General Question

maroon's avatar

Has anyone ever had a crush on a regular customer?

Asked by maroon (166points) October 26th, 2009

I’ve work at this cafe on the university campus for 2 years now. Never have I had a crush on a customer before. She comes in about 2 or 3 times a week and we sort of wink at each other when I serve her. I’m not sure what to do next.

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

23 Answers

jackm's avatar

Leave your number on the receipt next time she comes in. Works every time in the movies.

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

When I was 16 I worked for a catering company and had a serious crush on a man whose business we catered to weekly. He completely ignored me even though my boss knew of my crush and had talked to him about me. My situation was difficult for me because I didn’t yet understand and take seriously the danger of over 21’s messing with under 18’s… he was in his 50’s. Nothing ever happened even after I turned 18 which was sad because I really did think he’d talk to me then. Story aside, find a way to let your interest be known and get on with it because you could be having a nice time with a great person, you never know.

bright_eyes00's avatar

say hi? tell her she looks good today? Ask her name? just introduce yourself and be polite not pig headed.

maroon's avatar

I’m pretty sure she’s under 20 or, gasp, maybe even 18. And that would make me 6 years older. I’ve never been this smitten before though to someone I don’t even now, and certainly not to anyone this young. I definitely don’t want to come across as some old douche, but it’s pretty serious. Thinking about it all the time.
I want to introduce myself to her, be myself and ask her name and all, but I don’t want to scare her off.

Jrnevin's avatar

I know a regular that had a crush on a bartender and are now married. Just start a convo and ask her out to dinner. I’ll never know if u don’t try.

DrasticDreamer's avatar

When I worked at a bakery, there was a customer who stopped by once a day, every single week – sometimes a little more often than that. He was from New Zealand – I adored his accent – extremely attractive, and I would be amazed if he couldn’t tell I was attracted to him. He always used to compliment on the treats I made, my decorating ability, etc. He was very flirty, but he had a girlfriend. I never got the chance to say anything, if I’d ever been able to work myself up to it anyway.

If you can’t work up the nerve to ask her out, you don’t have to. Next time she walks in, you buy her drink. Pay for whatever she usually gets and she’ll definitely get the hint.

shockrocks's avatar

I’d be gradual if I were you… if not, it might turn out a lot like my experiences at my local mexican restaurant. Every time I go in there, there’s this one guy that does all of these creepy winks and gestures every time he serves my food. He’s pretty cute, I guess… but his creepiness is a huge turn off… just a tip

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

Ask yourself what the worst that could happen could be.
Sounds like here, the worst case scenario is that she tells you “no” and you get fired.

maroon's avatar

shockrocks I appreciate that. I’m definitely more subtle than that Mexican guy.

DrasticDreamer, I don’t know about buying her a drink. The place I work at has a pretty uptight manager who wants to stick to protocol etc. And there are always people flying around and 2 people on till. I really want to ask her but I’m just too intimidated.

Ansible1's avatar

@The_Compassionate_Heretic GA! @maroon We all think that doing Something is better than Nothing. Do it up, and let us know how it goes =)

poofandmook's avatar

I am 6 years older than my boyfriend… he’s not even old enough to drink legally yet. Who cares :)

rockstargrrrlie's avatar

No, but when I worked in retail I did have a crush on our substitute FedEx driver.

mary84's avatar

Say hi, start talking about something, anything. Just try and establish some sort of connection, friendship with her and then just see where it goes =)

I’ve had small crushes on customers but nothing serious. But hey, if you’re smitten, give it a try. Only regret the things you did.

answerjill's avatar

Do you know her name? Maybe you could start with something like, “Hey! You, again! I see you here every morning, I guess that it is about time that I ask you your name. I’m maroon, by the way.” [smile, maybe shake hands]

maroon's avatar

Yeah good call answerjill.

I have another problem though, which makes me unsure whether to pursue this whole thing or not. It’s besides the initial question and all, but related to me. I’m applying for grad studies in a neighboring city (60 minutes away) which would start in September and go for 2 years. I’m pretty sure she’s got at least 3 more years…. So there’s the long distance thing. Maybe it’s best if I let it be since I don’t know if I could cope without regular meetings.

poofandmook's avatar

an hour is NOT long distance. Try 14 :P

Psychedelic_Zebra's avatar

I’ve had crushes on several heterosexual male truck drivers. Imagine how uncomfortable that can be. I really have to watch what I say, and have come close to spilling the beans. me and my big fucking mouth.

answerjill's avatar

I agree with poof—1 hour is not such a big deal, especially if you have a reliable means of transportation (car or public transport). In any case, no need to get ahead of yourself just yet…

PandoraBoxx's avatar

Piffle. One hour is a cross-town commute in NYC. Not a factor.

Do you know her name from making her drink order? Greet her by name when she comes in. Tell her she has a really great smile. Introduce yourself.

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

If you’ve looked at the worst that can happen and you decide to go for it, you could give her a little something extra like a shot of espresso.
You’ve got to play this cool if it’s to work. You may have to move slowly over a series of days. If you come out with “I really like you and I was wondering if you’d like to go to Appleby’s with me sometime” you’re all but done.
Chat her up a bit. Ask her how her day is. Take it from there.

Haleth's avatar

I think every time this happened to me, I creeped them out and drove them away… :(

mary84's avatar

Well. It’s up to you if you want to give it a try or not. If you don’t want to get into it due to the long distance that is totally understandable. However, maybe don’t rush ahead of things, why don’t you just start talking to her and see where it goes. I agree with some of the other replies you got here, you need to take it slowly if you want anything to happen. Start saying hi, ask her what she’s studying or something, just cool small talk. Then once you get to know her and you’ve a connection you can make your move.
Whether or not you want to try, well that is up to you.
I totally understand if you don’t want to get into anything serious. However, as someone else said, 1 hour is not far. That is not long distance!

I’d rather regret trying than not trying, but it’s your choice. Good luck!

PandoraBoxx's avatar

There is a wide range of socialization options between seeing someone on a regular basis in a coffee shop and asking them out, that does not involve being considered creepy.

Answer this question




to answer.

This question is in the General Section. Responses must be helpful and on-topic.

Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther