Is my best guy friend feeling something more?

If your instincts are screaming to you, then you should listen. This is dangerous territory.

However, I don’t think you need to cut him off completely. Just take the next opportunity when he does something which you sense isn’t entirely appropriate to re-establish clear boundaries.

Instead of thinking, “if we are just friends, why are you complimenting my eyes?” SAY IT OUT LOUD. but keep it on the light side.

He might be unaware of how flirty he’s acting or he may indeed be testing the waters to see if there’s a possibility of something romantic between the two of you. We aren’t mind readers so being nasty to him about it is a bit much. Save that for if he keeps this up after fair warning.

But for now, just wait for the right moment and speak up. Just a tone of lighthearted surprise and amusement should do the trick if he isn’t aware of how flirty he’s being.

Something like asking if you want him to pick something up on the way to work is not necessarily flirty. Friends do that for each other all the time.

But friends don’t usually go out of their way to tell you how beautiful your features are. That’s flirty territory.

Just make sure that the first time you call his attention to this problem that it’s in flirty territory. You sound like you’ve got good common sense about that. So use it.

I know that some of this kind of caught you off guard cuz you weren’t expecting it or thinking along those lines so you just kind of did nothing.

But, now that you’re aware of what makes you uncomfortable you can’t continue to be passive lest he interpret that as consent. Next opportunity just speak up and re-establish those necessary boundaries so that your friend can remain a good friend.

He might be flirting or he might just suck at socializing. Does he do anything else awkward when he socializes with other people that you’ve noticed?

I don’t necessarily think doing nice things for you is weird at all, especially considering the fact that you’ve known him for four years. However, the comments about your features, especially your lips, is where I can definitely understand why it starts to make you feel uncomfortable.

@Buttonstc is right – you need to tell him the compliments feel a little weird and uncomfortable for you since you’re both dating people. Clarify that you don’t know if he means anything by it, but also state that you feel like it’s better to be safe than sorry because you don’t want to mess up any of the relationships involved.

I wouldn’t mention this to your friend right now, but if it doesn’t stop, I really think you should. I was in a situation that became very uncomfortable for me when I suspected (but wasn’t sure) that my best friend’s boyfriend was interested in me. Down the road, he blatantly admitted that he was and I ended up having to talk to my best friend about it. So, for now, play it by ear but definitely pay attention to your instincts.

Don’t beat around the bush. Don’t assume. If it’s that important to you, ask him straight out. Honesty is always the best policy!

I used to “flirt” with female friends just to try out lines and things in safe mode. Just throw out “friendzone” comments just in case. If he’s like me he won’t get subtle hints so just tell him where you’re at.

I think you have to be careful because you do work with him, and you don’t want to make anything uncomfortable if you have to spend 8 hours a day with this person. Tread carefully.

I guess I’m just not sure how to mention it in a “light-hearted” way. I don’t want to make things too awkward or anything since at the end of the day, we do have to work together.

Side note: I also found out he got me two Christmas gifts instead of one. He says it was ordered it by accident, but he felt obligated to give it to me. But he also got his girlfriend two gifts…..I feel like he should just give it to her, but he refused saying it’s for me.

Ughhh…...I mean I’ve mentioned stuff before about this, but he says he doesn’t feel anything for me and that I’m “gross” for even thinking that.

Hey, it’s HIS boundaries that need adjusting, and he’s deflecting the argument by calling you “gross”. You are absolutely right for feeling concerned. You just need to reestablish those boundaries. He’ll never know if you don’t tell him. You just need the right time.

Maybe he just feel safe around you. You’re both in relationships, so he doesn’t have to constantly censor himself. I wouldn’t assume the worst.