Do you want to practise some British slang?

this sandwich is ace!
(awesome)

my knickers are smelly.
(underpantssss)

that’s bloody awesome
(really, very)

Well, I don’t know.

This idea seems about as mad as a box of frogs

——
Phrs. Of a situation or person, totally crazy.

that book is janky.
(messed up, ruined/trashy)

you’re so dense.
(obtuse, stupid)

I like this thread :)

Ah! I just remembered a good one: air biscuit.
It’s a fart.

Weird right?

I feel like a bloo’y mil’ bo’‘le.

Wow, it’s tough to type Cockney… and I don’t know what I wrote even means anyway.

Don’t be a donut
(idiot)

< < adds janky to his list of cool, with-it words to try and use in everyday language.

After knocking up a mate I left my flat then took the lift down to the where I parked my lorry. I couldn’t get it to start so I retrieved the torch from the boot. I opened the bonnet and had a look but I couldn’t see anything wrong, not a sausage.
Bloody ‘ell!

My last boyfriend was a total muppet.
(silly, non-intelligent)

Oh, and a few of the basics…

boot = trunk of a car
bonnet = hood of a car

rubber = eraser

fag = cigarrette.

Chav : ‘gangster’

wellied Adj. Drunk, intoxicated.

I couldn’t think of how to use this one in a sentence ~

rubber = eraser? that could cause some issues in places it means something else…

“Do you have a spare rubber?”
“WHAT?!”

it means condom some places

Shagged, knackered : tired

empresspixie!

hahah i was thinking the same thing

When i was younger, i did refer erasor as rubber… somehow i learn it was wrong

and someone in this thread say somethign else… well

wet the baby’s head
Vrb phrs. To celebrate the birth of a baby with a drink of alcohol or more usually an excuse for a drinking spree. E.g.“Congratulations Bill! How about we go out tonight to wet the baby’s head?”

I would suggest not taking this one literally, you might get in trouble

I think she’s AC/DC, that’s bloody ace! I’d give all my ackers to see some action with her!!!! (oh, you just made me remember my days at the british council!)

the other day I happened upon this way-out thread that was spewing brittish slang out the wazoo so I did some chalk and realized that this thread is sexpense short of a shilling.

translation:
I found this crazy tread that was spewing slang out the butt so I did come cocaine and realized that this thread is absolutely batty. I mean, wacky.

and also, I think skin flutes are ugly.
(penissssss)

We used to get totally blitzed after a pint of guiness and round of darts at the irish pub, that was so book, you know, back in the day :D

—-

whoa. Whoa! WHOA!

@mea05key, how exactly did you get empresspixe‘s name to appear in a monospace font in your quip?!?!?

—-

empresspixie

Let me try again

No i cant remmeber how i did it… i was surprise myself when i look at the font..

mea, it’s a mystery!

I ran up the apples and pears to nick my sister’s jumper, then ran back down for a cuppa.

Translation: I ran up the stairs to steal my sister’s sweater, then ran back down for a cup of (tea or coffee.)

Or how about: (music, please) Me father is a dustman, he wears a dustman’s hat, he wears coor blimey trousers, and he lives in a council flat.

Translaion: My father is a garbage man, he wears a garbage man’s hat. He wears ‘omigosh’ overalls, and he lives in a government apartment.

“Don’t get your knickers in a twist.” – Means don’t get upset about it. (Knickers = underpants.)

Said in a pub – “I’m just going to splash me boots.” – You figure it out.

It is easy Rob!

Use the @ symbol like you would the other ones.

“Girls, stop gassing!” Heard that many a time at school. Gassing means talking.

“Grub’s up” = Food is ready.

“The bill’s around, we’d better scarper” = The police are on their way, we’d better get out of here quickly.

“I’m bricking it” = Crapping yourself, though not litterally. Being scared.

“Put a bit of elbow grease in it” = Put a bit of effort in.

“I got an eyeful of the plumber’s crack when he was fixing the basin” = Saw too much of something.

“This milk is manky”. Manky = gone off/disgusting

Got a screw loose = Not quite right, like… “George Bush has a screw loose, in my opinion”

nice job, jp

JP
sweet

I also found this.

Hint: Hover over the link for a second.

AWWW BOLLOCKS!! or as i like to say awwwwwww balls

aneedleinthehayy smoked too much weed and experienced what is known as a whitey

i feel the need to share my new favorite British group Dan Le Sac vs Scroobius Pip

I always found it funny that British use “fanny” to mean a woman’s genitals. So you really don’t want to be telling the women there that you like their fanny pack :P.

@johnpowell – that’s awesome

i fahted.

i fahtit.

do i make you randy?

—

whoa, Nelly!

I’ve been wanting monospace typeface on here <em>forever</em>. (heh, looks like they don’t quite work with italics yet)

_ /|
\‘o.O’
=(___)=
̦ ̦ ̦ U ̦

(Now, if only the textile would respect multiple spaces when using monospace, we’d be well and truly set.)

Thanks, @jp. I knew we kept you ‘round here for a reason.

—

< < is jealous of jp‘s masterful textile kung fu.

OMG AWESOME! LOOK, I’M A TYPEWRITER

@rich – you need to stop. I am tired of GA-ing you for the day

@richardhenry, that’s cute… now say it in British, mate.

BLOODY BRILLIANT, MATE! I APPEAR TO BE A TYPEWRITER

Blimey!. You’re bloody well right.

One better Rob; I’ve made a recording for you.

Being English this is kinda funny. Have to say though, I Havnt heard of a few of these so called slang terms before

They usually call someone “crackers” instead of crazy.

They also say they need to “spend a penny” when they need to pee, because the public toilets cost a penny.

< < so wishes he had a British accent. Instead, he’s stuck with this.

Y’know what. I think to commemorate the discovery of monospace typeface on Fluther, I shall for now and evermore read it in my head with a bloody brilliant British accent.

Oh, those wacky Brits and their crazy language.

@jamjar: No, me neither. I’ve never heard “janky” or “wellied”, and “apples and pears” as an alternative to stairs also baffles me. :)

@Skaggfacemutt: Never heard or used “spend a penny” either. Crackers is correct.

@generalspecific: Never heard or used “air biscuit”. I might start though.

“Apples and pears” is an example of Cockney rhyming slang. “Spend a penny” might be an older idiom – I’ve heard it used by women in the north.

@janbb: Yeah, I guess it’s because I’m young.

Oh wow, how hasnt daft been mentioned yet.

Edit: dont you guys say maths too?

I’ve used/heard “Spend a penny” many a time.

Also, if you ever get called bonkers, you’re a crazy person.

@uberman: Yep, it’s Maths. Also trapezoids are called trapeziums.

trapeziums…hmmm interesting

Al-yoo-men-ium!

Or… Al-yoo-min-eyum. But I’m just being nit-picky. It nit-picking said in the US?

@RichardHenry – Apples and pears rhymes with stairs – just like your trouble and strife is the wife. Skin and blister is your sister

@tennis5tar yes, we say nit picky or nit picking

Almond rock = sock. My dad uses that all the time.

the William = bill at a restaurant.

Chevy Chase = Face

Lemon Squeezer is your husband (the old geezer). Ha-ha. And Daisy Roots are your boots.