Is alkaline water really better for you?

Alkaline water is an old school, temporary remedy for gout and acid indigestion. And that is about it. It is quickly becoming another, cure-all health fad and is retailing for an outrageous 22 bucks per 33 ounce bottle. There is even a in-line machine now that looks like a swimming pool chlorinator that will produce alkaline water from tap water for $2,500,plus the cost of the bicarbonate of soda you have to continually dump into it.

Don’t get sucked into this. That machine is destined to end up in some sucker’s garage a couple of years from now gathering dust next to all the bread makers and other shit people have wasted their money on over the years.

You make your own Alkaline water for pennies. Here’s how:

Get some baking soda (also known as bicarbonate of soda) and mix a heaping table spoon of it into an 8 oz. glass of regular tap water. Add the juice of one squeezed lemon. That’s alkaline water. Drinking baking soda mixed with water and the juice of one squeezed lemon can somewhat help raise or balance your pH levels, while neutralizing the uric acid causing gout symptoms —temporarily.

As to acid indigestion, one glass will convert the acids in your stomach into gas, then you burp and feel better.

Ta-da! You just saved yourself a bundle. And if you don’t feel any beneficial effects over a few weeks, it’s no harm, no foul. There are no harmful effects to drinking alkaline water.

Yeah it’s holistic bullshit

Nope.

Oh, thanks. I was wondering if eating too much acidic stuff (orange juice, tomatoes, etc., even coffee) might catalyze certain harmful reactions (some chemicals react more readily in acidic conditions) and cause bad problems like DNA breaks and cancer. And that maybe alkaline water might counteract these.

Nope. Eat your oranges in peace.

Why would you ruin good booze by watering it down? Alkaline water… some people.

Thanks, @Rarebear!

@2davidc8 And if you care about the science, I’ll tell you why it doesn’t matter. Your stomach secretes hydrochloric acid for a reason—it has marked antibacterial properties. Many bacteria can’t live in acidic environments so it kills the bacteria. After the food leaves the stomach the acid gets naturally neutralized by bile so it can be digested.

Drinking alkaline water will do nothing for this. The only thing alkaline water will do is force you to spend your hard earned money in useless places.

Thank you, @Rarebear, what you said about the role of bile is very comforting!

A million years of evolution has got you covered.

@RocketGuy The reason I originally asked the question is that I seem to eat a lot of acidic foods: fruits, orange juice, tomatoes, oil-and-vinegar salad dressings, even coffee is supposed to be slightly acidic. And years ago, I drank a lot of Coke (yes, I know, not good), which has phosphoric acid. I was wondering where all that acid went.

@2davidc8 Even Coke is fine if drunk in moderation.