General Question

jonsblond's avatar

How do you mend a broken heart?

Asked by jonsblond (43665points) December 27th, 2008 from iPhone

Got my heart broken? Easy to trust again? How do you gain trust again? If anything, tell me a joke to cheer me up please?

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15 Answers

augustlan's avatar

Oh, jonsblond…did it turn out badly? I’m sorry to hear that. Cry as much as you need to, then get up and put one foot in front of the other. Let time do it’s work. Best wishes to you.

cyndyh's avatar

Slow endurance exercise works to make you feel better in the moment and gives you some great beautiful things to see on your own. When I feel crappy (from a broken heart or just a bad day) I’ll take a hike or go paddling for hours on end. You’ll physically feel better and feel OK doing things on your own, and its easier to see yourself enjoying life again when you’re doing something instead of sitting around.

So, a Buddhist walks up to a hot dog vendor and says “Make me one with everything.” :^>

Have a great day. Cheers!

jonsblond's avatar

That’s what I needed to hear augustlan… yes, not the best Christmas for me. Thank you for reminding me time heals.

Jack79's avatar

Only time I’m afraid. Last time I had a similar problem (and no, my Christmas has not been exactly that good either), I used to go to this jokes site and read joke after joke after joke. Thousands of them. None of them made me laugh of course, but it is better than watching some depressing film. After several days I even smiled at some of the better ones.

Another piece of good advice I got is to let the feelings drown you. It’s part of the healing process. Cry, let it out, don’t try to stop it. You’ll get more depressed than you ever imagined, but it can only get better after that. If you are going to follow the second method, please make sure you are among people who love you and can support you. And have someone you really trust next to you at all times, someone you can confide in, that can give you strength and a good shoulder to cry on.

jonsblond's avatar

I did watch a repeat of SNL that got a laugh out of me then I let my mind wander and it got the best of me. Now I’m here. I wish the best for you jack79 and may we both have a better New Year.

nebule's avatar

yes i agree…you really just need to feel sad for a while and try not to make yourself feel better at the start, although you do need to recognise when it is time to get up and dust yourself off and move on….

being a depressive this has been difficult for me to do because you tend to end up getting down about one thing after another…but if you are general a sane and normal person the time to move on should be fairly easy to identify i imagine… you might just wake up and begin to feel like doing more things, getting out there, etc

I could be wrong though…as I say…moving on from relationships is not my forte in the slightest I’m afraid… If you are a bit like me i suggest the first thing you do is get your duvet cover, a great big cup of tea (or beverage of your choice), sit on the sofa and watch either hopelessly sad or ridiculously life inspiring films…for at least a day!!!

Cat4thCB's avatar

do some charity work. help others that need it for one day a week for a month.

you’ll be keeping busy, out of bed, out of the apartment, and away from the ice cream
selflessly helping others will help you to feel good about yourself
you’ll be focused on someone else’s problems
the interaction will keep your mind busy
your problems will be put into perspective
positive responses from others for your help will keep your attitude positive
you may just find someone else selflessly helping others

it is not time that heals you, it is what you do during that time that heals you.

vanslonski's avatar

A lonely heart that is broken,
frees the sorrows yet, unspoken.
mended by loves healing grace,
with an arrow, pierced
and bent into place.

Polly_Math's avatar

Surgical stitches. smile

TominLasVegas's avatar

the Bee Gees rock BTW.

Blondy's avatar

Apply some time. :-) Hope you feel better soon…...

jonsblond's avatar

@Blondy Amazing how much things can change in a year. Time has helped, as well as a wonderful husband that has made every effort to make things right again. Thanks for answering. :)

Neizvestnaya's avatar

If the person is receptive then I say what it is that’s hurt me and ask them their perspective and their future intentions. From there it’s kind of like starting over again, I watch for effort and follow through, I seek to feel from that person that they not only understand me but they really want to respect me and see me feel most secure and valued. I agree with you @jonsblond that time helps but effort backed by interest is everything.

spykenij's avatar

I thought my girl was this person, after a previous break up and some time, but now she too is leaving and there’s nothing I can do about it. She just wants to be selfish right now and I have to let her and try to distract myself as much as possible. She left and wouldn’t even come back after my cat got sick and needed surgery. I think he may come home from all this today. She is supposed to be the mom to all our kiddies. She isn’t really even acting concerned. I am royally screwed and so intensely alone in this. My mom is bat-shit crazy right now due to a thyroid problem and menopause. I can’t go home. My step-father has made it clear that I am not welcome, though my mom says differently. All my family and real friends are 200 miles north. I do not know what to do, how to find the strength and I feel I am not going to be ready to start digging through things, I begged that we not pack together, to seperate my things from hers. I feel like I’m reliving a previous nightmare with the person who was supposed to be and wanted to be my everything. I never smothered her, I learned from my past. She wanted to be more to me and more to me and then she just dropped me at my weakest point. Right after giving her exactly what she wanted – writing off my parents.

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