Massive response:
@jca One thing I thought of to directly answer the question is that it’s rude to go to someone’s house empty handed. You should bring either a food item, a drink item (i.e. wine, soda, beer), a small gift (“a hostess gift” like hand towels, a candle, soaps) unless it’s a party and then you’re bringing a gift. Just because you bring a food item doesn’t necessarily mean it’s expected to be served at the meal.
Sounds like Hanoi to me :) We don’t have to do that in my area.
You’re not supposed to make any slurping noises with your drink or your soup.
Chew with your mouth closed. If something is really intolerable, put your napkin to your mouth and unobtrusively put the food into the napkin. Never spit the food onto your plate or in your bare hand.
Same here. Too bad that Dad and my brother never seem to take those rules. And that annoys Mom sometimes.
Always remember to thank the hosts “Thank you so much for having us! We had a great time!” Be gracious and you may be invited back.
Same here!
@dxs And don’t eat anything with your hands. This excludes informal atmospheres like eating pizza in a park.
Pizza is the only thing that we eat with hands here (well, aside from some Vietnamese specialty :p) The only places I can think of which allow people to eat exclusively with hands are Lao, Cambodia and India.
@GloPro We don’t generally wear pajamas in public.
I don’t know what to call it, but here we have a kind of clothes which can only be worn at home. In home condition, the clothes are pretty comfortable and convenient. Wearing them anywhere else and you will be regarded as impolite. I think I’ll settle to the name “pajamas” for them right now.
Walmart is an exception.
Wow! What is that place? I wonder if I can wear my “pajamas” there too.
In America we eat with the TV on.
My parents never allow us to turn on the TV while we eat. And everyone has to gather in the dining room to eat.
@Seek If you’re eating at my house, however, be honest. I actually want to improve my cooking, not perpetuate cardboard recipes.
That’s what Dad says when he cooks. And my house is the only place I can be honest.
@Kardamom Never ask someone if they’ve gained weight or if they’re pregnant.
Same here.
@JLeslie Pretty much everyöne is expected to shake hands, both men and women, when meeting someone new, especially in a business setting, but in social settings also.
Somehow I love to shake hands with foreigners :)
As far as removing shoes when you go over to someone’s house, I often just ask if they prefer I take my shoes off, especially if they have a pile of shoes at the door. Most Americans won’t insist on shoes off, but are fine if you want to take them off. My husband’s family used to think shoes off in the house was horrible and rude, but they have adjusted.
Hey! Taking shoes off is rude? It’s considered rude if you keep your shoes here.
We don’t use toothpicks for our teeth at the table. In fact, it is bad etiquette in public in general, but it isn’t very unusual for someone to be using one after they leave a restaurant, just looks bad to some people.
My Mom always asks for a toothpick after a meal :(
Etiquette is changing a little regarding receiving gifts. The old school way was to send a thank you note through the regular mail if someone gave you a gift. Some people argue you can just say thank you in person, or with an email. For weddings people seem to still stick with sending a thank you through the mail.
Everyone thanks in person here. Because not everyone is used to the internet and many think a thank you in person is more “sentimental”