General Question

Crossroadsgrl's avatar

What are guys 35-42 attracted to in a woman?

Asked by Crossroadsgrl (922points) December 20th, 2010 from iPhone

Meaning, what are you looking for in a woman that causes you to actually ask her out? honestly? Details….

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15 Answers

jerv's avatar

Highly variable.

Some guys calm down in their old age whereas others are overgrown teenagers who still want nothing more than a big rack and a nice ass. Not all guys mature as we age. It’s a good thing that I matured early and wanted someone smart, witty, loyal, and loving (as opposed to just good in bed) since I was 10 as I personally haven’t grown up much in the last few decades. I still play video games!

So there really is no single answer. It is as different within that age group as it is in every age group.

MyNewtBoobs's avatar

It varies quite a bit from man to man. Generally, if they’re interested in women, they’re looking for a certain set of genitals, but after that – who knows?

jerv's avatar

@papayalily Does that count the rare few that are into she-males?

MyNewtBoobs's avatar

@jerv If I’m the one defining their sexuality? No, I would call that more… alternative sexuality or pansexuality. I guess I think of straight as “only into the opposite cisgendered sex”.

jerv's avatar

@papayalily The reason for that digression is merely to illustrate that some people have different tastes in (and, in some cases, definition of) women.
Some people like sensitivity, some are gold-diggers looking for a sugar mama, some like eight inches and a C-cup…. there really is no single answer.

Scooby's avatar

Personally I go for women who don’t take themselves too seriously, who can still have a laugh & be open minded but still hold on to their dignity, well kept, be that in a casual or smart sense, no sweat suits though unless you’re just planning a day around the house…. I like a laugh so sense of humour is a must, she must be intelligent too, not to Mensa standards but some common wouldn’t go a miss…. I once dated a girl who thought Bi-polar was a cross between a grizzly & a polar bear, catch my drift! :-/
Needless to say, she had some issues……..someone who was general good company & not just all about themselves…honesty is a must, so too is sanity. :-/

Nice legs…

nailpolishfanatic's avatar

Their body, personality… at this time of age I would say that most guys are immature enough to stop being attracted to women just because of their boobs or how good they are in bed. I think first and most importantly is personality.

Summum's avatar

When I was that age I went through a divorce and got back out in the dating arena and I didn’t like it. I had matured enough that looks were not the most important though one has to be attracked to the other. I loved her eyes, her facial expressions, her humor and wit, how she carried herself and the fact she was the heart of her entire family. I have been married to her for 20 years now and couldn’t be happier with her.

Eggie's avatar

Personality and physical appearance…but I think more physical appearance.

filmfann's avatar

I think at that time in my life, I didn’t want to be around the crazy, lots of fun women any more. I was looking for a relaxed joy.

Zaku's avatar

Eyes. Spirit. Sanity. Strength. Joy of life. Humor. Intelligence. Health. Beauty.
The way she is. The way she relates to me.
Compatible viewpoints, interests, likes, activities, communities, spirituality, culture.
Absence of things I don’t want: Cigarettes. Alcoholism. Abusiveness.

crazyivan's avatar

I’m 34 so I reserve the right to change my answer in 3 months when I’m more qualified. I’ve also been happily married for 14 years so I’m largely just guessing at what I would be looking for.

Lack of drama is a big thing. By now we’re sick of dealing with all the childish BS which is why guys usually finally give up dating 20 year olds by 35. Somebody who is mature and knows that it’s too late to change them. Somebody who is not incessantly clingy but doesn’t swing all the way to being impartial.

As for actually asking out, approachability is obviously the key. This is my opinion and may be invalid, but I believe the best guys are the ones that are uncomfortable about asking you out to begin with. It’s like a job applicant that’s really bad in an interview. Might just be because he holds down a job for 10 years at a stretch. The guy who’s really good might have gotten that way by losing a lot of jobs.

The most important thing guys are looking at (those that aren’t just looking at your chest, that is) is “is this somebody that I can enjoy life with?” Somebody who is jovial, upbeat, active, passionate and optimistic trumps somebody who is sexy and depressing. How happy do you make me when I talk to you? How often do you make me smile?

I’d like to think that by 35 most guys have that figured out. I’m probably wrong. Short skirts and cleavage is probably the scientifically verified answer, but I’ll keep being optimistic.

Crossroadsgrl's avatar

Thanks SO much guys !!! :)

perspicacious's avatar

An age that starts with a 2

Paradox's avatar

“What am I looking for in a woman that causes me to actually ask her out”? Interest and effort on her part as well. Most guys do not like the blind approach. Women that let me know they want me to ask them out because there are too many other variables as far as looks/personality/interests go at least when it comes to me.

I’m not sure however if you’re referring to people that already are somewhat familiar with each other or not so I’m not sure how to answer this better. I’m a little under that age range but I’m close.

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