What would you do if you became a male or female version of yourself?
If you’re male, what if you woke up as a female?
If you’re female, what if you woke up one day as a male?
What would you do?
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65 Answers
Spend the whole first day stickin stuff in it.
Making a big mess when I forget to pee sitting down
I would go to a bar and finally see what it feels like to not have to pay for drinks.
I would start stripping to put myself through college. While at my stripping job, I’d lure in some cheating politician and secretly film the deed. Then I would milk him for all he’s worth. When the scandal finally goes public (eventually it will), I’ll have a book deal and movie deal. I will never be broke.
Ambitious I am!
Write a book on how I changed gender overnight, get my own show and have all the people I know on it react to my change. Create a perfume and a lingerie line.
From what I understand, if I woke up as a male, my blanket would be a tent. I guess I’d handle the situation right then and there.
I would date all the adorable gay men I could find!
I would jbe really stressed out. Standards are really high for women to look pretty, and I might still have my beard..
PJ tents are awkward to be honest… gotta wait before you can pee, no body likes that…
I’d hope I had a large penis.
I doubt I’d be all that different, though I’d probably have a good time trying out the new equipment. Um, yeah.. heheh.
Wonder if my girlfriend would still love/be with me.
Then the same thing everyone else would be doing; getting use to their new body.
I always wondered what it feels like for a guy to masturbate…So that’d be the first thing I did.
@jeffgoldblumsprivatefacilities good point. I think I’d spend the day playing with them until they went away or something. Overall, let’s be honest, I think I’d be exploring my body a lot, and so would everyone else. I mean, we wake up with a pimple, a bruise or a beerbelly and spend hours touching it and staring at it in the mirror. Imagine if you wake up with your whole body completely changed! wow!
Once that novelty wore off, (ie after a week in bed spent inserting various objects into my vagina) I’d probably explore the social implications of my new role. Oh and tell my director that I can no longer play a topless, hairy Achilles in the theatre! lol
grow a badass beard, and then hit up the gay bars.
@tiffyandthewall am I to assume that you’re a currently woman with a badass body who hits the straight bars? Or is this to @#$%! men and thus get revenge?
I’d sing in the shower to see how low my voice had gotten, but also, I’d probably freak out at all the body hair.
Dress up as a nurse… no, sorry, I do that everyday anyway.
Well after the first week of exploring, I think I’d pretty much go back to being the usual me.
But it’ll be cool because I can claim a lot of things are sexist.
Put it in any hole I find.
First of all, I would make sure I can still fit into all of my clothes! Then I’d update my facebook picture with one of the new male me and change my status to “No, really!”
Approximately a week later, I’d suddenly realize I really miss my boobs. :’(
I’d explore myself for about 23 days, then I’d wake up the next morning and finally understand what all the women I’ve known were always complaining about each month. Then I’d start complaining and telling all my male friends just how good they’ve got it.
@hungryhungryhortence Hey, after many sisters and two wives, I think it’s sunk in. Periods suck donkey balls.
I would so not have children.
That’s all well and good, but bras do stop you from hitting yourself in the face when you do jumping jacks.
@Darwin dude, I don’t DO jumping jacks.lol.
I do – it is part of keeping in shape so I can pick my husband up when he falls down, which he does periodically.
@Darwin well then just wear the bra ONLY during jumping jacks
If I woke up as a female, I’d immediately get back into bed, go to sleep, and fervently hope that I could revert back to my male form.
What @Bluefreedom said . If that didn’t work have a fatal stroke out of pure stress.
1. Scream
2. Hope that I go back to who I was.
If not, then I’d probably just try to accept it. But I’d probably be seriously depressed…
@Darwin Hitting your face while doing jumping jacks?! Who are you? Dolly Parton?
Get someone to punch me in the boobs so I can finally prove that getting hit in the balls is way worse.
@Ansible1 Good point. Giving birth can’t be that bad.
I’m joking, I’m JOKING!
Hmmm, I’d freak out, and then when I calmed down, I ‘d test that theory that says a woman’s orgasm is ten times better than a man’s. If my wife was around, I could finally fulfill her favorite fantasy for real. Oh yeah, and I would sure as hell call in to work sick on that day. I’d sure be one funky looking female, since I’m bald.
@evelyns_pet_zebra That would be a nice surprise, if you call in sick to work with a higher-pitched voice.
@MacBean that is very sweet of you to say so, I lurve you even more now, hun. =)
if it happens in the summertime, definitely go for a run without a shirt on
Go out for an expert custom bra fitting.
Shake my money maker until all the money falls out.
@MontyZuma: Yeah, I read the first “money” as “monkey.” Made that quip a little more interesting for a few seconds.
Oh yes, and then I would make a monkey.
Or two.
Write my name in the snow and dress it in Barbie clothes ;)
As Jerry Seinfeld once said:
“If I was a woman, I’d be down at the docks, waiting for the fleet to come in…”
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