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jca's avatar

Do you regularly say to people that you love (family, friends), "I love you" when you are face to face?

Asked by jca (36062points) November 22nd, 2015

Do you regularly say to people that you love, “I love you?”

Is saying “I love you” something that’s difficult for you to say?

I have to admit that it’s not something I say too often. I say it to my daughter, on occasion, and I have said it to family and friends but not too often. If someone, like my sister, says “I love you” I can respond by saying “I love you,” but I don’t usually initiate the statement. I’m not a cold person but I don’t usually verbalize the expression “I love you.” I will write it in cards and things like that.

This question came to mind after my recent question asking if, around your Thanksgiving table, everyone says what they’re thankful for. Some people wrote about their family not being emotional and that it’s difficult for the family members to talk about what they’re thankful for. I can do that, no problem.

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22 Answers

Coloma's avatar

I do, with my daughter and my one closest friend, the only people I do truly love. haha

longgone's avatar

In Germany, the literal translation of “I love you” would be “Ich liebe dich.” That’s strong. Couples say it to each other, but you wouldn’t use it when talking to a child, a friend, or your parents. We have an alternative which is a little more casual, namely “Hab dich lieb”. I use the former very rarely, but the latter quite often. Most often when talking to my sisters, my parents, and (of course) the dogs. I also say it to my best friends, but not face to face.

I am usually the one to initiate with my dad and my youngest sister. With the others, it’s fairly equal. I purposefully tell my dad and little sister that I love them because my dad has a hard time expressing his feelings, and my little sister is a lot younger – initiating seems natural, with her.

dammitjanetfromvegas's avatar

Yes. Every day to my husband and daughter and any chance I get to see or speak with my father and siblings.

CunningFox's avatar

Some might find it kind of sad, but I haven’t said “I love you” to anyone in over ten years and I prefer it that way.
My parents used to try to say it to me as a little kid but it’s always been a very difficult thing for me to say back. Even if I’m talking to a relative on the phone and they say IT I either say “Yeah” or “You too” back. I cringe at the words to be honest.

What’s wrong with me?! Lol. I wonder what the psychology behind that is. Anyone else here like that?

kritiper's avatar

Not at all. Overuse of the word makes it meaningless.

dammitjanetfromvegas's avatar

I guess I don’t love my husband or daughter.~

DominicY's avatar

I don’t say it very often. I tend to agree with @kritiper. I also think that it’s a given—it doesn’t need to be stated all the time. But my whole family is like that; that’s how I was raised. And believe me, it’s not like we’re distant. My family is actually quite affectionate; I’m very close to my parents and siblings and we talk all the time. And my parents were always hugging me as a kid and kissing me goodnight when I was a little too old for that, etc. But saying “I love you” every time we went to the store or talked on the phone was not something we did. And I don’t think it’s a bad thing.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I say it to my kids without fail. My husband, not so much.

Love_my_doggie's avatar

Yes, I say it face-to-face and on the telephone. I always say “I love you” or “Love you” to my husband, brother, and Mom.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

I tell my husband I love him regularly. And I tell my children I love them too. Not so often. However, I do fairly often give them a hug and tell them I love them. I also do say it on the phone, and even via text messages. I think it’s because I lost people I love quite young, so I never want something to happen and them ever to have a doubt about how much I love and adore them.

Dutchess_III's avatar

My son never fails to give me a hug goodbye. He is so sweet. When he’s not being a shit! :D

JLeslie's avatar

Nope. I say it to my husband and very few other people. I have a few friends who say it regularly and I usually say it back if they do, but generally I save it for my husband.

I do sign Love, JL quite a bit to friends and family when writing.

Cruiser's avatar

Yes….freely and often. Life is too short to not let the ones you love know how you really feel about them.

flutherother's avatar

There are only a few people that I love but I never say those words to them. I hope to show them in other ways how I feel about them. The closest I have come is three x’s at the end of a text message to my daughter.

canidmajor's avatar

Yes, I do. I think that the “overuse of the word makes it meaningless” concept only applies when you say it in a meaningless way. When I say it, I mean it. Even in a casual context, when I say it, I mean it.
@Earthbound_Misfit has the right of it.

Seek's avatar

Face to face, only my husband and my son.

In text, like on Facebook, I kind of say it a lot. Ironically to anyone who says something particularly witty, and honestly to very dear friends.

Here2_4's avatar

It is not overuse of the word, but under fueled sentiment which devalues the expression.
Say “I love you” over and over, and really mean it, and you will find it develops strength, and volume, and endurance.

zenvelo's avatar

I say it to my kids just about every day. I say it to my girlfriend at least once a day, too.

ibstubro's avatar

No.
Never.
Maybe a rare ‘luv u’ verbalized.

jca's avatar

Recently a close relative had a birthday party in NYC. Everyone at the table (or most people) stood up and said nice things about her. When it was my turn, and I reflected on growing up with her and how now, she’s so thoughtful and kind, I got teary eyed.

I have no problem hugging and kissing people but when it comes to verbalizing my affection, when I do verbalize it, I get a little teary sometimes.

cazzie's avatar

I talk to my kids in English so I do tell them i love them. My step son and my son. My youngest and I have a funny way to say it when we’re goofing. We’ll say’ l lubber du.’ Something he said as a toddler once that has sort of become our little code.

If I were to say it Norwegian, I would say, “glad i deg. Or. ....‘kjempe glad i deg. We say ‘Jeg elsker deg only for romantic love.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I was thinking of this question last night, so I said, “RICK!”
He spun around and said, “What?”
I said, “I love you!”
He just looked at me like I was crazy! :D

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