General Question

The_Inquisitor's avatar

What do you think of a relationship between 2 people who are almost 10 years apart?

Asked by The_Inquisitor (3163points) July 14th, 2008

Does age difference really matter? If the guy is older by about 8 years, is that too weird for a relationship? What’s your opinion? How old is too old?

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19 Answers

La_chica_gomela's avatar

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the relationship you described. As long as both people are consenting adults, I think it’s great that people have found happiness.

My boyfriend (a fellow flutherer, it so happens) is 10 years older than I am, and it doesn’t make any difference at all. I would have never known he was older until he told me. We’ve been together for almost a year, and we couldn’t be happier.

marinelife's avatar

I think it may make little difference, or it may be really significant. What determines that is where in life the 8-year difference comes.

If you are 15 and the guy is 23, the eight-year age difference is light years, and the relationship has almost no chance of success.

If you are 27 and the guy is 35, the 8-year difference is probably not going to be an issue at all.

chatnoir's avatar

Well, funny you should ask. When I was 50, I was volunteering in a hospital, while waiting to be assigned to a mission by my church. I am a pretty traditional person, however, I met a male RN who worked in the ER who was 11 years my junior. We both love sports, the out of doors, animals, and we shared a faith. It was rather embarrassing at first, but we have enjoyed 10 years of a very happy marriage, so I guess I think it is a great idea, if the person makes your heart sing, the years don’t matter.

La_chica_gomela's avatar

That’s a wonderful story chatnoir. I agree wholeheartedly.

Mangus's avatar

Yeah. I’d go so far as to say that the question doesn’t have enough pertinent information. There are so many different real working “non-standard” pairings in the world that just naming an age difference doesn’t really say much.

Put another way: statistics might make is seem less likely, but every relationship has to be judged on its own merits.

babygalll's avatar

Age is just a number. If you are happy and in love age shouldn’t matter. As long as you aren’t with someone who is old enough to be your father, grandfather or great grandfather. My parents are 10 years apart and have been together for 37 years.

anonyjelly16's avatar

I would think: “there’s two people who love each other.” If I thought any less, that would reflect more on my own preconceptions and cynicism than it would about their relationship.

(I’m assuming you’re not a minor because you have a fluther account)

Zaku's avatar

The possible issue isn’t someone being too old – it’s one of them being in a young state when the other isn’t, especially if the other is trying to take advantage of the difference in experience or trying to re-do their high school romances or something.

Seems to me age becomes only an issue in people’s heads generally after the early 20’s sometime. Some people hang on to age stigmas their whole lives though, and those ideas can interfere.

cheebdragon's avatar

If you think 10 years makes a difference, try 20 years…..

But let’s keep that on the down low

dragonflyfaith's avatar

As long as it’s legal.

At some ages you might have problems with having things in common but later on that’s not such an issue.

My grandparents were 10 years apart, but they met when they were both adults.

nina's avatar

Go for it! (As long as it is legal, of course)

Knotmyday's avatar

If you guys are compatible, why not? However, the fact that you are asking (to me) shows that there may be another underlying concern that needs to be addressed. If something about the situation leaves you feeling unsure, it’s probably time for a little introspection and reevaluation. It may be that you’re just not ready.

scamp's avatar

This is a great question. My Father was 10 years older than my Mother, and they did just fine. but as was mentioned here by others, it depends on the stage of life you are in. Marina said it best.

I will run shrieking from this thread if someone mentions Tim Curry, by the way. But we all KNOW it’s coming….

babygalll's avatar

Don’t we know it scamp!

charliecompany34's avatar

ok, so they’re 10 years apart. he’s 40; she’s 30. yeah, it can work. try to get past the notion when he was 10, she was still getting diapers changed. once you enter adult stages of life, adult issues and matters apply whether you’re 30 or 40.

ninjaxmarc's avatar

I have a pretty good relationship with my goddaughter, she’s a newborn.

We love each other, it could work

bridold's avatar

I think it may have to do with the age of the two individuals at the time. Like a 10 year old and a 20 year old would be awkward.

Then again, my sister was 17 when she married her husband who was 30 at the time and they have the absolute best relationship out of anyone I’ve ever known. (She is now 30)

shrek_king86's avatar

I think that it does have to do alot with the people in the relationship because i know of some relation ships with gaps bigger than the 10 years apart and they have worked out great

cheebdragon's avatar

Age is just a number.

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