Social Question

Indigogirl332's avatar

Should I tell my long distance boyfriend I'm on my period? (Please answer)

Asked by Indigogirl332 (4points) June 26th, 2018

So, this guy and I haven’t been dating long (about a month) but we’ve been friends for 6 months now. We pretty much tell each other everything. I get really moody and mad when I’m on my period and I’ve snapped at him before while I was on it. I honestly want to tell him but I don’t know if I should or how he will react. We have talked about a lot of personal things and he isn’t a baby about stuff but periods have never came up in discussion. I don’t want to keep making up excuses for being rude or really emotional. I just don’t want things to be awkward between us. Should I tell him and if yes, how do I tell him? And if your a guy how would you react if your girlfriend told you she was on her period?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

29 Answers

rebbel's avatar

“Ah, by the way, my period started today/I’m awaiting my period.
Thought I’d just tell you, because sometimes it can make me a bit cranky, or moody, or both (or words that tell exactly what your symptoms are).”

JLeslie's avatar

I wouldn’t bother, but you can if you want.

pcekeyper88's avatar

It is a good idea if it prevents conflict in the relationship.

Darth_Algar's avatar

With these words – “I’m on my period”.

You’re a female. You’re going to have periods. That’s simply a fact of biology. If he cannot accept that then find some guy who can.

pcekeyper88's avatar

This is not about excepting women who have periods. This is about preventing conflict in the relationship and preventing misunderstandings. Relationships are hard as is.

Darth_Algar's avatar

In the TC’s words:

“I honestly want to tell him but I don’t know if I should or how he will react.”

“And if your a guy how would you react if your girlfriend told you she was on her period?”

Dutchess_III's avatar

Hm. I’d work on controlling my moodiness for at least the length of a phone call. If he comments on it, then you may mention it. As it is, he may not even notice a change in your behavior so you’d look pretty silly offering that information out of the blue.

KNOWITALL's avatar

Same as @Dutchess_III said, chill out and be nice to your bf.
Or talk to your doctor and get some xanax.

If you are cognizant of the problem, it’s YOUR problem to deal with, not his. No need to tell him anything. You fix yourself.

kritiper's avatar

Are you two engaged in phone sex?? Are you afraid you’ll get pregnant?? Otherwise, why tell??

Jeruba's avatar

“I just get in a bad mood sometimes. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be so cranky. It’s not your fault. I’ll be fine in a day or two.”

He’s smart enough to figure it out, don’t you think?

Dutchess_III's avatar

@kritiper She’s concerned about PMS getting in the way of their “relationship.”
I like @Jeruba‘s idea. Most men are way not comfortable with confronting periods head on. I say drop a hint and hopefully he’ll figure it out.

MrGrimm888's avatar

Sure you can tell him. But it could remove legitimacy from your future rhetoric. If you have a legitimate concern, but are on your period when talking about it, he may think “well, she’s just on her period.”..

Dutchess_III's avatar

It’s not anything I would mention.

kritiper's avatar

@Dutchess_III If a guy knows ANYTHING about women, he knows this PMS thing will come up sooner or later.

MrGrimm888's avatar

^That’s true. From my observation, I think it must be terrible for them (females.)

I saw a couple episodes of “Naked and Afraid,” in which the female didn’t have access to any medication. One girl was literally lying on the ground crying, in pain. I had not been aware, before seeing this, how crazy it could be for a female…

It’s interesting that evolution hasn’t lessened ANY of the things that human females endure. PMS, is probably nothing to carrying, delivering, and breast feeding any number of offspring.

As a man. I feel like, in some cases, we (men) got the better gender deal. Maybe that’s because I’m not strong enough to be a woman. I just can’t imagine how my life has gone, and adding periods, and child bearing, and general maintenance required by the female reproductive areas.

Thank god we have chemicals, to make that monthly curse more tolerable, and pregnancy less painful and more successful.

