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Anonymousgirl88's avatar

What’s your opinion? (This is an update to the very 1st question I posted on this web site, asking if the story seemed sketchy- Jess’s story).

Asked by Anonymousgirl88 (176points) May 30th, 2019 from iPhone

So new update- Jess wanted me to post this because she’s REALLY stuck now- Basically, he started getting more controlling, yelling, telling her to answer phone calls right away when he calls. It started out like,
“Jess. Why do you not answer the phone when I call, then call back like a minute later?”
As @KNOWITALL stated a while ago- he knew people who have each had toxic people in their lives, who that turned into abusive and controlling relationships.
(He doesn’t tell her which family members and friends to hang around yet).
But her and the guy signed for an apartment in February, she made the mistake of signing the lease
(now it’s a trap and she’s stuck with him on the lease for a whole year).
At first, he was being weird, he gave her keys, borrowed her lab top for work, but one day she asked if she could use it when he was out for the weekend for a work conference
(since she had the keys).
He became controlling and said,
“No! No one is aloud to go there when i’m not there,”
a couple of her close co workers told her,
“That’s weird. I would look into that and trust your gut. You don’t wanna be in a situation where your stuck. I would get out, before it actually happens. Seriously, I had an ex who started stalking me and breaking into my stuff,” she thought it was a coincidence both her co workers said the same thing.
A couple days later, she found out that his friend signed the lease too, but she was informed it was only for extra income, so that they could even get approved for the apartment. The other girl and him did like each other in the past, but she talked to other girl and it was confirmed that she was just a friend. But now basically, her parents don’t like him because of his money problems and they don’t approve of the fact that she signed the lease, since it’s a year long contract, they are the type of parents who don’t approve of living together before marriage. Plus even though the other girl is just a friend, they still don’t approve of the fact that he had to use his friends credit to help them. As I said before, her track record with men isn’t good at all, her mom knows that and her mom goes,
“Three strikes and your out.”
Basically, ALL our friends still think she’s gonna be the “next” baby mama, if she continues and we all are worried because we see him doing something to her
(I know I mentioned the dark topic before)
and we all don’t want anything bad to happen to her.
One of my friends told her a month ago,
“I really don’t want anything bad to happen to you Jess and if something ever does, don’t hesitate to tell. You have a great support system. I’m just saying, don’t be stupid, it may come around to bite you in the ass and you won’t be able to take anything back. And I know your mom is down your throat, but she is the last person who wants to see anything bad happen to you. We all tell you things for a lot of reasons and we know your doing what you want, but take it from people who have been through really bad sh** to help you out,”
even the girl on the lease seems so nice, letting her know she is putting herself in danger, if she chooses to connect with him and how it’s more she is enabling him.
She asked him two weeks ago, if they were still talking and he said,
“Not right now,”
then last week they got into an argument, he said,
“Let me get my stuff together. I need space. You need space. That is what we agreed on,”
she asked how long, he replied saying long as it takes, then she asked for what and he said,
“Space Jess.”
And she has a new job, two of her co workers she’s close with at her new job asked her how her situation is, she explained complicated, they BOTH said,
“Well it’s gonna be your decision, but I would get out now while you can. You never wanna put yourself in a situation where your stuck.”
Input? What COULD possibly be the next “stuck-like-stituation”
she very well might get into??
And do you believe he’s gonna end up contacting her again soon or that they will talk again soon somehow?? I just wanna hear everyones inputs.

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4 Answers

zenvelo's avatar

Tell Jess to ghost this guy. And if she doesn’t, you and your friends tell her good bye and cut this drama out o your lives. No one needs this.

Inspired_2write's avatar

Check the lease agreement .
If one of the leaseholders leave then the other on the least is to pay for the whole rent per month.
Leave before he does , if he has not already done so to you? Talk with a lawyer now on how to get out of that apartment after only 4 months there.
Also if the management won’t allow you to leave and hold you to the lease agreement, then see if you can find another person to take on the agreement and live there. All management is concerned with is that the rent is paid on time , they don’t care who lives there , as long as its kept clean etc

Kardamom's avatar

Wow! This was so long and complicated, I could not follow it.

jca2's avatar

Me neither, @Kardamom.

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