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TannerRay22's avatar

Im being made fun of over something that isn't true, what should I do?

Asked by TannerRay22 (19points) May 27th, 2009

Last year i had a really good “Girl” friend. Well the relationship suddenly evolved to something so much more than i wanted it to be. So now, this year, people in high school are making fun of me calling me a lesbian and bi, and I am none of those things. I do not talk to that girl anymore. I really cannot stand her because of all this. Is there anyway I can stop it?

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30 Answers

cwilbur's avatar

They make fun of you because it gets a reaction, and that makes them feel better about their own securities. Don’t react, and the teasing will stop.

Besides, what does it matter if you are lesbian or bi?

Ivan's avatar

Damnit

“Lesbian” is not an offensive term. They will only call you that if you keep thinking that it’s offensive.

Grisaille's avatar

Listen, I’m half Malaysian and have been called every dish on the Chinese food menu in my life. Hell, I’ve been called much worse.

You can live with this.

MrGV's avatar

You should not hate her cause of this….just try to ignore it if you show signs of weakness people will make fun of you more so just lay back and let them make fun of you.
But if you’re the violent type beat their asses until they stop.

remember Sticks and stone may break your bones but words cannot.

MAN UP

eambos's avatar

I know this isn’t the answer you want, but it’s the best option: Just ignore it.

They want you to react to it, so by pretending that you don’t hear them, you deny them of what they want. Once they realize it isn’t annoying you, it will stop.

I was name called, etc., for a while, and just ignored it. Within a couple weeks it stopped, because they all saw that I didn’t care.

TannerRay22's avatar

@cwilbur, I dont think there is a problem with being a lesbian. But i guess your right, dont freak and they wont care.

TannerRay22's avatar

@MrGeneVan , i guess i will just beat there asses, haha! just joking! i will just indure it

TannerRay22's avatar

@eambos yea, im just gonna ignore it. it will be hard, but worth it.

cyn's avatar

live YOUR life
only you know yourself better than any other person!
Don’t react because that shows a weakness and people will be making more fun of you because they’ll feel in control of you
who cares if your friend is a lesbian
what matters is that she’s a friend
and friends are a blessing no matter what type of friends
next time tell the people
“who are you to judge me for who i am?”

dynamicduo's avatar

It’s really tough to take the high ground when people make fun of you, but that really is the best thing you can do in the situation. As @cwilbur says, they make fun of you because you give them a reaction, when you stop reacting, they will have much less incentive to bug you. There are other ways to reduce the incentive, such as physical force, but that is not guaranteed to succeed and may cause problems for you later on down the road.

TannerRay22's avatar

@cyndihugs i cant even call her a friend, because i ve tried and tried to tell her thats not how i am, and that i made a mistake. but she insist on looking at my butt, and trying to make me like her, and talk about me to other people.

westy81585's avatar

Who gives a shit what they think?

Hell, I like lesbians. And not even just sexually. They make good friends.

TannerRay22's avatar

@westy81585 you know you like them sexually too! lol haha.

PandoraBoxx's avatar

If she’s talking about you to other people, and spreading gossip that’s hurtful to you, that right there takes her out of the friend pool, doesn’t it? With friends like that, who needs enemies?

TannerRay22's avatar

@PandoraBoxx your absolutely right!

Randy's avatar

I’ve made fun of people and realistically, it was just to give them a hard time. To be totally honest, no matter what you do, they will continue to call you a lesbian more than likely. The least you let it get to you, the better. Once they grow up a little bit, they will probably see that you being (or not being) a lesbian isn’t a big deal and only then will they all quit.

In reality you have three options, none of which are that great for you.

1)You can, flat out ignore it and let them say what they want. This option is the best for everyone but you. You will catch 100% of the pain and misery from this option. As long as you can let it not bother you, this really is the best option.

2)You can fire back with names and slander toward them. This option might make you feel better because you get to “fight” back by turning your words against them. Just dig up as much dirt on them as you can and fire away when they do. This option is bad because you stoop to their level to make them feel bad the same way they do it to you. Plus, it can give them more ammo to slam you if they have more of a silver tongue than you do.

3)You can pound their heads into the ground until they hurt so bad that they will never want to even look in your direction ever again. This is the most risky of all options but the best for feeling immediate relief for your troubles. You will get in trouble for this that can range from suspension from school to trouble with the local police and the court system. You also run the risk of them pounding you with this option.

