Social Question

tinyfaery's avatar

Am I a cougar?

Asked by tinyfaery (42664points) June 22nd, 2017

This is a long running joke between me and my wife. She also calls me a pedo, though in itself is not funny, it is when we talk about this.

Of course I do not cheat on my wife, but I get serious crushes on celebrities, mostly men. (I do have crushes on certain female celebrities, but not to the extent I get male celebrity crushes.) I put my crush of the moment on my lock screen, on my computer wallpaper at work. I try to consume all their media (TV, movies). I follow them on social media.

Most of my crushes are younger than I, but by no means under age. I blame it on my body wanting to breed, but maybe it’s just my immature self.

My crushes started about 3 years ago. First it was him. He was still in his 20’s when my crush developed. Still love him though.

Then him. He makes my heart flutter.

Now it is him. Good lord. He just gets my engine roaring. He has to be the one I’ve crushed on the hardest. Like, I’d ask my wife for a pass if I ever was in that situation. He is only 29 right now.

I am 43.

Your thoughts?

(I put this in social, but I’m not happy about it)

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21 Answers

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

I do not know if you’re a cougar. I will say that I highly approve of your taste in men. YUM!

stanleybmanly's avatar

It isn’t desire that marks a cougar. If you’re in no position to pounce, you’re not even a candidate. As far as fantasies go—well, whatever works tf.

kritiper's avatar

You have cougar tendencies. Don’t sweat it!

ragingloli's avatar

Do you have paws?

funkdaddy's avatar

I think of cougar more as someone with the motivation to go and actually get the younger men, usually where they are. They know what they want and do the work to land it.

You don’t seem to be in that same territory at all, right? You just have a fantasy for a character that (unexpectedly?) turns you gooey inside.

But it’s funny to think that your behavior would be seen as completely inappropriate if you were male and were lusting after hot young ladies.

Aethelwine's avatar

Cougar tendencies here

I just realized he’s the same age as my oldest son. 25 years old. I’m 46. eek

tinyfaery's avatar

@funkdaddy Where I live plenty of older men have young wives. It’s not really frowned upon. I am also very bisexual.

@jonsblond I’m glad I do not have kids to compare these men to.

ragingloli's avatar

It is all about those fresh genes.
If you started to desire degraded genes with advancing age, now that would be wrong.

ARE_you_kidding_me's avatar

To me cougars are 50+ dating men in their twenties. When I was in my late 20’s women in their early 40’s were still on my radar. As a 40 year old man I’m still attracted to women in their 20’s but also women as old as 60. When you are in your late thirties to early forties the dating pool is just that large. I also don’t have kids and I look about 10 years younger than I am.

funkdaddy's avatar

@tinyfaery – sorry, it was just a quick thought, but wasn’t about the people we actually end up with.

Imagine your married male boss is in his mid-40s and has a Kate Upton desktop on his computer and image on his phone. He makes happy noises whenever she comes on TV.

I’m good with people doing what makes them happy, it’s just odd that one is celebrated and the other is creepy.

ragingloli's avatar

@funkdaddy
because the patriarchy expects men to mate with as many females as possible, and demands that women become one man’s exclusive property as soon as possible.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

This reminds me of a distant relative. She was well known for speaking her mind. When she was in her late 30s, she often said – with her husband standing next to her – that when her husband turned 40, she was going to trade him in for two 20s. He threatened to do the same, to which she replied, “Everyone knows 20 goes into 40 a helluva lot more than 40 goes into 20.”

JLeslie's avatar

Cougar yes.

Being called a fart I would tease you about, but my husband calls me Tana, short for putana! So, I can’t talk.

Dutchess_III's avatar

No. Just a woman.

Call_Me_Jay's avatar

No, fantasies don’t count.

Excellent choices for crushes, though. I’m a straight guy and I see the attraction to those guys.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

You’re just not dead. If you stop lusting after gorgeous men of any legal age, call the doctor. I love the Hemsworth boys.

rojo's avatar

To be a cougar you have to have an uncontrollable desire to be with younger males regardless of whether or not they are famous. You are just someone with a vivid sense of whimsical fantasy.

ucme's avatar

Not so much a Samantha, more like a pink panther

Dutchess_III's avatar

“Uncontrollable” desire @rojo?

PullMyFinger's avatar

…....slowly…..backs…......out of room…....

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