General Question

windex's avatar

How to deal with online DBags/Aholes?

Asked by windex (2932points) August 27th, 2009

okay, so yes, this is the internet and no matter what you say, there will Always be someone who says “well actually…” or “well technically…” there is Always someone who wants to prove you wrong for some reason. These people never seem to go away and are always dicks. Clearly if I’m on a bodybuilding forum asking something, then I’ve tried googling/binging and/or searching the InterF*ckingNet and/or forums but could not find an answer.
Why do people feel the need to sh*t on eachother all the time?
why can’t people be more positive and actually either HELP or keep their mouth shut if they have nothing positive/good to say?

also if I start the paragraph in the discussion by saying “if you blabla then don’t answer” I’m the one who sounds like an a**.

what do you guys think, recently there was an answer that made me think for a whole freaking week, whether or not I should risk getting banned from that forum and reply to the guy, or just let it go. I understand that some of these people might just be young punks or simply idiots, but Sometimes these things get to me.
If you have a thick skin, good for you, but there are some things that I just can not ignore… =)
with love…

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18 Answers

Les's avatar

People like to seem smarter than other people. We are all relatively anonymous, so it is a free zone to be as asinine and bitchy as possible. Just ignore the dumb comments.

ABoyNamedBoobs03's avatar

@Les pretty much. haven’t you heard? only 6’2” guys in there mid 20s who weigh 210 use the internet…...

Dog's avatar

For some it is not about learning or finding answers. It is about verbal sparring.

Les's avatar

@ABoyNamedBoobs03 – Well technically, it is 6’1” guys, but I’ll let it slide this once.

YARNLADY's avatar

The best solution is to use your Power of Ignore, but we Jellies have also have been given two other tools at our disposal the mods and the flags.

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

The best you can do is ignore the person. That person likely just wants attention. Your attention.

Don’t give them that. If you feel like the person is threatening you, you can get the authorities involved.

perplexism's avatar

I think sometimes we (generally we) forget that the internet isn’t an alternative universe where you won’t encounter ’“young punks” and “idiots”. In fact, I find them far more prevalent online, than off. But trust me, I know where you’re coming from. I have thick skin, but little patience for douchebaggery. I have no choice but to simply ignore it, even if it requires stepping away from the computer for a bit.

XOIIO's avatar

Ignore them, and they’ll leave you alone.

derekpaperscissors's avatar

Because online, we are all anonymous. And if we’re not, it’d be too much of a hassle to do something about it. An evil eye or a punch in the face just doesn’t hold in the internet. It’s a bit like blaming god for all the shit that just happened…no one really hears you. Best thing is to learn from it, ignore it, and move on. Or you could try online revenge or hacking…but then, you’ll end up being the online Ahole.
Remember, do not feed the trolls.

evegrimm's avatar

I would say another option would be…find a forum that cultivates respect, and frowns on exactly what you’re saying is annoying (I totally agree); leave the other forums to those who will be rude and obnoxious and PITAs.

I agree with @YARNLADY. Fluther and similar sites work better than many traditional forums because there is that threat of being flagged/reported/shunned.

ubersiren's avatar

It’s the hardest thing to ignore someone who has struck a nerve, but that’s the only way to stop it. Fluther is better than most sites I visit regarding this, but even the mods here fail, and not everything is caught. The only way to end it is to just back away. It does seem that once you hit the “stop following” button, some weight is lifted.

kevbo's avatar

Observe the dbag over the next few weeks and then pick him apart the next time he offers a position that is unsure or potentially vulnerable. If he’s truly a dbag, then others either won’t stick up for him or will dogpile with you.

Another option is to take them to the mat each and every time (with deft debating). Eventually, he’ll get tired of dealing with you.

FB's avatar

If I do not initially respond, then I end up carrying the annoying little barb off with me into my day, and it undoubtedly manifests itself, eventually, as something entirely different, and I mean something that is almost always negative and disturbing. That’s not fair. How did this happen…? This is the internet. When did it become personal…?

So, when these haughty self anointed pundits arrive on my desktop behind their facade of anonymity, I meet them head on, confronting the individual seeking this bizarre level of discourse, and sometimes, what I learn is, well, they are not so bad after all. We misunderstood each other completely, and in the exchange, there is enlightenment for the verbal joust we have peacefully resolved. End scene. Curtain.


Yet, unfortunately, as luck would have it, yuck, luck, the caustic scenario plays out to be even more that what I perceived it to be in the first place, and I, once again, come face to face with the forces of evil, and remind myself, with a variety of head shakes and deep resonating groans, that I, I, I should have heeded the simplicity and the power residing in the approach to these untidy events, as illustrated in a more economic answer to this question which was authored by: The_Compassionate_Heretic. Brilliance!!! Why can’t I ever say things like that with less words? Don’t answer that! I’ll do it for you.

Well, sadly, I do not have that much discipline, and although I admire it greatly, and I should indeed have the grace to save my precious time on the planet for other things, like walking away to seek beauty in the world elsewhere, I am not bullet proof, and once again my curiosity snares me and I am off to the hunt!

Pause. Beat. Listen. Nothing, yet. Respond.

Damn, I might have opened a can or worms for myself with this one…

So, once again, like the times before, deep into the cave I go, to sharpen my spears, and await the rumble of the enemy…

Bri_L's avatar

I just say to them “Kevbo I’ve about had enough of your d’baggery!”

He usually gets the hint!


kevbo's avatar

That’s it. I throw down my gauntlet and challenge you to a gentle, cleansing and refreshing douche at twenty paces.

Enjoy being a woman, Bri L.

Bri_L's avatar

@kevbo – I couldn’t hear you over your not so fresh scent kevbo, or should I say kevina!!!

kevbo's avatar

Dammit! Foiled.

Thus endeth the lesson.

Bri_L's avatar

And they walk off into the sunset wearing “Oops I Crapped My Pants”

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