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gimmedat's avatar

Do you know a "trumper" and how do you deal with him/her?

Asked by gimmedat (3943points) June 12th, 2008 from iPhone

I like to affectionately refer to those people whose situation is always ramped up a notch as “trumpers.” You know the kind: when you say you’re tired he/she strikes back with, “Oh, talk about tired, I worked 23 hours straight and am running on 4 hours sleep over the last three days.” Or when you say, “Man, I sprained my ankle and needed three stitches when I fell hiking.” and lo and behold the trumper pipes in with, “When I climbed Everest I slipped and finished the climb with a concussion, severe lacerations, and a ruptured spleen.” These people always have a story to trump yours. I understand the innate desire to relate personal experience, but c’mon these people are too much! I normally make up a wild story to get the trumper thinking. Have you had this experience?

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22 Answers

arnbev959's avatar

I know a few. I generally avoid them. It’s impossible to have a conversation with someone like that.

paulc's avatar

I’m guessing that these kind of people are making it up. You could be pedantic and ask tons of questions about the most minute details about their story which is always a good tactic to bust someone in a lie. There’s always the tactic of disbelief and then demanding proof. That might get them mad though which can be good or bad depending on how you see it.

jlm11f's avatar

this is silly but i was once talking to a girl, who is pathological trumper, about harry potter books. i told her i had read up to the 5th one (there were only 5 at that time) and she said “oh i have read about 15 so far!” (to any one that doesn’t know…there are only 7 harry potter books)

Edit – i forgot about your actual question about dealing with them. The first few times I will ignore the trumping, after that I will tell them I know they are full of it and if it continues I will happily and blatantly ignore them.

Allie's avatar

Yeah, I know someone like this – I just brush it off. If it makes her feel better about herself, or feel like she’s special, then so be it. I said what I wanted to say and instead of just making conversation she wants to one-up me. Sometimes it can be annoying, but I consider myself a pretty easy person to get along with, so I just let it go. I can think whatever I want, but confronting her about it won’t result in anything good. If it’s true, then I’ll just look like an ass. And if it’s false, then she’ll look like an immature fool, and I don’t want to make anyone feel bad about themselves. In my mind, the best thing to do is just let it slide.

PupnTaco's avatar

I’ve learned to avoid them. In their minds they’re just trying to relate, but it comes off as obnoxious.

gorillapaws's avatar

I like to over-trump them back, often to absurdity. There aren’t many opportunities that you can claim absolutely ridiculous lies as the truth. So I look forward to them when they do present themselves.

“you’ve read 15 hairy potter books, no shit? You know, I was the one who invented the sport of quidditch…”

skfinkel's avatar

I really laughed at the way you framed your question. Yes, I know someone like that. Not so extreme—it’s kind of like they are telling you they get it because it’s even more extreme with them. It gets tiresome but… A friend. In my case, nothing to be done.

iJimmy's avatar

Oh talk about trumpers! They are nothing. Bluffers are much worse!!! I have to deal with bluffers all the time. Have you ever had an experience with a bluffer??

marinelife's avatar

I worked with someone like this. If someone said they were in the service, he started to talk about his time as an intelligence officer. His name was an inside joke. The guys in his department kept a list of every occupation he had claimed. He would have had to be 500 years old to have done it all.

I think it is really a serious neurotic condition and kind of sad.

margeryred's avatar

The craziest thing about it is it seems like they don’t know they have the disorder. I don’t know how to handle them either (see other post reverse racism).

richmarshall's avatar

Oh yeah…you think you have it bad? Well this one time this trumper I know…...ahhh never mind.

willbrawn's avatar

i once knew a guy in california that had a major problem with this. He once claimed that he won the Kentucky derby – because a friend of mine was from Kentucky and watched it live a couple time. He claimed to have won nationals in cheerleading while in high school. The same year my other friend from Alabama won (lo and behold my friend didnt see him at the competition). And he was with the president on 9/11 in Air force one because his uncle was in the Pentagon and they had to evacuate.

In the end he kept making people turn away from him until a group of 5 of us sat him down and told him how we felt. We tried not to do it mean, and it actually worked. He just wanted to be liked.

cheebdragon's avatar

Danny Bonaduce???

wildflower's avatar

I find selective hearing and totally disinterested responses like “uh-huh” or “right” go a long way. They can keep going if they want, but I can keep responding with a sarcy tone too….so there!

The alternative (which is fun at times) is to fake an over-the-top interest and go “oh WOW!!” at everything they say.

yannick's avatar

I know a few, and have always referred to them as ‘story-toppers’, just like JD from ‘Scrubs’. Generally I just give them a snappy retort and then they sulk… haha.

Bri_L's avatar

Very very frustraiting. Like that skit on SNL right now. If it is just me and that person I will eventually say “wow, mine was nothing compared to that” or more potantly ” wow, my was squat compared to that. ” if I was around others I will make it my lifes mission to pay attention to everyone but him/her

cheebdragon's avatar

The people who always tell stories about how they are good friends with so & so…......I had a roommate one time who claimed she was good friends with some major people in the Mexican mafia, she “could make a phone call and the Mexican mafia would kill anyone she wanted dead” because they were like her family (she’s a white girl who couldn’t even speak Spanish), she thought she had so many friends…......one day I got sick of the stupid ass stories and I told her “if you know sooo many people, why the fuck are you living on my couch?”
I had to kick her out about a month later…...

margeryred's avatar

Here’s a thought… one up the one upper and see how far they/it will go…

That could be like an improve comedy show…

scamp's avatar

I put up with it for just so long, and then I call Bull straight to their face.

jessicar's avatar

Yeap I knew someone like that. Everytime someone had a story he would always have a better one. It got to the point where no one wanted to hang out with him anymore because of it and I actually told him that the reason no one wanted him around was because of this. He just got kind of embarresed and stopped for awhile, but ulimately he just started doing it again. Well all I can say is you can choose to deal with it or stay away from people like that.

Silhouette's avatar

Sometimes I run the first leg of the race before I yield the field. Others, I get on my mark get set, and their off….I wait for them at the snack bar.

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