Social Question

athenasgriffin's avatar

Would you pretend to like something in an attempt to relate to an attractive member of the opposite sex?

Asked by athenasgriffin (5949 points ) August 18th, 2011

For instance, pretending to like cats with a cat lover, pretending to like Sims 3 with someone who likes Sims 3 (Which has actually happened to me.)

Have you? If so what did you lie about?

If not, why not?

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39 Answers

FutureMemory's avatar

No.

I’m a terrible BS artist.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

I have done this as a teenager. Now, depending on what it is, it’s probably not worth it because then we wouldn’t be compatible on that item down the road. So what’s the point?

ucme's avatar

No, of course not, for that would be intolerably weak & shallow of me to do so.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

I don’t recall ever doing this to fit in or attract with a potential or existing partner. If movie and television examples of this prove anything, it’s just too hard to recall the lies. Besides, I have a lousy poker face.

Cruiser's avatar

No LITS to live any of it pretending.

wundayatta's avatar

I have tried to like things that a partner likes, but I have not pretended to like anything.

RareDenver's avatar

No, in fact I would probably do the opposite, back in my dating days (married now) I always found that the girls I got into a heated debate with were the ones I got into another kind of heated situation with more often than not.

Mamradpivo's avatar

Have done so in the past, will do so in the future. It’s generally pretty harmless to like something that someone else likes.

tedibear's avatar

Never did it, don’t plan to. I’m willing to try something new – different music or movies or whatever – but if I know I’m not into something, I’m not going to lie about it.

CWOTUS's avatar

The only time I ever pretended to like cats to gain the admiration of a gorgeous cat lover, I was rebuffed completely. What was most shocking to me was that I had recipes and photos to attempt to buttress the claim, and still I was shot down.

So, no. I don’t do that any more. Besides, it was a hard pretense to maintain. They’re actually pretty stringy and gamy. I think I might really be a horse lover, though.

Blackberry's avatar

I’ve tried, but I just can’t BS. Plus, people can see through and you’ll get more respect if you just say you haven’t done it/seen it/know about it.

wundayatta's avatar

@CWOTUS I am really quite impressed with the lengths you will go. You realize you were risking one of those awful diseases that cats and catlike creatures can pass onto humans, right?

It could have been worse. What if she had been a ‘possum lover?

WestRiverrat's avatar

No, if I don’t like something I won’t lie. I may do it even if I don’t like it, just because it will make my GF happy. But I am not going to lie.

Lightlyseared's avatar

Isn’t that the basis for most marriages?

picante's avatar

I have probably feigned more of an interest in some things than I should have—and I don’t know why. I think maybe the “peace maker” in me just tries to get along. I would never pretend to be interested in a political candidate, a religious belief, etc. I can’t say that I’ve ever pretended to like something to attract another person—mostly just to keep the conversaton “light” around a book, movie, etc.

lloydbird's avatar

Never have.

linguaphile's avatar

I haven’t pretended to like something, but have done something similar—I have dumbed myself down to get date with the hottest guy in high school, or kept my mouth shut about things I felt strongly about. Awch, never again.

I will show interest in someone’s hobbies or passions, like I would any friend, but that’s it.

stardust's avatar

I haven’t pretended to be interested in something, but I’m usually interested in hearing about things that are new/not necessarily interesting to me from others point of view.
If I’m not at all interested, I wouldn’t lie about it.

ANef_is_Enuf's avatar

No. I’m a bad faker. That doesn’t mean that I won’t consider taking interest in something that my s/o likes… that’s the considerate thing to do, and part of what relationships are about.

RareDenver's avatar

my wife has made it very clear she has absolutely no interest in sci-fi/fantasy and I have made it clear I have no interest in rom coms/celebrity reality shows

That said we are still interested in each other

Facade's avatar

No. I’ve spent the majority of my life fabricating my own personality and interests in hopes of pleasing others. I don’t do that anymore.

marinelife's avatar

I did in junior high when I had a crush on the president of the golf club.

jonsblond's avatar

Heavens no. Like @FutureMemory, I’m a terrible BS artist. If I’m going to relate with someone, I’m not going to lie.

jca's avatar

No. I might talk to them about what is interesting about that topic, thinking if they’re so interested in it, maybe there’s something to it, or maybe I can learn about it from them. But I would not pretend to like something just to related to them.

King_Pariah's avatar

No why? Why be anything but yourself? If you can’t be honest about yourself to someone your dick is leading you to believe you’re in love with, than why even bother? When the truth comes tumbling out, because sooner or later it does, there’ll be a world of hurt.

Bellatrix's avatar

Nope. Couldn’t really be bothered to do that.

lizardking's avatar

depends on if you wanted a one night stand or a relationship, a relationship NO!

Nullo's avatar

Not much point; any kind of long-term relationship means that you’re going to be pretending for a long time. Pretense wears you out; eventually your patience will break and you’ll get snappy and all that you have built would be jeopardized.

creative1's avatar

No I like to accept people for the differences and I think that what makes us all unique

Aethelflaed's avatar

No. I might not be upfront with them right away on how much I don’t care about math or cycling or whatever, because I can still learn new things and it might turn into an interesting conversation (and because it’s nice to not shut someone down immediately about whatever their major passions are), but I wouldn’t pretend I spend time thinking about those things, either.

aprilsimnel's avatar

No, I haven’t done that. Once the hottie finds out you’re a liar, then what? Is anybody that cute that to not get with them would be so painful?

And if a person’s so into whatever they’re into that they can’t deal with you not liking that thing, then no matter how hawt that person is, you’ve dodged a bullet, really.

zenvelo's avatar

I’ve always been open minded enough to express interest in what a date is interested in, but I never pretend to like it. I can’t get away with faking it, my face betrays my dislikes.

Earthgirl's avatar

I would try to appreciate what they like in a genuine way but I wouldn’t fake it. When it comes to music, sports,politics,art, etc. I like what I like. But I do try to be open-minded. Who would have thought I would grow to love baseball? It’s nice when you can enrich your life by discovering what excites another person about something you don’t know about or understand.

everephebe's avatar

Well there is probably a ratio of how little you like something that you are now pretending to : how attractive this member of the opposite sex is. The ratio should be 1:1 or number<x : x or not really worth it right?

KateTheGreat's avatar

Nope. I think that’s pretty dumb. I had a guy do this to me once (he pretended to be an expert with guns) and he ended up being a total n00b. It’s slightly annoying.

King_Pariah's avatar

@KateTheGreat what can we say? we all think we’re experts in things that are… barreled and shoot out stuff.

Hibernate's avatar

No. I’m not 10 years old to impress anyone anymore. If I don’t like the same things like her then I just take time to discover the other things she likes so we can have a relationship though I doubt I’d bother with it since trying to get into a relationship like this would give me a lot of other problems.

martianspringtime's avatar

No, but I would take interest in it. I can be interested in something – or interested in someone else’s preference – without pretending that I myself enjoy it.

Also, I’ve discovered interests in a lot of new things due to someone I like liking it. Someone I was interested in really liked a band I’d never really given a chance, and I went home and listened to them and ended up actually genuinely liking them.

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