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ucme's avatar

Worst thing to say on your first day in the army?

Asked by ucme (45952points) September 23rd, 2010

Some utterly inappropriate remark guaranteed to get you beasted or even kicked out altogether. Answer any way you see fit. Tenshun, begin!!

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

32 Answers

TexasDude's avatar

Oh, be sure to establish dominance over your drill instructor on the very first day. They love that. Aggression is what they are looking for!

talljasperman's avatar

do we have any white flags…? just in case.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

Sooo…who’s gonna bend over?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Is don’t ask don’t tell still in affect?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

bat your eyelashes at your new drill sergeant Would it be wrong of me to lick you right now?

Cruiser's avatar

Hey Gunny…was that you that just farted that condom on the ground??

El_Cadejo's avatar

kicked out all together? well ya could always go full metal jacket on em :P

sakura's avatar

Didn’t I see you last night at the Pink Palace??

Rarebear's avatar

No thank you sir! I prefer sheep!

thekoukoureport's avatar

HELLLLOOOO SEXY!

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

Haven’t I seen you at the Bear Cave Bar?

Michael_Huntington's avatar

Is that you John Wayne? Is this me?

downtide's avatar

(to the drill seargeant) Well don’t you look hot in uniform?

WestRiverrat's avatar

Who took my copy of Mein Kampf?

josie's avatar

My bed is uncomfortable..

thekoukoureport's avatar

stare at his pecker and wink(no need to say a word)

filmfann's avatar

Does this Camo make my butt look big?

Zyx's avatar

Worst thing? You’re going to regret posing this question on the internet.

Sir! If you turn your back for even a second I will take your gun and track down your family sir! I will cook them and FIND a way to make you eat a stew made from them sir! If you have any attractive female relatives you might find some sperm in there too sir! That will really save me money in my archaic salt based system of currency sir!

Army people really hate archaic salt based sytstems of currency.

WestRiverrat's avatar

@Zyx I actually had a blind date with my Drill SGTs daughter, didn’t know ‘til I walked her home at the end of the date what her last name was. Good thing it was the end of the cycle or I might still be doing pushups.

Zyx's avatar

@WestRiverrat Yeah but I assume you tried to contain the situation. Can you imagine taunting him with it? Mailing him photos of your butt and a tangled mess of legs?

Berserker's avatar

Tell him to shut up. Simple as that.

woodcutter's avatar

i want to talk to the cocksucker in charge

iammia's avatar

Could i be excused please, there’s this massive sale on in Selfridges?

Could i pick you up something while I’m there? Some nice Uggs to go with that shabby uniform perhaps?

poisonedantidote's avatar

To quote my friend Fernando, when asked “why did you join the army?” he responded “to fire a bazooka and get my driving license”

Mat74UK's avatar

Stand with your back to everyone else then say “Sorry, force of habit from my years in the French army!

Jabe73's avatar

Trying to be serious here your first few days (in the army) will be spent in a reception battalion where you are not dealing with actual drill sergeants, (for the most part and they are more lenient at this point) until you get transferred to your actual training company. Calling your drill sergeant “sir” usually will get you dropped. Any decent recruiter would warn you of this ahead of time however.

As far as getting “thrown out” there are very obvious things you can do if for some strange reason you would want that.

downtide's avatar

@Jabe73 calling a sergeant “sir” is a bad thing? I thought you were supposed to call everyone sir if they outrank you?

Jabe73's avatar

You were never in the military I am assuming, I was. You do not call an NCO “sir”. That is for commissioned officers only. You call them by their actual rank. You would call your drill sergeant by that name, drill sergeant.

downtide's avatar

@Jabe73 nope, never been in the military and never wanted to be. Even if I wanted to, they wouldn’t accept me on medical grounds.

Jabe73's avatar

@downtide Just a friendly warning in case you ever gave it a second thought.

thekoukoureport's avatar

They would say “SIR! I work for a living g-dammit! You call me by my earned rank… Drill seargent! Is that clear?”
“Yes drill sargent!”
“I can’t hear you”
” YES DRILL SARGENT”
“NOW drop and give me 20”

partyparty's avatar

Could I have a more comfortable pair of shoes please?

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