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squirbel's avatar

Eager. Impatient? Micro-managing? I made a financial plan for the next 3 years, and I can not think of anything else.

Asked by squirbel (4297points) March 8th, 2018

I am a planner.

I have plans for almost every facet of my life. It is just how I am wired.

My problem is that I feel as though I am obsessed with this new financial plan. It is difficult for me to do any activity without my mind wandering to my beauteous spreadsheet I made.

Yes, my spreadsheet is nerd porn. And I cannot help admiring it and fiddling with it. I have automated everything represented [savings, bills], and so I do not really have anything left to do but wait for the coming years to come to fruition.

My issue, and the reason I have come here is that I cannot function properly without opening my spreadsheet.

I cannot read a book the way I used to without thinking about it.
I cannot watch Netflix for longer than 30 minutes without thinking about it.
I cannot play a game for very long without thinking about it.
I cannot do my Korean lessons without thinking about it.
I cannot complete my coding lessons without thinking about it.

I believe this means I am obsessed.

I just want to sit back and let the plan just happen as I have organized it to. If anything, I would love to forget it. oh, I would LOVE to forget it.

Can you help me or give me ideas?

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17 Answers

RedDeerGuy1's avatar

Sounds like you are finally getting sick of jumping through bs hoops, and getting ready to do what you like and not what you think othets want you to. Time to put away with childish things and take your freedom for being an adult.

squirbel's avatar

Well, that is beyond the point, haha. I just want it to be the next year, already!

RedDeerGuy1's avatar

@squirbel Don’t be in a rush to be an adult. Enjoy yourself. If you love personal finance then enjoy it while you can. I am looking into saving money by buying bulk and survival food.

squirbel's avatar

How do I enjoy myself?

This is what I am asking.

I am at a loss for what to do! What are things I can do to distract myself?

The activities I listed are pretty much all I do from day to day.

RedDeerGuy1's avatar

@squirbel Sorry I don’t understand. I would enjoy yourself while you have the freedom to waste time. Don’t force yourself to do what you don’t want to. If you want to focus on your personal finance nerd porn then go right ahead. Its your prerogative to play around. As long as it is not interfering with your day to day functions then let it be.

zenvelo's avatar

Sounds to me like you need to disconnect both on a daily basis ( a couple hours a day) and a good long vacation.

Get out into nature with no phone and no media and no electronics for a bit of time each day. Take a disconnect vacation in a different time zone from where you live.

And, what good is your planning if you can’t enjoy it? Life is a journey, not a destination.

janbb's avatar

I have the same problem with internet addiction. I am constantly checking my devices and desktop. Because I am often at my desktop doing project work, it is hard for me not to keep checking.

I do think it is affecting my concentration and am trying to limit myself more. (Ooh – squirrel!)

The thing that works the best for me is to do something away from all ‘puters such as a walk or other physical activity. I’ve found I do much better at reading when it is an actual book and not just the Kindle app at my desktop. (Ooh – squirrel!)

Can you try just limiting yourself to looking at it two times a day. I know that is hard.

RedDeerGuy1's avatar

@squirbel Sorry. I would recommend taking a vacation. Or a staycation for a bit and relaxing. Unplugging for a bit might help. I have problems reading anything more complex than a resturant menu at times. I have a backlog of books to read that I don’t want to read. Your body will tell you if you are forcing it to do what you don’t want to do. In the end you are just human and have limits.

funkdaddy's avatar

The side project always seems more attractive…

Three things have worked for me

1) Use the side project as a reward. Put in 2 hours of Korean and you get a half hour of spreadsheet time. (or whatever works for you)

2) Go all in. Clear a day and push the spreadsheet as far as you can in 24 hours. You’ll probably burn yourself out on it before then. You’re probably understandably excited about the future you’re planning, not really the spreadsheet. At some point, your mind realizes it’s a spreadsheet, not REALLY the future, and for most, it’s easy to walk away from a spreadsheet.

3) If all else fails, use it in your other activities. Build your financial plan in your coding lessons, redo it in Korean, make one for books and netflix watch lists. Sometimes you just have to embrace your inner quirks.

rojo's avatar

Sounds like a severe case of CDO.

squirbel's avatar

@rojo what is that?

rojo's avatar

It is like OCD but all the letters are in the right order…......the way they should be.

rojo's avatar

But seriously, treat it as such.

There are a vast array of methods that try to counter OCD from diet to drugs (try to stay away from the latter). Some suggestions:

Choose plant-based foods as much as possible. This will increase your fiber intake and reduce the amount of processed foods in your diet. It will also reduce your intake of sugar and help you ditch the dairy that negatively affects your hormones.

Choose whatever kind of movement you enjoy and do it daily. It may be a 30-minute walk, a yoga class, a run, or a grueling weight-lifting session at the gym to let off steam.

Decrease the foods that disrupt gut balance and deplete serotonin in the body, and increase your intake of foods that improve serotonin levels. This will improve your gut health.

Bring a daily dose of calm to your day. Whether that is through music, silence, nature, a quiet bath with essential oils, or any other activity that calms and relaxes you, be sure to do it. If guided meditations work for you, such as the app Headspace.

Get a good nights sleep on a regular basis. Instead of harsh drugs that alter brain chemistry and may lead to depression, make dietary and activity changes that can help you sleep more soundly. Look up some whole food-based recipes online and see what you can cook up to get a better night’s sleep.

squirbel's avatar

Meh, metafilter understands me.

I do not have obsessive disorder – I am just excited for my future as outlined in the spreadsheet.

I am merely impatient with time.

gorillapaws's avatar

I would try to work on bending up your wealth curve. Learning to code, learning Korean etc. can all significantly bend that curve to yield much higher results as money compounds over time. The choices you make now can have insane impacts on your outcomes long-term. Obsessing over the spreadsheet will actually yield a worse outcome than focusing on developing skills, social connections, and experiences that could yield a much higher outcome.

Maybe that’s not what you wanted to hear…

squirbel's avatar

I find that writing journal entries has calmed me down.

Thank you everyone!

LuckyGuy's avatar

Wait1 Why is this a problem?
I think it’s great to have a plan – as long as it doesn’t kill you to deviate from it. .

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