General Question

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

What sorts of activites are there in your life that create circumstances under which it is impossible for you to look cool?

Asked by The_Compassionate_Heretic (14596points) May 6th, 2009

For example, as I was walking the one block home from the supermarket, I realized that it’s entirely impossible to look cool while carrying home a 12 pack of toiler paper under your arm.

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38 Answers

Blondesjon's avatar

When we sperm test our bulls.

don’t ask

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

Now that you’ve “said don’t ask”, of course I have to ask.

asmonet's avatar

<—Singing along and air guitaring to Rick Astley in the car while driving to class. I was doing my impression of him to boot. :)

The guy next to me gave me a weird look.

But I guess that depends on your definition of cool.

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

@Blondesjon You’re right. I shouldn’t have asked.

YARNLADY's avatar

When you lift your son off the merry-go-round at the park, right after he just had lunch of chili cheeze hot dogs. Always carry an extra t-shirt in your car, along with a change of clothes for the kid.

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

@asmonet Actually, that registers as a fairly awesome moment in a way, despite Rick Astley.

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

Some days at work require me to bark loudly into a walkie talkie.

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

@hungryhungryhortence The walky talky is a legitimate work thing. I think you’re ok as long as you don’t have the bluetooth earpiece. That’s the kiss of death for sure.

kenmc's avatar

When people watch me eat when I’m eating something messy.

I try not to make a mess and end up eating really, really fast…

evelyns_pet_zebra's avatar

@Blondesjon hmm, and if the power goes out, then do you have to do it manually?

elijah's avatar

Picking up dog poop. Driving my son to school in my bathrobe.
@Blondesjon I love that it’s called an ElectroJac. How appropriate!

Aethelwine's avatar

Having to buy exlax at the supermarket and the cashier needs a price check.

knitfroggy's avatar

I don’t know how you could look cool while pooping-unless maybe you had some really good sunglasses…

KatawaGrey's avatar

The washing machines I use are in a different building and I never put my bras in the dryer. I imagine I must look very strange walking across the courtyard with 3 or 4 wet bras dangling from my hand.

StephK's avatar

I just finished moving out. Combined with the rain, ugly moving out clothes on, and bags of clothes that kept breaking because of the rain (with some of my stuff going in the street ><) ... I’d have to say I looked pretty stellar. ;)

electricsky's avatar

Having to buy monistat and tampons at the supermarket. Just monistat and tampons.

Jeruba's avatar

Anything that makes you sweat.

3or4monsters's avatar

Getting stuck/tangled climbing in and out of the car. UGH. This is a daily battle for me.

lisaj89's avatar

Right after you trip. I am an expert at this! There is always that moment after it happens that you look around to see if anybody saw it. There’s no cool way to pull that off! I usually just laugh regardless of if anybody saw me or not.

casheroo's avatar

When your child is throwing a huge tantrum, and either kicks or slaps you in the face. Totally not embarrassing at all ~
@jonsblond that’s what husbands are for. mine is forced to buy all the embarrassing products at stores mwahaha

dynamicduo's avatar

Scooping lizard poops. There’s no way on Earth one could look cool doing that.

redstripe11's avatar

There is also no cool way to pull your underwear out of your butt.

elijah's avatar

Running outside in my underwear to close the gate because one of the lovely children left it open. It’s always the same. I slide the door open, dogs go out, then I notice the open gate, sprint through a poop land mine and hope I can get there before the dogs notice.

knitfroggy's avatar

@elijah I bet some of your neighbors think you look cool if you’re in your undies!

jbfletcherfan's avatar

Going to & from getting my hair cut. I do nothing with it before I go, & I just get it cut, so no styling before I go home. I look like a wet rat. I go directly home, ha.

knitfroggy's avatar

It’s impossible to look cool while getting a pap smear

syz's avatar

Getting knocked on my ass by a ewe while my dog and I are learning to sheep herd. Cracked my tailbone. Completely ignominious injury, especially at my age.

critter1982's avatar

I find it difficult to look tough while sipping a drink through through a straw.

Jeruba's avatar

Carrying too much of anything: luggage, shopping bags, food, baby supplies, laundry, weight.

Blondesjon's avatar

@critter1982…YES!!! I have said for years that it impossible for a man to look tough drinking through a straw. Lurve, Lurve, Lurve.

Likeradar's avatar

@Blondesjon I thought I was the only one! A man drinking through a straw is the biggest turnoff!
edited. Not THE biggest. But pretty damn big.

Jeruba's avatar

However, a woman can turn drinking through a straw into an almost indecently flirtatious act. Ah, yes, I remember it well…

Crick7's avatar

When you are hooked up to a double breast pump and have had no sleep!

Aethelwine's avatar

@Crick7 You just reminded me of when I had to take my breast pump with me to Lollapalooza in 1994. As I was going through security when we arrived, the person looked into my bag and did a double take. He then looked at me and said “I’m not even going to ask”, then proceeded to let me in. I felt embarrassed for some reason, though I shouldn’t have.

knitfroggy's avatar

@jonsblond You are so awesome! Pumping at Lollapalooza is hardcore! Lurve!

Aethelwine's avatar

@knitfroggy I don’t even want to think about that port a potty again. Not the best place to pump! All that wasted breast milk down the hole. :(

critter1982's avatar

@jonsblond: But thank God I never had to pump milk in a porta-potty. :)

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