General Question

TenaciousDenny's avatar

How long were you with your significant other before you dropped the 'L' word on him/her?

Asked by TenaciousDenny (1144points) May 4th, 2009

…and what would you consider as ‘too soon’?

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43 Answers

AstroChuck's avatar

By our third date we were stone cold in love. We told each other at the end of the evening.

willbrawn's avatar

I told her I “liked” her right away

TenaciousDenny's avatar

@AstroChuck Wow, that’s impressive. It takes a lot of guts to put yourself out there and say it, but it’s an incredible feeling when both people are feeling the same thing.

I’ve been dating my current girlfriend for almost two months now, and I’ve dated enough of the ‘wrong’ girls to know that the right one has finally come along. I haven’t dropped the ‘L’ bomb yet, though.

AstroChuck's avatar

Of course, I may have misunderstood the question. I’ve never called my wife a “lesbian.”

Facade's avatar

It was a couple months in. He took a little while longer

willbrawn's avatar

@astrochuck I was thinking the same thing

jbfletcherfan's avatar

It didn’t take very long. It’s too long ago to remember the exact time frame. But I do remember we said it at the same time. :-)

knitfroggy's avatar

I think it was about a week, or 7 dates…we were crazy nuts for each other. We also got married after 6 months…so we are kinda fast movers!

aviona's avatar

With the first one we were saying it before we were even dating because we were such dear friends.

The second was about a….month into the relationship. He said it to me at an intersection as we were parting ways. He was going straight and I was turning left. He shouted out the window and I completely stopped in the middle of the intersection! Good thing it was like 3 AM and there was no one else on the road!

The third was probably a few weeks into the relationship. It was pretty bad actually. I was at a rave with some friends, ahem, on ecstasy. I called him and told him in a voicemail that I loved him. Errr, but didn’t I love everyone that night? He called me the next morning and said, “I love you, too.” I was like, what? (Didn’t have much memory of saying it), but then I recalled it. It sounds bad, that that was the first time I said it, but I really was in love with him.

Annnd the most recent, wow. I remember it happened really fast and both of us were trying to fight it because we thought we should slow down. Finally one day (it must have been like a week into the actual relationship), he was stumbling over his words a lot and finally blurted out “Fuck it. I love you.”

ubersiren's avatar

3 months. I was very cautious.

peyton_farquhar's avatar

Him, after five days of knowing me.
Me, about a week and a half after that.

Glow's avatar

around 3 months. I actually said “I think i love you” than a month later, after a fight, he decided to let me know…. but he did accidentally say it one time, lol.

Too soon? Hm. Maybe the first time you meet them?! How can you love some one you dont know? You can have strong feelings for them, im sure.

This also all depends on every ones individual definition of what LOVE is.

funky_princess's avatar

Im not entirely sure how long we had been going out but i do know for sure he said it first well his exact words were ‘i think im falling in love with you’ But i didnt feel the same so i couldnt say it back to him! It wasnt that long into the relationship i know that. I think when you know your in love with hem tell them whether its only been a week or whether its been a few months. At the end of the day there isnt any such thing as ‘too soon’ its when you feel comfortable to say it to them after you have noticed you feel it.

westy81585's avatar

Haven’t done it with the current S/O yet.

The last one (and one of only 3 I’ve said it too), it took about 5 months.

I don’t say it until I mean it.

casheroo's avatar

Well, we moved in together after a week of dating. He told me he loved me shortly after I moved in. It was actually super romantic.

funky_princess's avatar

@casheroo not judging you at all here but were you not scared to move in with him after only knowing him a week? Surely you knew next to nothing about eachother? Im fasinated and would love to know more thats all

casheroo's avatar

@funky_princess No, we knew each other for about six months, but had only been dating for one week. We weren’t dating at all during that six months, he was friends with a guy I was dating. So, I trusted that it’d be alright to move in. :)

funky_princess's avatar

o ok! thanks for being honest with me and answering my question :)

theartfuldodger's avatar

l word as in love? 1 day!

it was mutual – we’re married nao

TitsMcGhee's avatar

I said it casually after about a month, but seriously after about three. And by casually, I mean that I didn’t say it in the context of “I’m in love with you,” but more like “Oh, you like that movie too? We are so alike! I love you!”

miasmom's avatar

It happened around a month and a half after we started dating. But, I did say, Let’s go to Vegas on our first date, we always joked about eloping after that. I knew he was the one on our first date, we got engaged 3 months later and married 3 months after that.

