General Question

lostinyoureyes's avatar

How do I gain more depth as a person?

Asked by lostinyoureyes (1121points) September 24th, 2014

How do I develop a deeper understanding of life and of myself; to learn to enjoy music, books, and films that have more substance; to have conversations that go a little further; to become a better writer?

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13 Answers

talljasperman's avatar

By being yourself and not doing anything you suggested in the details for the wrong shallow reasons.

hominid's avatar

What is motivating your desire for this change? Why not consume music and films that you like? Are you dissatisfied and feel that happiness would be possible if you were only like someone else? First, I’m not sure that’s possible. Second, you’re likely fine exactly the way you are. If you want to learn more about you, pay close attention to you. What are your deepest intentions and desires? What do you enjoy?

Seeking to change your personal taste and interests in hopes of finding fulfillment and happiness will likely find you in this trap.

lostinyoureyes's avatar

Because I no longer find enjoyment in the things I have enjoyed in the past.

I suppose I also see increased depth as increased knowledge and understanding.

Maybe I’m framing my question wrong. I don’t mean I want to be more sophisticated or join some elite culture. I just want to understand and know more.

@hominid You have good points though. Based on what I said above, it looks like the motivation is the search for happiness.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

Reading and listening to those around you.

Blondesjon's avatar

Fake it until it becomes true.

thorninmud's avatar

Do difficult things, things you’re a little afraid of. Put yourself in one challenging situation after another. This is where deepening happens. It’s where you understand life and yourself. The experience of working through challenge, coming up against your own resistance and pushing through, equips you to understand challenging artistic work and complex ideas, since these are the product of people who go beyond the easy.

janbb's avatar

Reading a really good newspaper like The New York Tiems daily will enhance your knowledge of the world and its issues. Special sections like the Tuesday “Science” section will broaden your understanding and give you more substantive topics to discuss with others. Your vocabulary will improve as well if you look up words you don’t know.

KNOWITALL's avatar

I Found more depth came with reading about the Holocaust, slavery & other atrocities humans forced on eachother.

ibstubro's avatar

Travel. Near and far, it will bring you new perspective.

Reading. When I was young, I would take 3 books at a time from the library: a fiction, a non-fiction, and and a (auto)biography. When all were read, I would return and repeat. The books weren’t chosen randomly, but to my interests.

Volunteer. The really young and the really old are the best. Preschool and nursing homes. All the depth is there to absorb.

Never ignore the “uninteresting”. Therein lies your best chance to advance. If you take @janbb‘s advice, concentrate on the articles that seem to not interest you. They hold information you didn’t need to know, information you didn’t know, introduce idea’s that you’d not considered, or are garbage, and you know that.

Depth comes from constant soundings.

rojo's avatar

Volunteer. There are many organizations out there that need your help and will help you get out of your comfort zone and into new, eye-opening environments.

LostInParadise's avatar

Join a discussion group. Book clubs, for example, have become fairly popular. Barnes & Noble stores sponsor some and you can probably find more by doing a Web search. I find that social interaction can be a strong motivator for thinking more deeply about something, and contact with the ideas of others may take your thinking to places where it would not have gone otherwise.

ibstubro's avatar

I forgot “Listen”.

You can train yourself to discern the content of what you are hearing, and that is essential to communication. #1, you have to fully understand the information you have at hand (whether you agree or disagree at first look) before you can take a position.

Speech is almost singularly human, and was the most important for evolution. If you can open your mind and understand what other people are communicating to you, you’ll be deeper than you can imagine.

LDRSHIP's avatar

Step out of your comfort zone.

Sometimes listening, reading, or watching will not suffice. You also need to do things to fully grasp, appreciate and understand. Experience it for yourself and do it. Some people don’t have that luxury.

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