General Question

tinyfaery's avatar

Why am I such a bad looker?

Asked by tinyfaery (42587points) September 24th, 2008

I am horrible at finding things; my wife can find things in a flash.

Example: Last night I was looking for Q-tips. I looked in the place they would usually be, but I could not find them. I asked my wife is she knew where they were. She said, “there in there”. I said, “no, I looked”. She got up, went to the cabinet, and pulled them out.

What’s wrong with me? Do you, or did you ever, have this problem?

Oh, and ‘looker” is my term to refer to looking for something. So please don’t attack my grammar.

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28 Answers

osullivanbr's avatar

You’re a guy. I think we’re all like that. Aren’t we?

EmpressPixie's avatar


I, um, thought this question was going to be about your attractiveness level.

My boyfriend is a horrible “looker”. We say he is just not perceptive. I think it has to do with being able to scan an area versus only seeing the specifics. He cannot scan anything—an area, a letter, a book, whatever. It’s not something wrong with you so much as you haven’t learned whatever ability it is that let’s us scan and pick out certain things from a crowd of other information.

Don’t worry about it. Just make sure you have perceptive friends and spouse!

tinyfaery's avatar

I’m a guy?

El_Cadejo's avatar

haha im the same way. I was the kid that was like “Mommy i cant find it” “I swear if i get up and come in there and find it your going to be in trouble.” Yea, it was always right in front of my face but i could never see it.

Strange thing is when other people are looking for things they cant find i usually spot them pretty easily

Celeste00's avatar

I agree with the guy thing. I recently called my bf “such a man” cause he was doing the same thing.

EmpressPixie's avatar

@tinyfaery: we scheduled you for a sex change last week. it happens to everyone on the internet at some point. you can change back if you fill out the proper forms in triplicate.

Judi's avatar

I am a girl and I’m a bad ‘looker” too. I think different people are different kinds of lookers. I can scan words and pick concepts and things out really easy. My husband can’t. He can look at a diagram and figure out exactly how to put something together and I don’t get it at all. It just depends on how you’re wired.

Zaku's avatar

Yeah, I’m a guy and a pretty good looker (in both ways), and have known women who were bad at finding things and have gender-switched that same scenario, even with her getting mad at me for looking where she’s already looked, before I produce what she’s looking for from where she’s just looked.

A few things can cause this, but the main and most interesting cause, to me, is that we all (and animals) to some degree think we are experiencing what is really in the world, when what we are really relating to is largely in our imaginations. If you think you know that something is or is not somewhere, you can actually seem to have the experience of not seeing something that is there, or seeing something that isn’t there, or seeing something or someone that isn’t who or what you think they are, or having people say things they didn’t actually say, etc. We really mostly relate to our understandings, not the actual sensory input itself.

tinyfaery's avatar

Zaku That is a great answer. I think you are so right. I do tend to live in my “own little world”; I’m a dreamer; I live in my head. My wife is very much a realist.

osullivanbr's avatar

@tinyfairy. Let’s not worry about the sex change, well unless you want to, in which case knock yourself out. I would feel kinda bad if you did have to go through with it though, just based on the fact that I don’t look at who’s asking the question.

Look, to make amends, I’ll go halves with you on the sex change. Can’t get fairer than that.
Note to self: Look at the asker, Look at the asker, Look at thr asker. OK I’m set now

tinyfaery's avatar

No problem.

La_chica_gomela's avatar

My SO and I are the same way. We’ve even had that same conversation about Q-tips. I think it’s just one of life’s little oddities…

jamzzy's avatar

i refuse to look at the other answers because i too have the same problem and i get SO mad when i cannot find things.

Knotmyday's avatar

I’m a terrible looker. I stand and stare into the fridge for things that everyone else finds right away. It’s frustrating.

trumi's avatar

Usually when I’m looking for something I have a set image of it in my head, and if it doesn’t match that exact image I’m totally lost.

augustlan's avatar

I’m a good “looker”. I can find things for other people, even if I don’t know what the item looks like. It’s a gift.

MacBean's avatar

@tinyfaery—To stick up for osullivanbr a little bit, I know you’re female, but I still think of you as a “guy.” To me, being a “guy” is a state of mind, and doesn’t have to do with what’s in your pants. And guys do things like… look right at the Q-tips without seeing them. :D

tinyfaery's avatar

Well McBean, I can’t say you are totally wrong. But I do wear make-up, I am scared of spiders, and I do listen when people talk to me. :)

Judi's avatar

I’m feeling enlightened. Maybe now I can see those damn q-tips!

MacBean's avatar

So you’re a girly guy. My favorite kind! ;)

tinyfaery's avatar

Ha ha ha. You made me laugh out loud. I refuse to write LOL.

Knotmyday's avatar

hee hee hee, you wrote it. But I’m with you, I’d rather FOL

El_Cadejo's avatar

speaking of looking for things i think “Oh it was in the last place i looked” is one of the stupidest fucking sayings ever. If you found it why the fuck would you keep looking. No shit its in the last place you looked.

Judi's avatar

uber, could you use a little more creativity in your vocabulary? That hurt to read.

tinyfaery's avatar

Mitch Hedberg?

Like that knot?

El_Cadejo's avatar



Judi's avatar

much better!

Knotmyday's avatar

Still sad about Mitch. :^(

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