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talljasperman's avatar

What changes need to be made for a 12 year old (who is 6'1" ) at school and at home?

Asked by talljasperman (21822points) May 18th, 2010

Their are problems getting clothing, taking baths, getting enough food, finding friends… what else does one need to adapt?

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14 Answers

gailcalled's avatar

I do’t quite understand. He is 6’ 1” at home and at school? Put parentheses around the who is 6’ 1”. Then I think I get your question.

His height is making him selfconscious? Why should there be issues around bathing, buying clothes and eating? I understand that he may be awkward. How about finding him a therapist to talk to who will reassure him that he is simply ahead of schedule

. What grade is he in. Are his parents tall? Did they hit puberty early? Has this issue been discussed with his pediatrician?

Although it is not comparable, I hit my adult (female) height of 5’ 7” early and felt embarrassed and awkward. I slouched a lot. I wish that I had had someone to talk with, and now I’d love to be taller.

talljasperman's avatar

@gailcalled grade 5 , father is tall 6’ 1 mother is 5’ 6” both divorced… cant fit in the bath tub properly (only half at a time)...gets in fights when called (skinny long-necker) gets beats up by adults who attack him when they don’t understand… voice hasn’t changed yet…has facial hair… never seen a pediatrician.

gailcalled's avatar

Forget the bath. Have him shower. Tough in fifth grade. If I remember correctly, all the boys were still midgets.

I am tall and the father of my kids was tall. My daughter was 5’ 6” and my son 5’ 10.5” (on a good day.) Their paternal grandparents were tiny.

contessa55's avatar

My son is 6’7”. He was almost 13lbs at birth. When he was 5 years old, he towered over all his friends and of course his best friend was very very short. At times Zach felt awkard, but overall he has great self confidence. The only thing that needed to be addressed was in grammar school he needed a larger desk to be comfortable. You can go to the guidance office or directly to the principle and make this request. I shop for his clothing on-line at Old Navy and Eddie Bauer. The best way to help your child is to make him or her realize how terrific they are at any height. BTW I used to tell him that as he got older he would see that all the girls like tall boys! He is 17 and now loves his height. Good Luck!

Disc2021's avatar

Only suggestion I could make is to put him on the basketball team.

FutureMemory's avatar

At age 13 I was 6’1”. I don’t recall having any problems with it whatsoever.

Fast forward 20 years and 3 additional inches, and the only things I would consider problematic are fitting my legs into cars, movie theater seats, etc. Kissing women that are almost a full foot shorter than me is also a pain. But I somehow still find the motivation to do it.

talljasperman's avatar

@Disc2021 he was clumsy and dribbled the ball on his feet when moving forward…He hates B-ball…other than slam dunking…. loves soccer though…but thanks for the suggestion

john65pennington's avatar

I was this height at 12 years and i used it to my advantage. puberty was about to kick in and all the girls looked up to me. tell this to your son and get him interested in sports. this will occupy his mind and take away any concerns he has being this tall at this age. it worked for me.

Disc2021's avatar

@talljasperman That’s a shame. Soccer is even better, though =D.

YARNLADY's avatar

All three of my adult grandsons are exceptionally tall. I bought extra long single beds for them. It is extremely difficult to find giant shoes and long, long pants, for bargain prices, but we just keep looking. I have found that mail order helps a lot with the clothes.

They don’t seem to mind that they are tall and take the jokes in stride. I caution you to watch out for medical issues, we discovered that the reason behind their unusual height, and a few other physical features is attributed to Marfan. With this condition, participating in vigorous sports could have been life threatening – so much for playing basketball.

La_chica_gomela's avatar

@talljasperman: Amen to your last post! I’ve always been exceptionally tall for a woman, and I hate basketball.

Buttonstc's avatar

You should definitely get him checked out medically just to be certain that he is just ahead of the curve.

You said that adults are attacking him? Physically or verbally? What kind of ignoramus adults does your town breed?

Kids always pick on anyone who is different. Clue him in that getting angry (and in physical fights) just gives them the reactions they’re looking for. If he figure out how to keep his cool or ignore them, they’ll likely move on to more satisfying targets.

Try to help him come up with some humorous one-liners when they start up. This will give him a better alternative to fighting.

Point out to him why physical fights will just cause him more problems with teachers and school authorities and won’t change the teasing. That’s what the bully kids want.

You can also point out to him that the majority of our presidents have been tall as well as many leaders of industry. People somehow connect height with leadership qualities, at least subconsciously.

If all else fails, a little time with a good therapist specializing in adopescense can work on his self acceptance and creating a better perception about his height.

It’s not going to change (except to increase) so the sooner he can learn how to be comfortable in his own skin, the better for him.

Physical fighting as a defense mechanism will come back to bite him in the butt at some point. Better he should learn some skills so he can be a happy well adjusted tall guy. There are so many advantages to it. He just needs to focus on that instead of all the ignorant dimwits giving him a hard time about it.

Buttonstc's avatar

If he is getting physically attacked by adults that’s called assault (for which they can be arrested). Society expects adults to be responsible for their actions.

If any adult persists in this, that’s lawsuit time.

There’s his college fund just waiting. If an adult attacked my child, you’d better believe I’d be sitting in a lawyer’s office the next day. And they would pay for their ignoramus conduct.

Glad I don’t live in your neck of the woods. That’s outrageous conduct for an adult. How often has this happened?

Was he smartmouthing them or what? What provoked them to get physical with him or were they just doing it for sport?

Even if he were lipping off, there’s a HUGE difference between verbal and physical and adults are expected to know better.

jazmina88's avatar

teach him to be special and love himself. THAT’S HE’S UNIQUE. and to go with it.

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