Can we talk about wisteria?

I hear it is very good at warding off demons, because it is poisonous to them.

I love wisteria. If I came to your house and you offered me tea on a wisteria-covered patio, I would be charmed out of my mind. Do you have a spare bedroom?

You got the idea @kneesox!

It can take off and be invasive. I have mine on a Garden Pylon Trellis in the front yard. Something like this

I would love to see wisteria everywhere!

So wisteria is like Kriptonite to you Raggy?

Something like this

Be at peace with sweeping the blossoms as they fall. When in bloom you may have to sweep every day, and not get upset when you open the Fren\ch Doors and a whole bunch of blossoms cascade onto your fancy floor.

Or not sweep.

Oooh I love it !

Sounds (and looks) gorgeous! Go for it, I say!

We’ll have to have a Fluther tea party. Or beer. Whatever!

I’m not one too ask about flowering plants, because all it means to me is bees flying around.

I will point out one thing about French doors that is probably obvious, but I’ll go ahead anyway. French doors you need to leave room for them to swing, so you can’t have furniture near the doors. Moreover, if you like to leave the doors open you can’t put a screen on them and in the breeze they might not easily stay ajar.

French doors are seen as an upgrade to sliders, but in most cases I prefer sliders, especially if they can pocket. In your climate you might never leave them open, so your situation might be much different.

Wisteria is really beautiful, but I heard it can damage structures. I say go for it, but it’s a good thing that you’re doing your homework.

Maybe get a small leaf blower for the fallen flower petals?: https://smile.amazon.com/BLACK-DECKER-Electric-Blower-LB700/dp/B01HIGWCQI/ref=sr_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=electric+blower&qid=1627522122&sr=8-3

I won’t even worry about it. I don’t rake leaves in the fall any more.

I don’t even know what that is. Some kind of plant, I presume? So whatever flips your wig. If it feels good, do it.

Please choose a native plant, not an invasive one.

Do realize though, that the sound it makes might give you a weird walk experience.
The marble in laminate form.

I’m only going for the look.

If I had to choose between wisteria and hysteria…

Wow – tough one.

A friend has a pergola that had beautiful wisteria growing, but the downside is the stalks are thick and really need to be kept at bay with aggressive pruning, and she said bugs would fall from above when you’re sitting beneath it. Her husband ended up cutting it way back recently, to let the light in and to eliminate the bugs. The vines are really thick and needed to be sawn.

Thanks @jca2.
Well back to the drawing board.
What vining plants would anyone suggest?

Morning glories? They’re beautiful, too. But that’s all I know about them.

Honeysuckle?

I was just going to suggest morning glories!

Honeysuckle. I’ll look it up. We’d have humming bird! Good suggestion @gorillapaws!

Also in VA we have a native plant called the Rose of Sharon (not actually a rose—it’s in the hibiscus family and a perennial). While not a fullblown vine, they get pretty tall and might also be worth checking out as a compliment to whatever you go with.

Edit: they’re not native.

This

@jca2 Man, you are ruining the illusion. Whenever I walk by a patio draped with wisteria, I always imagine how lovely it would be to sit underneath. My imagination did not include bugs falling on me. :/

@ragingloli Imagine what a killing nyuk demon slayers would make selling wisteria essential oils.

Kudzu is a beautiful vine and requires little care! Beautiful pinkish purple blossoms!

^^No, I completely disagree. Kudzo should never have been imported. It covers our forests. Just my opinion, we can disagree.

@JLeslie I was being playful, not serious.

The word “kudzu” makes me shiver! Talk about invasive!