General Question

lisaj89's avatar

Do you find yourself attracting older or younger members of the opposite sex?

Asked by lisaj89 (720points) June 6th, 2009

I’m convinced that there is something about people that attracts either older or younger members of the opposite (or same, I guess?) sex. I have a friend who is 28 who is always getting hit on by guys in their early 20’s. However, I, who just turned 20 (yesterday! :) usually attract guys in their mid to late twenty’s. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing (I think older,not too old, confident guys are sexy), it just piqued my interest.
So, who do you attract, and who are you attracted to?

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59 Answers

FrankHebusSmith's avatar

From 16— 20/21 I found myself almost always ending up with older girls (up to 5 years older).

Since then, I find myself almost always with younger girls (up to 5 years younger).

oratio's avatar

No. I like younger and the same age. A couple of years older doesn’t matter, but I am simply no attracted to women 20 years older.

hug_of_war's avatar

I don’t attract hardly anyone, but I’m definitely more attracted to slightly older men (3–10 years older). It probably has something to do with my perception of the average college male (I’m 20).

Lupin's avatar

Ummmm Did I read that you called “28” older? I’m going home now…

nromstadt1's avatar

As a girl, I’m attracted to older guys… I think I’m a bit more mature than your average person, and guys my age are, quite frankly, immature. Not all of them, but most.

veronasgirl's avatar

I don’t really attract anyone, I’m walking, breathing man repellent.

kevbo's avatar

My gf is 15 years older, and I was dating older before I met her. Generally, I’ll find younger girls attractive until they open their mouths, although I’m getting better about that. Basically, though I have a very broad palate when it comes to women, but there is a thread in my dating history of an inability to partner with someone normal whom I could settle down with.

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

Younger. If I’ve been interested in a man my age or older, I’ve usually had to make my interest pretty obvious, seems they have had a tendency to think me a lot younger and rule me out of their compatibility. I’m not knocking the young guys though.

eponymoushipster's avatar

what is this attract people that you speak of? i’ve never seen this happen, nor do i believe it is possible.

lisaj89's avatar

Aww, Lupin! I mean older than myself, not old in general. Sorry!

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

ha ha ha… look at epony pimping & pandering ;p

Facade's avatar

I’d say I attract mostly older men, and I only date older men.

Aethelwine's avatar

Both. I look a lot younger than I am.

I’m only attracted to my husband.

ru2bz46's avatar

@hungryhungryhortence You’re ”...not knocking the young guys…”, or you’re not “knocking boots” with the young guys? ;-)

Having been married most of my adult life, I’ve not really paid attention to whether I’ve attracted anyone, per se; however, the women that tend to initiate conversations, etc. are generally youthful and attractive. Perhaps that is because those are the exact women I am attracted too. They must pick up on the fact that I am open to contact with them. Chronological age doesn’t matter. I hang with women from 10 years older to 20 years younger. They mostly all have the same youthfulness to where I don’t often know their ages.

aprilsimnel's avatar

I attract much younger men than myself 8 times out of 10, but when it’s an older man, it’s way older, like geriatric. Men +/- 5 years of my age don’t appear to notice me. I’m 39. I think there’s two reasons for this: 1) I occasionally still get carded. 2) I have a youthful mien, as it were.

Lupin's avatar

@lisaj89 Ok then, ... Hey, I can fix you up with my 28 year old son.
Just for the record, I married an “older” woman by a couple of years. She was a hell of a lot more articulate, responsible and intelligent than women of my age group.

chelseababyy's avatar

I won’t go younger. My boyfriend is 23 and I’m 19. I love our age difference.

chelseababyy's avatar

Oops, I double replied.

Blondesjon's avatar

I generally find myself attracting flies.

maybe i should get a new “lucky” ham to wear

ru2bz46's avatar

@Blondesjon Dude, get a new ham, and you’ll be attracting me! :P

MacBean's avatar

Older. But as I get older, and people my own age are beginning to mature, the gap is getting smaller.

cyndyh's avatar

When I get hit on it’s usually by an older man or a younger woman. I married a man 5 years younger than me. Go figure. :^>

ubersiren's avatar

I’m very attracted to older men. It’s such a turn on for me. But the biggest loves of my life, including my husband, have been a year or two younger. Hmmm…

tinyfaery's avatar

Since I look a good 7–10 years younger than I really am, mostly younger people would/do hit on me. But so do men in their 50s. My wife is 6
years younger than I. I think that the fact I began college at 23 made me identify more with those 5–7 years younger than
I. Age plays no factor in who I find attractive. Well, they have to be at least at the age of consent.

ubersiren's avatar

Doh! I read the question wrong… I guess I attract younger men, then.

applesaucemanny's avatar

I kind of tend to do both older and younger but you should stay within your age group like this comic states

Jack79's avatar

Both actually, and the bigger the age gap, the more I seem to attract them (either teenagers or old women). For some weird reason I don’t attract women in their 30s as much. Perhaps it’s exactly because I don’t tend to look at women beyond a certain age range (+5–10 or something from my own). Or it could just be a coincidence.

SirBailey's avatar

Younger. And I don’t know why.

Darwin's avatar

The man I married is 11 years older than I. However, I have had passes made at me by men as much as 20 years younger and by men as much as 40 years older. Well, to be honest, there was one guy who kept inviting me to go out for an ice cream soda and kept squeezing my knee. I was 25 and he was 97, so there was a few more than forty years between us. Fortunately for my inability to say no to chocolate his nurse made him go back to his hotel room for a nap or who knows what might have happened.

