General Question

emilyrose's avatar

What is up with the three day rule?

Asked by emilyrose (2269points) August 13th, 2008

For real. You know what I’m talking about. Why do guys feel like they have to wait 3 days to call a girl once they get her #? By the way, of course I know this isn’t always the case. When I met my ex he said “I’m calling you tomorrow” and he did. My roommate just went on a date, was convinced the guy didn’t like her, and then called her today—- 3 days later. What’s up?

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36 Answers

peedub's avatar

That’s BS. I don’t follow those rules. You like the person/want to say hello, do it.

emilyrose's avatar

right on man!

girlofscience's avatar

Yeah, very stupid rule. If a guy waited three days to call me, I wouldn’t pick up the phone.

cak's avatar

I don’t think I ever really experienced that! I’m with girlsofscience on this one, I wouldn’t pick up the phone.

ninjaxmarc's avatar

I call the next day, show my interest and don’t play games.

Games are just stupid. 3 day rule is just dumb.

RandomMrdan's avatar

the guy doesn’t want to seem too excited…I guess it makes us feel like we’re over the top a bit when we call too soon…almost as if we’re too eager to call you.

I normally will wait a day or so…but 3 is kind of pushing it.

RandomMrdan's avatar

I wouldn’t say it’s a rule…I think it might just be enough time for you to not expect a call….then BAM oh hey it’s that cool guy I hung out with a few nights ago.

emilyrose's avatar

but the ” 3 day rule” is a thing…most people know what i am talking about. Oh well : )

shockvalue's avatar

haha, I thought I was being set up for a great joke….

For real. You know what I’m talking about

flameboi's avatar

the 3 day rule is a stupid excuse men invented to have enough time to get the courage they need to call when they are not sure about what they want with a person….

girlofscience's avatar

@RandomMrdan: What if you met a girl and just hit it off SO well? The night was filled with laughter, passion, and awesomeness, and she couldn’t seem more perfect. She was also just as into you. Why the hell would you not call her the next day?

wundayatta's avatar

I’ve never understood this either. If you like someone, show it. If the woman thinks it shows you’re too needy, then either she’s got problems, or you were wrong in your assessment of the attraction.

Knotmyday's avatar

If I liked my date, and we had a good time, I’d always call them that night- to say thank you, and good night! Only downside was, We’d always end up talking into the wee hours, and feel like crud the next day at work.

The three-day rule is the narcissistic construct of immature jackasses. Do Not Apply.

RandomMrdan's avatar

@girlofscience If the night seemed to have gone that well, and it seemed like we were a match made in heaven, then of course I’d call the next day, but if it’s like any other girl that I’m just into…I’m not going to mess it up by seeming over eager to meet her again.

wundayatta's avatar

Funny, when seeking a job, employers love to see such eagerness from their potential employees. Why do we think such enthusiasm is a drawback when meeting a woman?

timothykinney's avatar

It’s what our friends taught us. So I blame a lack of role models.

ninjaxmarc's avatar

@ daloon
Because relationships should not be a job.

wundayatta's avatar

@ninja: nice pun!

timothykinney's avatar

@ ninja: Then why are they so much work?

ninjaxmarc's avatar

@timothy
Because the people that make it a job fail at it miserably.

RandomMrdan's avatar

@any of the women…you don’t think it would be strange at all if a guy you met was too eager to get together again?

I guess guys just want to play it cool and calling too soon makes us look desperate in a sense.

girlofscience's avatar

@RandomMrdan: No, I would never think that was weird. I am quite the catch, and naturally, would expect any guy to be excited to see me again. If he wasn’t, I’d think there was something wrong with him.

emilyrose's avatar

I believe that a man who meets you and sees how rad you are should be worried you might get scooped up by someone else and call soon…..although there is a fine balance of showing interest and being overboard and freaking you out…........

marinelife's avatar

Rules are a stupid way to conduct relationships.

wundayatta's avatar

I suppose there is a competitive aspect to coupling up, but it also seems to me that there is matchmaking—a compatibility issue. So if you give into the “I’m a great catch” mentality, you might well miss a very compatible partner, because you have some preconcieved idea about how awed they should be of you.

I wonder, too, is it looks that make one a catch, or something less obvious?

girlofscience's avatar

@daloon: I wasn’t being serious. (At least not completely.)

wundayatta's avatar

You might be kidding, ms science, but I do know at least one person who exemplifies that attitude. She absolutely appalls me. And for some reason (she used to work for me) she thinks I want to be regaled with all her stories about various conquests. Sigh.

mee_ouch's avatar

Why wait…Call him!

emilyrose's avatar

@ mee_ouch—question wasn’t about me, but if it were, I subscribe to the “He’s just not that into you” theory.

mee_ouch's avatar

I know emilyrose…...it was just a generalization.
I agree wholeheartedly!

Fieryspoon's avatar

I went to a club. I danced with a girl. She gave me her phone number. I called her the next day. She didn’t pick up the phone. I left a message. She didn’t call me back. I called her again three days after she gave me the number. She picked up. Coincidence?

I think not.

emilyrose's avatar

@ fiery…...and??? did anything happen?

Fieryspoon's avatar

Actually no.

When she gave me her phone number, I had… necked with her a little in the car, when I dropped her off at her apartment. When I finally spoke to her, three days later, she told me she had a long term boyfriend (which is not awesome).

She asked if we could still be friends. I said no, hung up, and I ran into someone new shortly thereafter. I called the new girl on the next day, and it each day thereafter has been a blessing :)

Maybe the three day rule has been misinterpretted—perhaps it was supposed to be: If you can handle waiting for three days, then you know she’s not the one for you.

emilyrose's avatar

@ Fiery—- I like that! Well congrats!

Fieryspoon's avatar

Even if I were still single, it would have been the last time I tried to pick up a girl in a club though :)

trickynicky's avatar

I think it’s people who are a lacking a little bit of confidence who do that! I know because when I was 16 and in my dodgy years “LOL” I was very
Much like that… Now I’ll call them as soon as they walk out the door ha ha! A little goes a long way.

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