To the men dealing with a lot of girls. I recommend keeping chocolate around. When they are on their periods, chocolate helps. I worked with mostly females in a medical environment, for almost 10 years. Chocolate may have saved my life. I would bring some in to work when I knew the girls were on edge. The tension would reduce…

I always try to be supportive, or stay away… Sometimes there is no right way to be, around a female having PMS.

I don’t like the way women act sometimes, due to being a woman (they don’t like the way we act, due to being a man.) But I try to respect the reason. Hormones…...

Adagio's avatar

Interesting, down here in the far distant antipodes we have periods, we don’t (get) on periods. Do you ride them?

MollyMcGuire's avatar

You really smell like a troll.

JLeslie's avatar

That PMS thing that every guy knows it will come up, give me a break. No one ever knew if I was getting my period or had my period until I was a few years before menopause, and even then I think it wasn’t so much cyclical, but more of a general higher anxiety time that I’m not even sure was caused by menopause I had so much crap going on in my life.

For 35 years of menstruating I didn’t have any PMS. Not every female has that syndrome. I did have cramps the first day of my period, that was the thing I had to deal with.

I’m not saying PMS isn’t a real thing, it is, but let’s not cast that across all women. It just feeds into women being more hysterical and moody. Some women deal with PMS, some don’t. Everyone, including men, have something they deal with.

kritiper's avatar

@JLeslie It’s a crap shoot.

Dutchess_III's avatar

If a guy knows ANYTHING about women, he knows this PMS thing will come up sooner or later.” Not necessarily. I have found that if there is a disagreement between a couple, the men tend to chalk it up to PMS, thereby negating whatever the woman is trying to express. Unless they’re tracking our periods (ha ha!) how are they to know when it’s come up?

Men are just ridiculous about it. When I was about 16 I was speeding along at about 45 in a 30 in my home town. It was nighttime. Cop pulled me over. I saw him get out of his cruiser and walk up to me, and at the same instant I saw an (unused) Tampex in the passenger seat. I quickly grabbed it and threw it in onto the floorboard in the back.
He came up with his flashlight and suspiciously said, “What did you just throw in the back?”
I felt myself blush, and I mumbled, “Tampex.”
He blushed too and said, “Oh.” Didn’t pursue it any further.

KNOWITALL's avatar

@JLeslie Agreed. I hate the ‘poor female is PMS’ing and out of control’ stereotype. It’s been the excuse for ‘hysteria’ all the way to a ‘woman can’t be President’, nope that’s just bs that little girls perpetuate to be brats.

MrGrimm888's avatar

Well. I wasn’t saying that females are crazy (cough;)

Just that I had no idea how bad it could be for some girls (PMS.)

KNOWITALL's avatar

@MrGrimm888 haha, well some are, but not sure that has anything to do with PMS! Plus you men usually say the crazy ones are better in the sack, at least my guy friends do…lol

Yes, a lot of women seem to have unreliable cycles, like normally I’d say I’m a 30 (between 1–100) as far as being bothered in any way with it, but some women get it bad, like a month at a time or never stopping. I can’t even imagine living that way, must be terrible.

MrGrimm888's avatar

Yes…. Crazy chicks are a thrill in the sack. It makes up for a lot. Eventually, it grows tiresome (taking care of them.) I have had multiple girls like that. Even been stabbed with a broken beer bottle…

KNOWITALL's avatar

@MrG I kinda gathered from your posts haha!

kritiper's avatar

I guess it’s just a matter of believe it or don’t.

MrGrimm888's avatar

It’s a vice, and I can’t stop @KNOWITALL . When I stop posting here, one day, you can bet I’m in jail, or dead because of my unquenchable thirst for red heads/crazy women…..

Adagio's avatar

@MollyMcGuire Was that me you were referring to as smelling like a troll? Really? Okay…

Edit: No, maybe you were referring to the poster, yes, I think you were…

Answer this question




to answer.
Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther