Social Question

deni's avatar

Ladies, why cant I get my bra straps to stay up? Ever?

Asked by deni (22853points) February 20th, 2012

Every single bra I own, aside from the ones that can also be fashioned into a cross-back (cause obviously then they cant fall down), the straps, I tighten them to be as small as they’ll go, but not only is that not enough, but they come UNTIGHTENED in ten minutes and then I’m left pulling my strap up and it’s annoying, embarassing, frustrating, and I don’t understand why it happens. Is it because I have an usually small distance between my boob and shoulder? I don’t frickin understand it. I have literally almost stopped trying to wear a bra normally, which sucks because the only ones I have that I can do the cross-back with, aren’t “nice” bras and I only wear them to work. Because of where the straps go when I do that, too, I can only wear them with normal t shirts so that leaves a lot of my shirts without a bra to be worn.

I have been trying to solve this problem for 10 years now. Does anyone else have this problem and have any solutions? Brands? Anything?????? Arr!

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32 Answers

marinelife's avatar

Have you ever had a good fitting with a bra expert? Often, women are buying the wrong size bra.

Go either to a lingerie store or to a high-end department store and ask when they are going to have fitter there.

She can solve your problem.

wundayatta's avatar

Why does it always take a man to solve a woman’s problems? ;-0

One word:

Super Glue!

deni's avatar

@marinelife I have, actually. I had one at Victorias Secret a long time ago, but my boobs haven’t grown so I assume she’s still right. And actually, I have tried different sizes just because I was wondering the same thing, and I’m pretty confident I’m wearing the right size.

JLeslie's avatar

Because you wear the wrong size most likely. If the back of the bra is loose, it slips up your back, and the straps get loose on your shoulder. If you wear a 36, you probably need a 34. Also, if your bras are inexpensive, they stretch over time much faster than bras made from better quality fabric.

Take a tape measure and measure below your breast around your back. Add 4 for better bras, so if you measure 30, you are a 34. Some bras you add 5.

JLeslie's avatar

Victoria secret bras suck.

deni's avatar

@JLeslie Oh you’re telling me! And the PRICES.

I will measure right now.

JLeslie's avatar

You should be able to raise your hands in the air, and not have to adjust your bra back down under your breast.

JLeslie's avatar

To get the cup size, with your bra on, then measure around the largest part of your breast around your back. The difference between your bra back size and the breast measure size is your cup. 1 inch A, two inches B, etc. But, that does not matter much, and is difficult to measure accurately because bras shape the breast. The important measure is your back size and then try on to get the right cup by tryng on. The cup should not be loose and puckering, but it should not be small where your boobs are popping out of it.

zenvelo's avatar

The best place to go to be measured and fitted is Nordstrom. At least that is what my girlfriend says.

deni's avatar

@JLeslie Ok so I measured both and according to my calculations I am the size I thought I was exactly. And I have tried so many different brands, AND some I find, as soon as I try on, I can’t even get them to tighten enough to stay up in the first place. And I just wonder to myself, who the HELL has this long of a distance between boob and shoulder? Am I deformed? What is the solution then? I have even tried those cheap stupid straps that you hook around the back of the bra above the normal clasp so that the straps can’t fall down. They are extremely inconvenient and I’m trying to avoid ever using one again.

wilma's avatar

Just wait a few years @deni, or have a couple of kids or something. Those suckers will drop a few inches on you right quick.

SpatzieLover's avatar

Do your bras have elastic in the straps @deni? It helps.

I had the same issues. I also used to buy only racer back bras for that reason. I’ve since found regular bras with elastic straps work just as well as the t-backs.

I think I also am “shorter” than average from the chest to the shoulder. With bad bras, where the straps keep slipping, I have solved that in the past with a quick couple of stitches through the strap & around the adjuster, after I have it set at the right spot.

You will definitely need to try some on at a store that sells a variety of brands. Once you find the style that works best for your shape, then you can buy them online.

I seriously read this Q a moment after I made an online bra purchase…this is the 2nd time I’ve done this on Fluther: read a bra Q after I bought a bra ;)

tranquilsea's avatar

I get re-fitted for bras every few years. When I was originally fitted I was a 34 D, this last fitting I was a 32 DD.

At those sizes I have to go to specialty bra stores (NOT Victoria’s Secret as their bras are cheaply made). As soon as I went down in chest size and up in cup size my bras stay where they are supposed to.

I spent a fortune on bras but they are very well made and last almost two years if I take care of them.

deni's avatar

@SpatzieLover Yes, I buy ones with elastic-y bands, they seem to fail just as much simply because even when I tighten them as tight as they go, it isn’t enough to begin with.

JLeslie's avatar

@deni I have to run, I’ll answer later. If you have a specific question you can facebook me I see that on my phone, I don’t fluther on my phone.

SpatzieLover's avatar

I also have to tighten them all the way. I think you may need to look at the bra adjusters for sale in the bra department, or online, as well. Either that or have them altered after you purchase them.

This type or adjuster of this type, may help. The last link is the type (not sure if it’s the same brand, though) that the dancers at my son’s dance studio use at competition.

syz's avatar

It takes a combination of things to be satisfied with your bra. A professional fitting is definitely a good idea, and then invest in a good quality bra (they last longer, anyway). I really like everything I’ve ever ordered from TitleNine.com (they’ve now split off their bra lines into Bounce)

deni's avatar

@SpatzieLover I have tried the ones in your first link. I really hated them. I liked the idea, but putting them on was a pain, and often they would pop off and just hang there until I could fix it. The second type, would definitely work, but the thing I’m trying to avoid is my bra straps showing like they would with a racerback bra. The straps get closer to your neck that way and with a lot of my shirts are then exposed, which is what I don’t want. Rrrrr!!!!!!

SpatzieLover's avatar

Yep, I get it @deni. You and I need to create a bra company ;). I have my straps set right now to just not showing out the neck of my sweatshirt. If I wear anything with a larger neck line (which I prefer) the straps show. Grrr is right!

In my youth, I found front closure bras to fit better for me. Have you tried any?

Now that I’ve had a kid, front closure is no longer a possibility.

EDIT: For working out, I found a Champion bra that doesn’t move one bit. It’s a pain in the ass to get on, but it works.

@syz, I’ve tried T9’s…they were expensive and well made. I was so hopeful they’d work. :( I’ve tried several styles. None worked. I did keep one workout bra, but it wore out quickly IMO.

deni's avatar

@SpatzieLover I wish I could just wear sports bras all the time, since they don’t move, but, obviously I like to have boobs occassionally!

No, I’ve never tried a front closure….I feel like I haven’t even seen many? Maybe I’ll go bra shopping today and see what I kind find.

SpatzieLover's avatar

I, too, HATE mono-boob ;) but i do love the stay-put-ness of the sports bras

Mama_Cakes's avatar

I agree with others, have your girls measured.

I had the same problem as you until I had them measured. Now, I can’t even tell that I’m wearing a bra. Awfully comfy and a properly fitted bra looks so much better.

john65pennington's avatar

Its because you are not using safety pins, like my wife.

She threw away all the safety pins and her bras.

She went to JC Penny and bought all new sports bras and loves them.

tranquilsea's avatar

It took me a while to come to the realization that I actually spend less money on bras, even though they are expensive, than I did when I was buying poorly fitting cheaper ones. I’d get sick of how uncomfortable and awkward the cheap ones were and buy another in hopes it would be better. The cost really add up over time.

Plus the expensive ones are often beautiful. That one is very similar to the one I’m wearing right now.

JLeslie's avatar

When I worked for a Wacoal they made petite bras, not sure if they still do. The straps fit better for people who are 5’3” and shorter, and those who happened to be proportioned shorter from shoulder to breast.

Does the bra band around your torsoe move if you raise your hands? Does the strap on your shoulder seem correctly adjusted, and then through the day loosens up?

Some people have narrow shoulders or more sloped shoulders, and even in the right size have trouble. Also, certain brands the straps are out just a little bit more on the shoulder. Lastly, if you buy convertable bras that have detachable straps, they usually have two places in the back to hook the straps only about an inch apart. You can hook the strap slightly closer to the center of your back without having to wear a racer back.

I actually often have the straps almost to the end of the length, the opposite of your problem, but have never been right at the end, and many shirts that have an empire type waist where the seem is supposed to be right below tye breasts, the seem is in the middle of my breasts. Everything is way to short on me, where it seemingly is long on you.

deni's avatar

@JLeslie I know what you mean about sloped shoulder, I don’t think I have sloped shoulders. My bras fit perfectly except for the straps….so no, they don’t move around if I lift my arms up or anything. Everything stays put and is comfortable….except for :(

JLeslie's avatar

@deni Ok. Hmmm. So the straps Cannot be made to fit tightly enough. Most people who complain about their straps falling feel their straps are fitting just fine when they put on their bra, but then the straps keep moving because the bra is shifting. Your situation is different. Best thing is to go to a store that does do fittings, because besides the measure they know how the bra should fit. I can tell when I hook a bra on a woman if it is fitting correctly by how much tension is in the strap when I hook it. The saleswomen who are good at fitting, should also know the various bras that might work. Bra straps can be made out of different materials, so one that is more elastic might help.

Try a bra boutique or a store like Nordstroms where they are well trained. Bras that are made well are usually $50 and up. Wacoal makes some that are a little less than that, and Wacoal has “fit” events at the major department stores you can try to go to also, besides the regular sales people.

deni's avatar

@JLeslie I should be more specific. With some bras, when I put them on they do fit okay. If they just stayed like that, it would be fine, but they slip. OTHER bras just don’t go short enough to begin with. So, what can I do if the strap just needs to stay put?

augustlan's avatar

Some bras (I think Playtex?) now have silicone on the underside of the straps to help prevent slippage. Those might help. I like the idea of stitching the straps in place, too. I’m like @JLeslie, and have to adjust the straps as long as they get, usually, and some bra straps are too short even then.

SpatzieLover's avatar

^Yep, Playtex does have silicone @Auggie. They’re not bad, either.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

You may have narrow shoulders. I’ve had the same bra issues all my bra wearing years, even when I had small boobs. I have found pretty bras with crossback straps at Victoria’s Secret and Aerie. Mosty of them are convertible rather than racerback but they work well so far.

JLeslie's avatar

@deni I have one bra that slips, just how it is constructed I guess, I almost never wear it. I can’t tell from here how your bra is fitting obviously, but if you have some that fit well, stick with them. Bras are one of those things that if you have one you like, you should have at least three of that style, two nude, and one black. Also, I used to tell me customers the ugliest bras make the prettiest clothes. This was in Florida where t-shirst and casual clothing are worn most of the time. Lace and seems just make knit fabrics bumpy, so don’t go for sexy bras, if you have been, go for smooth, supportive, well constructed, and comfortable. Some sexyish bras have the straps farther to the side, especially demi-cups. Basic bra, not molded or padded sometimes have wider straps, especially wider right above the breast and then narrows as it goes over the shoulder, do you know what I mean? I can’t explain it well. I sould look for photos, that might work better for you.

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