General Question

hug_of_war's avatar

Was it weird for you when your divorced parent(s) remarried?

Asked by hug_of_war (10725points) July 25th, 2009

My mom just got engaged a few weeks ago, the wedding isn’t for a year, but it’s so weird to me. My parents have been not living together since I was 14, and I’m 21 now so I have no ill will about it, but it’s all kind of strange, the idea of potentially living with my stepdad if I’m still living at home, having an adult stepsister I’ve never met, having my mom have a different last name from me, etc.

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9 Answers

augustlan's avatar

My mother remarried many years after the divorce, when I was already married and had kids of my own. I didn’t particularly care for the guy, but other than that it wasn’t a big deal. My dad (actually step-dad) just remarried this year, and I was absolutely thrilled for him! He’s found the love of his life, and she’s a wonderful person, so it’s good.

When I remarried about a year after my divorce, my kids were a little sad about the idea of it, and lobbied for me to keep their last name… but they love my husband, and loved being a part of the wedding.

Darwin's avatar

My nieces and nephew were quite happy that their dad remarried after the divorce, to the mom of one of their best friends. For a long time they wished their mother would remarry so she would quit bad-mouthing their dad to folks at school and church, but then the guys she picks have not been much fun to live with. However, so far, all have been smart enough to not marry her after all.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

My parents are still married but I just wanted to say that it must be hard to have it all thrown at you but you must remember that your mother is her own person and can take actions that will affect you but for her benefit

whatthefluther's avatar

My parents separated over 30 years ago but never divorced for financial reasons and seem fine with the current arrangement. Had they not already had two homes when they separated, that probably would not have been possible. And neither has ever suggested a desire to marry again, so I have never been in the situation you face. But, I’ve always thought that the best for all was whatever brought them each happiness, without any consideration on how that might affect me.

ShanEnri's avatar

Don’t remember my biological father, but from what I’ve heard about him I’m glad my mom remarried! It’s not so bad, but then again I was younger than you are now!

fireinthepriory's avatar

I definitely wasn’t thrilled… But I had pretty good reason, in my opinion. My parents had separated about a year and a half earlier, and then my dad died ~6 months after that. It seemed a little intrusive for my mom to be getting married so soon after that, even though I knew that she hated living alone and loved my stepfather. I also didn’t (and don’t, for that matter) get along with my stepfather all that well. Plus I was 12, and everything sucks when you’re 12. :)

OpryLeigh's avatar

My mum remarried in 2008 almost 11 years after my parents seperated (and then divorced). It wasn’t weird at all to be honest. What was weird was a few years ago when she moved her new boyfriend (now husband) into the home that had just been Mum, my brother and myself for so long. I got over that pretty quickly though and was expecting her to marry him. He’s a nice guy and mum seems very happy. That’s important. She wasn’t happy with my dad and so I’m glad they didn’t stay together.

fundevogel's avatar

it was weird to think of my parents getting more than me.

star_bug's avatar

yes it does feel wierd! I’ve been through it twice! Sorry.

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