General Question

lisaj89's avatar

Does anybody actually LIKE the feeling you get when you are talking to someone you're interested in?

Asked by lisaj89 (720points) April 28th, 2009

I’m curious about this. It may come from my controlling nature, but I can’t stand the feeling of butterflies in my stomach when I’m around a certain person. To me, it’s like blushing when you REALLY don’t want to. Most people talk about this feeling in a positive way, but I hate it. I began talking with this guy yesterday and then later, when he called me, I was so flustered that I didn’t even pick up. Once I’ve talked with someone for a while it’s ok, but when you first meet, it’s awful. Does anybody else feel this way?

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30 Answers

Likeradar's avatar

It’s terrible. And the worst part is afterwards, going over every stupid thing you said over and over in your head.

arnbev959's avatar

I love that. Especially now that I’ve gotten so that I don’t show too many physical sings of it, but my stomach can be in knots. It’s such a beautiful feeling.

I also love that feeling I get in the waiting room of a doctor’s office. Adrenaline ftw.

veronasgirl's avatar

I understand what you mean. It bothers me because I know the first impression is really important, and I want to make a good impression because obviously I like the guy…then, as Likeradar said, I replay every stupid thing I said in my head for days after.

charliecompany34's avatar

i like the after effect. the feeling of accomplishment. i can get past the nerves and butterflies.

Facade's avatar

I like it. It’s fresh; it’s new; it’s great.

chyna's avatar

No. I hate it. I say stupid things, I stutter,
and I’m not as funny as I am with people that know me. I know, because new people look at me strange.

Likeradar's avatar

Talking to someone I like always reminds me of Dirty Dancing… “I carried the watermelon?!?!”

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

Like petethepothead, I’m geared towards the adrenaline rush.

chyna's avatar

@Likeradar Yes! I had forgotten that.

NaturalMineralWater's avatar

I love the butterflies. Always have. Always will.

casheroo's avatar

I think it’s one of the greatest feelings. Even if it does make me want to puke just a bit.

cak's avatar

@Likeradar ha! I loved that line…it was so clumsy…who hasn’t had that moment!

I think the one time I just loved that feeling was talking to my husband, when we first started dating. It was so wonderful, that feeling that I could truly enjoy. I felt awkward so many other times, but I had the full experience, with him – the butterflies, the endless smiles, the anticipation.

I still have that with him, sometimes.

aprilsimnel's avatar

@Likeradar – I hate them too, and the older I get the more stupid I feel when I get those butterflies. I’ll get angry at myself afterward because I’m thinking that I’m long past adolescence and I should be able to talk to a man I’m interested in without feeling insecure about how he’ll perceive me.

lisaj89's avatar

Y’all are exactly right, going over what you said after the fact is the WORST! “Why couldn’t I have said this? Why didn’t I say that? I SAID WHAT!! Stupid, stupid, stupid! Why did I have to wear those shoes today? Why didn’t I just take the time to fix my hair this morning?” It’s exhausting meeting new people!

El_Cadejo's avatar

@petethepothead feeling you get in the doctors office waiting room? Bored from sitting there for so long or annoyed by the screaming children?

Darwin's avatar

The butterflies weren’t so great, but the anticipation, the endless smiles, and the feeling of finding someone who really understands are all terrific.

Jude's avatar

I love it. To me, it feels like a pretty good high. The only thing that I worry about afterward, is whether I had a huge stupid-ass grin on my face at any point.

wundayatta's avatar

Yeah, I lived for that feeling. When I felt it, I knew the person I was with mattered! It was how I could tell I was falling for them. Sometimes I couldn’t let it go that way, but it was still nice to know I could make a connection like that. Sometimes, I hungered for it too much. I did not feel loveable, and thought that if I could find someone to fall in love with me, it might help. It never did. I did it over and over again, and it didn’t make me feel better. When I was diagnosed as bipolar, it made a bit more sense, and suggested I needed to look at myself, not to others to make me whole. I don’t expect to feel that feeling again.

aviona's avatar

Yes. Love it.

Until I say something stupid.

tiffyandthewall's avatar

i like it somewhat, but i hate after when i realize “oh my god i could’ve totally said ___________ and now my opportunity is gone ):”.

and i agree with @jmah, that is the best way to describe in most cases i think. i like feeling super happy for basically no reason afterward (assuming i didn’t say something completely idiotic)

Disc2021's avatar

It’s pretty rare that I feel “butterflies” over someone, but when I do I must say it’s pretty breathtaking and relieving.

TitsMcGhee's avatar

I’m so in the middle of that right now, and I absolutely detest being anxious and nervous like this, but I have yet to work up the stones to do anything about it because rejection makes me more uncomfortable than the butterflies do.

Sigh. I really like this guy… Augh, whatever happened to my self-confidence?

shrubbery's avatar

I love it.

augustlan's avatar

I love it. Whether it’s a potential friend or love, I always have this ‘aha’ moment. A threshold has been crossed, a connection made, awe inspired. It’s such a lovely rush.

funky_princess's avatar

o i love this feeling!!
Its like a natural high!

ru2bz46's avatar

I do love the feeling, but I always get tongue-tied.

Edit: No, actually I love the feeling of having had the feeling. While I have the feeling, it does kinda suck, but once it subsides, I’m glad I got to experience it.

Zaku's avatar

Well, I love it when they accept me in spite of my stun and keep talking to me. I’ve gotten upset about it when it seriously interferes with connecting or communicating, though.

libbinogurl's avatar

I love it as long as its not awkward, its weird how 10 mins seems to be 5 mins

lisaj89's avatar

Really? When I’m in that situation, it seems like time stands still. I’ll think I was talking to the person for an hour but turns out to have been 15 minutes. Especially if there is silence, which for me, eventually there will be (not a big fan of small talk).

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