You really have no way to win in this situation. People are jerks. Jerks are in every part of life and always will be. The only thing I can tell you to help you is that after school, none of them will care about it anymore and you’ll have so many bigger life problems to worry about that you won’t give much of a shit either. Personally I suggest you go with option 1 if your strong enough because it keeps everyone out of trouble and will be better for the future, more than likely. Good luck.

PandoraBoxx's avatar

Option 4 is to laugh about it. Laughing creates the impression that you find the idea so far-fetched that it’s not even worth discussing.

TannerRay22's avatar

im liking option four, its kinda like i just laugh and walk away and they hopefully get the vibe that i think it was funny somebody would even suggest that

cyn's avatar

wow well in that case…i’d ignore her as much as possible
and ignore the people that make fun of you!!!
lol
i have a friend that’a a lesbian too
and i’m not lesbian
just make it clear that you don’t like her in that way
in other words….confront her!
oh and
but there are also guys that are like that
and i know guys that are such perverts

TannerRay22's avatar

haha they all are perves. and like my best friends know i hate the girl. but they dont know why, i want to tell them what happened and that i made a mistake, but i dont want to make things weird.

Randy's avatar

@PandoraBoxx OH! Option 4! Nice. I wish I had thought of that one.

TannerRay22's avatar

@Randy I am probably gonna do both, your number 1 and @PandoraBoxx #4 haha!

cyn's avatar

@TannerRay22
what mistake did you do
and that you’re talking about?
you keep on saying mistake but i don’t quite know the “mistake”.
if i can know….
message me

MissAusten's avatar

I wouldn’t laugh. I wouldn’t beat anyone’s ass, and I wouldn’t ignore it. I guess that brings us to Option 5!

Delving deep into my past memories of high school and junior high, I remember that there were a few kids who were “ringleaders” and kids who were “followers.” Who is the ringleader in your case? Are there a couple of kids feeding the rumors and keeping the teasing going? It might be hard, but try to approach him/her/them individually and alone if possible. Be calm and direct, and just flat-out say that you know what the rumors are, they aren’t true, and you find the harassment hurtful. You don’t want to say this in front of the person’s friends where they’ll feel the need to save face and taunt you even more. Request that the teasing and rumors stop, even if the person denies having anything to do with it. It’s perfectly OK to also let this person know that if it doesn’t stop you will ask for the help of a teacher, counselor, or parent.

In all honesty, it might not make much difference. At least you will not be pretending to find it funny—which you don’t—or quietly putting up with it and letting those feelings of frustration build up. You’ll be showing that you can be mature and stick up for yourself and aren’t scared of people.

Stick to your word and talk to a trusted adult if the rumors and teasing don’t stop. You don’t have to ask that adult to do something about it, since no one really likes a tattletale. At least that person could help you deal with your peers and work through this until it passes. In the meantime, spend time with friends you care about and who let you be you. Look forward to college, where less of this kind of bullshit happens. Good luck!

Darwin's avatar

Option 4 would be ideal if you could do it. My niece couldn’t and she couldn’t stop reacting in a way that encouraged the name callers.

So she switched schools.

cyndyh's avatar

You can always tell them that sexuality is a lot more complex than they’re making it out to be. They’ll understand that (maybe) when they grow up. Best wishes to you.

DarkScribe's avatar

Gee. Get with the program. Currently girls kissing girls is featured on modern soaps and dramas, it is the subject of several hit songs, gay or Bi woman are the protagonist in all manner of literature and TV shows – there isn’t a straight guy alive who doesn’t find girl on girl to be at least interesting if not a turn on. Many women are pretending to be Bi just to make themselves more interesting. What is your problem? Smile knowingly and let them wonder.

AtSeDaEsEpPoAoSnA's avatar

Aren’t we talking about High School here? I would say either throw gasoline on the fire and distort the rumors with even more ubsurd rumors making it all sound ridiculus. Or…just ignore it, not the best thing to do in my opinion. You should definitly find the source of the rumors, then get creative.

filmfann's avatar

This sounds pretty complicated. Can you post of video of it? puts on soft music

tiffyandthewall's avatar

stop freaking out? if you stop making it a big deal, it won’t be one anymore. it’s not like they’re calling you anything offensive.

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