AstroChuck's avatar

By the way, everyone, I love you.

kate1746's avatar

Probalbly 9 months, and i thought i meant it at the time- looking back though, i don’t think i really maent & new it until 1 1/2 years. All off the sudden, i realized, i might give my life for this person.

filmfann's avatar

My wife to be told me after our first date. I waited till we had dated 8 months. That’s when I felt it.

Lothloriengaladriel's avatar

I think I said it after about a month or so, I probably wasn’t really sure at that point and the feelings weren’t mutual but I’d rather be told the truth then have someone lying about something so.. precious (for lack of a better word) Its not a wise thing to say unless you really mean it.

kate1746's avatar

Most of you guys new within (to me seems like) a small amount of time that you loved your significant other.. It seems weird to me that i took so long. Is that a bad thing?

miasmom's avatar

No, everyone knows in their own time, there are alot of other factors that play into it…prior relationships, age, distance, time spent together, etc. Everyone is unique and that’s ok.

hug_of_war's avatar

A month, month and a half. We promised we’d take things slow…but that obviously didn’t happen :)

chyna's avatar

@AstroChuck Thanks, I haven’t heard that in wayyy too long.

jessicar's avatar

In almost every relationship I said it within weeks which is way to soon. I always fall hard and quick, but I guess so do the guys that i’m with because I never say it first. :)

cak's avatar

My husband is the only guy I ever said it to before they said it to me. I knew he was it, rather quickly. I always dragged my feet, found a reason to never to say, “I love you” to anyone else, but I gotta say – when it came to my husband, it was just an natural.

We started dating in December, in March we both said it, I just said it first.

ems's avatar

1 year.

girlofscience's avatar

Depends on what is meant by “with” here.

If “with” means “knowing each other”: 3 years.
If “with” means “sleeping together”: 6 months.
If “with” means “being in a relationship”: -1 seconds.

We were friends for 2.5 years and then began sleeping together. As it turned out, on exactly the 6-month anniversary (to the day) of sleeping together, he told me he loved me. I said the same, and 1 second later, we decided to be in a relationship.

(It just took us awhile because we were both weirded out by the fact that we were sleeping together, since we had been just-friends for so long. We both finally got over it!)

bright_eyes00's avatar

the last guy i was with…he told me right away but i’m a little bit more hesitant to expose those kind of feelings with a guy. currently, my friend/interest knows i’m sure that i’m in love with him because of how i act but he wont hear the words from my mouth, not until i’m sure he feels the same way at least.

3or4monsters's avatar

2 weeks. It’s been some 10 years since.

La_chica_gomela's avatar

I met him on a Friday, and blurted it out on Saturday. No regrets.

TenaciousDenny's avatar

Thanks for your stories everyone. I have a trip planned to Chicago with my lady on Memorial Day weekend, and I think I will drop the bomb then. Do something all romanticlike.

shortysith's avatar

one of two times i’ve said it: first time, I said it four months after we began dating (he said it first); my most recent relationship prolly a month after dating (we were together for six years after that)and I knew I loved him a week after meeting him…I always felt like it was said too soon in all my relationships so I am holding off for a LONG time. But sometimes you just know! :)

Sloane2024's avatar

I told him I loved him after 3 and 1/2 months. I believe that in order to truly love someone, you must see all aspects of them. If they’ve been angry, sad, hurt, or upset and you still feel the same way about them, you still love them regardless of how they’ve acted in each circumstance, then I believe you genuinely love them. That’s my definition, anyway.

sakura's avatar

Instant love at first sight – across a smoky pub!!

Within a couple of days, I got the courage to say it out loud showed our love 1st!!!!

ohmyword's avatar

I’m crazy about my SO but not entirely sure if I’m in love with him. It’s a difficult thing. Entirely personal as well.

LeetaLuminate's avatar

after we got close and then we felt that way

justme1's avatar

before we became a couple I think, we were friend for a few months first

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