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Ilovelistening3's avatar

What should I say?

Asked by Ilovelistening3 (15points) 2 months ago

My long distance boyfriend is great, but he doesn’t call me. Hedoes text everyday but I think calling is more personal. I called him and he didn’t pick up and I texted that I was just calling to say hi, and said he was working at the time…but never called back. This bother me so I mentioned he never calls and he said he would try sometime this week to call. Which made me angry because I don’t understand why he has to wait for a day this week instead of just calling today. I’m angry and I don’t know what to say

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17 Answers

RedDeerGuy1's avatar

Maybe he has unlimited text and not unlimited cell phone long distance. He might have a cheap phone plan.

Ilovelistening3's avatar

I wish that was the case, but he told me he has unlimited calls.

Mimishu1995's avatar

Why do you need him to call everyday?

He has his own life to tend for. He’s got work, personal matters… I think you do too. You are not the only one in his life.

You should be grateful that he tries to set his time to call you instead of being angry. He’s doing that because he cares for you and wants to have time with you despite his work.

Give him time and space and appreciate texts as well. No guy likes a girlfriend who wants everything to revolve around her.

chyna's avatar

@Mimishu1995 She said he never calls, only texts her.
I find that odd that he never calls. I would have a talk with him about that and if he refuses to call at all, maybe find another boyfriend if that is a deal breaker for you.

snowberry's avatar

Some people just do not like to talk on the phone. I agree with @chyna.

LadyMarissa's avatar

I suggest that you say NOTHING & simply learn to accept him JUST LIKE HE IS!!! Now, IF it bothers you to the point of obsession, I’d suggest leaving him for somebody new who DOES appreciate you in a way that YOU need!!!

Afterthought…are you sure that he’s not married???

mazingerz88's avatar

It’s better imo to accept in good faith that he prefers texting than talking to you everyday. My guess is there will be days when he wouldn’t even text.

All this doesn’t have to mean there might be something going wrong with the relationship.

You both need and deserve to have your space, whether you’re close or far-apart.

elbanditoroso's avatar

Say good-bye.

First, Long Distance Relationships tend to die and die ugly. Sure, there are exceptions, but the success percentage for an LDR is appalling low.

Second, you aren’t going to change him. Either you have to change (and live with it) ort take a hike.

Third, pressuring him is not going to work. It is going to come right back and bite you in the ass.

RedDeerGuy1's avatar

I would say nothing. You don’t want to come off as clingy. It might just be temporary as he eazes into a new job. I have family who only talks on the phone and does not like to text or Facebook or write.

Adagio's avatar

Apologies if I am wrong but something smells a little fishy about this, wondering if you are the same person who posted this and numerous other questions along the same repetitive line… Again, apologies if you are not the same person.

Kardamom's avatar

Long distance relationships are bad from the get go. You need to be with people on a day to day basis to have a real relationship. Why are you in a long distance relationship? Did you meet online? I don’t have a lot of faith in those types of relationships, because you cannot truly know someone, or know whether you have “real” feelings for them, until you have met and have lived your lives together on a day to day basis.

I would find it very odd if the person I am supposedly in a relationship with had no desire, or claimed too be to busy, to talk to me in person on the phone.

Something is not right here.

One of my closest friends was catfished. It sounds like that might be what is happening to you. This is how it started. She met him online. He sounded like the perfect match for her. They texted and texted and she fell in love with him. He said he was in love with her. The problem? They had never met in person. They kept texting back and forth for almost 9 months. He claimed to live in England. Ultimately he said he wanted to meet up with her and come to the States. The texting continued. On the day that he was supposed to arrive at the airport in the U.S., she got a text from him saying that there was a “mixup” in customs and he needed X amount of money to get out of the airport. That’s when she smelled something fishy. She texted him back that she didn’t have any money to help him. That’s when he disappeared for good after 9 months of texting back and forth, and my friend believing that she was going to meet the “love of her life” and he was going to come to the States to be with her. Nope, he just wanted her money.

Why was the catfisher willing to devote 9 months of his life to my friend, when all he wanted was her money? Because he had the same scam going on with multiple women (this all happened on Match.com if you were wondering) so it was a game for him, that paid off big time when some of the women actually wired him the money. It was a sick thrill for him, and ultimately he got money from some of the women. It didn’t cost him a cent to continue to pretend that he was in a relationship with these women. He probably got a cheap thrill from it, and ultimately got a lot of money from the women who were gullible enough to wire him the money.

Kardamom's avatar

I forgot to mention that he was using a fake name, so it was impossible to track him down, after the fact.

LuckyGuy's avatar

I thought most young people preferred to text rather than call.
In my case I’ve found that every time the phone rings it interrupts me from doing what I was doing – be that eating, working, watching TV, sleeping, using the bathroom, reading, fixing the mower, even talking on the phone to another person. I am always doing something else when the phone rings and I do not like the interruption – even if I am doing something distasteful like taxes.
A text takes a few seconds – as long as the other party does not keep the conversation going back a forth over nothing. I do not care to hear how a friend’s first cousin’s daughter is arguing over how many bridesmaids she should have.at the wedding in June. If I get a text, get the idea and will respond.when I am near the phone, not driving, have clean hands, have my glasses, am not doing something dangerous, and can sit down. That is only a limited number of hours per day.
A text session should not be a long string of why questions or long statement. Transfer the info. Say what needs to be said and don’t drag it out.

rojo's avatar

I prefer text to phone and he does contact you every day so he must still have some feelings for you. Learn to deal with it if you want the relationship. But, I understand that sometimes it is nice just to hear his voice. Every once in a while text him and ask if you can call now.

janbb's avatar

Have you ever met in person?

Inspired_2write's avatar

Say Goodbye and stop returning his calls/texts.
Here’s why..see link.
https://www.crackingthemancode.com/what-to-do-when-a-man-ignores-you/

found this online today, which may help you to understand.

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