherry topic is Quantum Physics thinking.

I don’t flirt with anyone, although another person may see that I am. I might seem flirty to them, but I’ve always been naturally outgoing and jokey-kidding, getting my laughs on, not my rocks off!

thriftymaid's avatar

More intense interactions with the person I have been flirting with.

wonderingwhy's avatar

Both, I really don’t see it as an either/or, it’s more of a scale whose value at any given moment is based on circumstance. I guess though, I really play it by ear and adjust based on how I feel the person is responding. Most often I’m perfectly happy to let them lead the way. If I have to pick, I shamelessly flirt, mostly because I enjoy it and the other person usually gets a kick out of it, but then I can’t really say no to a deeper conversation, nor would I want to! In the end I want the other person to feel comfortable and have a good time whatever our interaction.

judyprays's avatar

I like both. I think this question has to with where someone is on the introvert / extrovert spectrum. Generally, introverts get energy from intimacy and extroverts get energy from many surface interactions.

slick44's avatar

I like both as well, its fun.

Love_or_Like's avatar

Interaction I like to talk to the person…..

john65pennington's avatar

Too old to flirt.

Still young enough for interesting conversations.

Can one still lead to the other?

slick44's avatar

@john65pennington… nonsense, your never to old.

shadling21's avatar

I don’t like flirting per se, but I do enjoy more light-hearted conversation. I’ve found that after 2–3 hours of solid, intense conversation, I become very tired. I need a bit of playfulness or humor to break things up.

beautifulbobby193's avatar

Flirting is a complete and
utter waste of time unless it leads to some form of sexual activity.

BoBo1946's avatar

@wundayatta do both…different people require different circumstances! For my special s/o, more private…for others, more open and extroverted on my part. In other words, i tend to be full of bull!

evandad's avatar

Flirting is fun. An ego stroke. A cheap thrill. I’ve always enjoyed it. I also enjoy more personal communication, but it’s has to be real. I don’t like being personal with casual friends.

Trillian's avatar

I’m really not into flirting. I keep conversation to topics that interest me. I can enjoy lighthearted banter, puns and laughs with my friends and complete strangers for that matter, without ever flirting.
The truth is, I really don’t know how to flirt. I’ve been accused of flirting a couple times and honestly had no idea what the person was talking about.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

Flirting is flirting but interaction is living, to me. I want to feel like I’m living every day and not just making endless plans for “someday”.

aprilsimnel's avatar

Though I’m friendly, I’m not sure if I flirt. I’d have to ask a friend to watch me and report. I certainly don’t have “intense interactions” socially when it’s just a piss-up down the pub!

Silhouette's avatar

I like laughing. I keep my interactions with most people on the lighter side.

Aster's avatar

I’m worn out from flirting. Too much of it. Besides; for women of a certain age it can look ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS. Even HIDEOUS.
Therefore, knock off the BS . (yawn)

zen_'s avatar

I just noticed that I’m like that with one person, and it does enhance my feeling of the relationship, my perception of it.

Crossroadsgrl's avatar

I like flirty but intense…I like/prefer relationships but also get that people need to feel good on their own in order to be in them happily
Flirting casually I suppose is fun…but I’m so darn goal-oriented I’m not sure of the end result lol

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