For those that have children. Why did you have them ? I really need some advice.
I am married but I just don’t feel very motivated about having children. I have very mixed emotions about it and often the thought of having children makes me depressed.
However, I came from a religious background and therefore feel guilty for not having them. As a christian I was always taught that you get married to have a family. So my not wanting to have children is making me feel like a sinner but at the same time I don’t think having them will make me feel better either.
As a matter of fact it terrifies me. I just feel like it is just a lot of work that has no reward in the end.
I think if you go having children you have to go in expecting nothing in return.
Also the fact that my parents got divorced when I was younger doesn’t help either. It makes me feel like I might end up getting divorced if I have children.
I just feel like having children changes your life so much. I don’t know if i could handle being responsible to that extent for another human being.
Sometimes I can actually understand why some women end up killing their children. I just don’t think it is for everyone and unfortunately some people realize it when it is too late.
Especially nowadays where we no longer have extended families and/or children usually end up living far away from their parents when they grow up, I just think I am going to end up alone anyways and there is no guarantee my children will be around when I get old, so why bother.
I just feel like so many people just have children to fill a void in their life and I don’t want to be like that.
I just don’t feel like it is for me.
Also I come from a broken up family and think it is not fair to a child to raise them in isolation. I think children should grow up among their aunts and uncles and grandparents etc, however I cannot provide them with that.
What was your motivating factor for having children ?