Social Question

stanleybmanly's avatar

For those not yet snared, how do you evade the "trap" of commitment?

Asked by stanleybmanly (22357points) December 19th, 2015 from iPhone

Come to think of it, why should “victims” merit exclusion from advising my idiot nephew?

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14 Answers

ragingloli's avatar

Dogs only live for about a decade.

Uberwench's avatar

I don’t really know what you’re asking. Commitment isn’t a trap, and it’s really easy to avoid. You just say “no” when someone tries to get you to commit. Someone wants to be exclusive or get married or otherwise limit your options in a way you don’t like? Say you’re not into that. You might lose them as a partner, but that’s the price of admission.

canidmajor's avatar

Do you have a particular type of commitment in mind?
For normal people with a conscience,
Having pets is a commitment
Owning property is a commitment
Drawing breath every day is a commitment.
And so on, and so on, and so on.

Dutchess_III's avatar

…Where did my response go? I said, “What ‘trap’?”

Seek's avatar

I’m guessing your nephew has a potential fiancee of whom you do not approve?

Cruiser's avatar

First off…those of us who are in committed relationships have plenty or reason(s) for why they have chosen to continue on with their selected partner and characterizing some or all who have made that choice as a victim is no different that calling anyone inside or outside a relationship a victim of their own circumstance that placed them in or out of a relationship.

If you want to evade a trap or anything for that matter, you just do it. Not so hard to accomplish if you just commit to it.

stanleybmanly's avatar

No the nephew believes that he bears the gift of invulnerability to lengthy romantic “entanglements”, and is casting about for assurances that his immunity is permanent.

zenvelo's avatar

@stanleybmanly All he really needs to do is keep telling all the women he meets what his belief is, and it will come true.

elbanditoroso's avatar

It seems to me that commitment ought to be voluntary – something that a person opts into on their own. As someone else wrote, it ought not be a trap.

I can’t speak for your relative’s situation. But one must assume that if a girl is committing to your nephew, she ought to be aware of what she is doing.

Seek's avatar

Yeah, I agree with @zenvelo – that’s a self-fulfilling prophecy if I ever heard of one.

He just has to avoid women who see him as some kind of “project.”

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

There are lots of actions that will pretty much ensure men and women remain single. Quite a few members of my family are single. I don’t know if that’s by choice or not. I do think the people concerned are quite closed off. They don’t let people get close. Some are quite arrogant and/or chauvinistic. They’ve been alone so long now, I don’t know how they’d cope with a relationship that requires compromise and consideration of others.

However, as someone in a committed relationship, I do not believe I either trapped my husband and I do not feel trapped in this relationship with him.

Love_my_doggie's avatar

Commitment isn’t a trap; it’s a privilege.

dammitjanetfromvegas's avatar

Fall asleep on a bar stool every night.

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