These days, I seem to attract mostly small children. Apparently I look like one of the few grownups who like to get down on the floor and play. I just had a very pleasant afternoon hanging out with “Batman” (age 3), Gilbert (age 4), Mari (age 4) and Didi (age 5). There were plenty of other kids and adults there, but they seemed to think I was the one for them.

Resonantscythe's avatar

I don’t seem to really attract anyone, but it’s always older women (5+) years who call me handsome or something (but they’re always family friends or something else where they see me more as a kid, so i tend to think they’re just being nice as opposed to actually thinking it.) The ones around my age usually don’t give me a second look.

Resonantscythe's avatar

sorry, accidental double

loser's avatar

Neither, actually.

cyn's avatar

Can I say that I like people around my same age…?

MacBean's avatar

@loser: I’m younger than you. [wiggles butt in your direction] ;)

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

I’d say that generally it’s people who are my age but I’ve had a few outliers, in the older ranges

Bluefreedom's avatar

I’m a natural born chick magnet so I attract all kinds of ladies, younger and older.

I’m also a legend in my own mind.

Clair's avatar

older men are attracted to me while younger men seem intimidated or something. no matter, they’re losers. lol. obviously i’m attracted to maturity. (RARE)

Resonantscythe's avatar

why do women insist that older automatically equals more maturity? Honestly the only real difference I notice in older men is a wearing out and a goal/ priority change. Or is that considered maturity?

Aethelwine's avatar

@Resonantscythe Older does equal maturity. Wearing out? hold on a minute while I finish laughing. I’d say the older you get the more stamina you have. speaking from experience

Resonantscythe's avatar

always with the insults these people
I don’t know, maybe I’ve just heard women condemn younger men too often.

Aethelwine's avatar

@Resonantscythe Seriously not an insult. I took your response as one. Gotta stand up for my peeps.

Resonantscythe's avatar

It’s just that every single time it’s brought up even young girls(and obviously i men a large number, not most or all, i don’t mean to generalize) act like any male not at least 5 years older than them are the scum of the earth. 14 dates 20 year old cuz 15 not mature enough. ages to twenty then 20 year olds are suddenly infantile imbeciles. ages to 25 and needs to date men in mid to late thirties.

Obviously I’m exaggerating a bit, but do you understand what I’m getting at?

Resonantscythe's avatar

and yes I’ve had it curb stomped into me that women mature faster

essieness's avatar

In my early 20s, I got hit on by older guys. I think they liked my maturity and confidence. Now that I’m getting older, but I’m not aging at all, I get hit on by younger guys. I’m also 28, but I look about 22 or 23. I swore I would never date anyone more than 2 years younger than me, but I’m dating a 21 year old right now. Maybe I’m trying to hold on to my youth? LOL.

Aethelwine's avatar

@Resonantscythe There are always exceptions. It’s cool. :)

Resonantscythe's avatar

@jonsblond Thanks. Just, some things get old to hear.

Though, remembering my first post, I suppose I don’t have much right to complain…hmm

Maybe i should delete that second post?

Aethelwine's avatar

@Resonantscythe I bet you have admirers you don’t even know about (younger and older). Believe in yourself. That’s all that matters. :)

Resonantscythe's avatar

@jonsblond If I do I’d certainly like to know someway to discern who

Darwin's avatar

@Resonantscythe Saying that age always equals maturity is a truism. It isn’t always so. However, if a person is ever going to mature it will be due to living more years.

I also suspect you have not raised children. The priorities of boys and girls are different, which can add greatly to the apparent lack of maturity in boys.

Then, of course, a lot of guys are immature.

Resonantscythe's avatar

Actually with the way my dad is I’ve been more of a parent to my younger brother and sister than he has. I can see the difference in priorities well, but my brother usually proves more mature than my sister, three years his elder, by attempting to actually resolve problematic situations rather than try to scream into everyone that he’s right like my sister does. She does this even when wrong beyond a shadow of a doubt. Also in arguments he seeks the common ground while she, again only wants to “win” the argument. Is this part of that middle child syndrome people talk about? Their ages Are 14 for the boy 17 for the girl

What do you think of the maturity level of someone who constantly goes on about their own maturity at a young age? One of them constantly does this.

Yes I admit a lot of guys are immature. I get that. What I’m saying is, rather than just make the grand generalization that all (and you can tell they mean literally all when they say it) men under XX age are immature, why not instead seek the one who isn’t? Wouldn’t that guy be more of a prize?

wundayatta's avatar

In the real world, if I’ve attracted anyone, older or younger, they haven’t made it known. Perhaps it’s the wedding ring that keeps them away? Yeah, if you believe that, I’ve got a bridge to sell you….

Online, women, mostly younger, seem interested, at least, until they request a picture. LOL.

Resonantscythe's avatar

@daloon actually, about that bridge Check out #4

wundayatta's avatar

Do you think they put up warning signs?

Resonantscythe's avatar

“Warning sudden drop ahead”

CMaz's avatar

When I was younger, I loved older women. Now that I am older, I do love the young ladies.
I have not found anyone that is older then me, attractive. Funny when I was younger I would be all over a woman that was older then my current age.

Jessa's avatar

I’m 16, and I’ve attracted attention from.. all kinds of men, ranging from 18 to what looks like 50ies.

It’s.. creepy.

I don’t like older older guys. I don’t like younger then me guys, though.

wundayatta's avatar

This is not the first time I’ve heard a young woman say that the attention of older men is creepy. I wonder why this is? Is it a natural rule that people should only be interested in people of their own age? Is it that younger women don’t take themselves all that seriously, so they don’t see what a mature person should? Is it that they think the older men only want sex? Is it that they think the men want to take advantage of them in some way just because the power levels are different? Just sort of curious.

Clair's avatar

I’m quite young and I am attracted to older men. Anywhere from 10 to 40 years older.

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