Social Question

tytyslim's avatar

Has anyone been secretly jealous of a good friend?

Asked by tytyslim (65points) February 16th, 2010

I have a friend who has it all; The house, The car, The fabulous clothes, The significant other, The great job. While I on the otherhand have none of the above. Its not that I don’t want my friend to have, or to continue to get because he deserves it all. I just wish my hard work would yield some fruit and I could experience some of that good
p.s please don’t think I am a hater, lazy, or severly insecure

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13 Answers

JONESGH's avatar

jealousy is natural

Likeradar's avatar

I don’t think there’s a damn thing wrong with how you feel.
Remember though- what looks like an amazing life may not be. There very well may be things in your life that your friend is jealous of.

Tenpinmaster's avatar

I think its natural to feel envious of the “haves” and being a “have not” is not so much fun. But you have to keep things in perspective. You have to remember that there are people that have it a lot worse. This is how I see the social scale: The Haves, the have nots, and the have nones. I know how you feel though, there are friends that have a hell of a lot more in terms of what they are given and it is aggravating. I know i shouldn’t feel that way but I can’t help it.

shadowofdeath's avatar

my answer is another question : is there anyone who has never been jealous of a good friend?

MissAusten's avatar

Once in a while, I have felt that way about a friend. It usually wears off.

I had a really good friend in college (we were even roommates for a while) whose family had quite a bit of money. She was very pretty, very smart and funny, wore great clothes, had been all over the world, and had seemingly unlimited funds from home. She had a couple of credit cards that her dad paid off monthly without question. On top of all that, she had an incredible singing voice and landed fantastic roles in the drama department’s productions. I was jealous of her, but not to an extent that I resented her or thought less of her. As I got to know her better, the jealousy almost completely wore off. Her parents were a nightmare and she’d been molested as a child by a family friend. She had some serious emotional issues. No one has a perfect life, and it didn’t take long for me to feel that I didn’t want her life, even with the money and talent.

ChocolateReigns's avatar

Of course I have. Everyone has. My friend got a laptop when she was about 10 and a cellphone a few months ago. I have absolutely no chance of having either one until I’m about 16 or 17. But now I try not to let it bug me – I have a digital camera and an iPod, she doesn’t, it kinda evens out.

lilikoi's avatar

I’m wondering what this guy does for a living.

Berserker's avatar

I’m afraid I often find greener grass than mine, yes.

Supacase's avatar

Sure I do. I know material things aren’t important, but still… I want a house I love, a new car, nice furniture and clothes. I think about getting out of this house literally every single day. All that does is make me unhappy. Sometimes I envy the relationship my friends have with their husbands – my husband and I have grown quite distant. :(

It helps to remember that I’m sitting here in my warm house complaining about someone with a nicer house when there are people out there who have nowhere to live at all. I have a spouse I love who treats me with respect and kindness when there are people out there who are being treated terribly by their SO. I don’t have it so bad.

A_Beaverhausen's avatar

o yea, often. damn skinny bitches.

liminal's avatar

All the time, except for the secret part.

onesecondregrets's avatar

If he can have it, you can too. Maybe he’s just wired to be really good at being successful…some of us have to try a little harder, it’s what’s in your fate and all that jazz. I’m jealous of friends definitely, then again, surprisingly they sometimes end up being jealous of me for things I never would have thought of. It’s all natural in relationships.

OpryLeigh's avatar

I am envious it sounds nicer than jealous of a few of my friends but I always try to remember that you never know what goes on behind closed doors and just because there lives appear to be perfect, doesn’t always mean that it is. I think it’s perfectly natural to feel a little jealous of people you know from time to time and, providing that you don’t let it interfere with your friendship then it is harmless. I often joke with friends about how envious I am of certain things in their life and they often look shocked and tell me that they are envious of something in my life.

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